Drive-Thru Drives You Out

, , , , , , | Right | October 17, 2018

(A customer comes to the drive-thru at a time we would class as off-peak, where there are only three of us plus a manager in, and everything is made to order. Generally we manage fine and only get very small lines of customers who don’t mind waiting once they know it’s all fresh.)

Customer #1: “I want seven boxes of twenty chicken nuggets, and fifteen burgers — two with extra cheese, five without pickles — and fifteen packets of fries, but I want three of them unsalted.”

Me: *struggling to keep up with the demands* “Okay, your total is [total]. Drive to the first window to pay, please.”

(They pull up to the window. I explain that it’s going to take a while to prepare the order, so I ask them to park up and tell them that I will bring it out to them when it’s done.)

Customer #1: “Oh, it’s fine. I’ll just wait here.”

Me: “No, really I am happy to bring it out for you. If anyone else has a basic order like a drink, it means we can serve them and let them on their way while we wait for your food to cook.”

Customer #1: “Nope. You just focus on getting my order done, buddy. I’ll move when I have my order.”

(I walk away, as they obviously aren’t going to move, so I try to muck in and get the order done as quickly as possible. Much to my annoyance, we suddenly get a long line of cars pulling up outside, going all the way around our restaurant. More orders come in while we are stuck, unable to serve people behind with orders for drinks, desserts, and basic sandwiches that can be made up so quickly. Eleven minutes later, we finally have everything made up and send them on their way.)

Customer #2: *shakes head* “What was that all about? I could hear them yelling impatiently from back there!”

Me: “Yeah, sorry for your wait there. Just dealing with a big order.” *hands them their order* “Here is your order. Would you like any sauces with that?”

Customer #2: “These fries are soggy. I want new ones.”

Me: “Sorry about that. I’ll get some new ones put in for you now. Would you like a free drink while you wait? Then, if you could just park up there, that would be great, and I’ll bring it right out to you.”

Customer #2: “It’s fine; I’ll just wait here.”

Me: *screams internally*

(I worked here for a year, and two years before that in retail. Between the two jobs, I must have lost about ten years from my life expectancy with stress and despair. On my next shift, I walked in and presented my manager with a letter of resignation, and promised myself I would never work in a customer-facing role again.)

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Geeking Out Over Their Stupidity

, , , , , | Right | May 10, 2018

(I’m an engineer for one of the biggest ISPs in the UK. I have a home visit next in my daily planner for a customer having trouble with their TV service. The notes claim it has been escalated as advanced, so I have a two-hour slot allocated for the visit. I turn up at the customer’s door and she just stands there looking at me for a while.)

Me: “Excuse me, just to confirm you are Mrs. [Customer]? I’m the telecom engineer you have booked to come and investigate a fault you reported with your television service.”

Customer: “Oh, yes. Um, so, is your partner still at the van or something?”

Me: “No, just me.”

Customer: “I thought you said you were a technical engineer, a nerd! Where are your glasses, crazy hair, spotty face, and fat?!”

(I am about to laugh, thinking she is joking, but she just stands there, deadly serious, waiting for an answer.)

Me: “I can assure you, I’m an engineer. Here’s my ID card. It should match the name on the text message you were sent, and as you can see, I have been fixing faults like yours since 2011. Would you like to show me where your set top box and router is located?”

Customer: *still not convinced* “I suppose. But I still can’t believe they sent out someone just like me. I know my stuff, but simply can’t get it to work at all. That’s why I called for help. For a geek!”

(She continues to suggest that she probably knows more than I do, and that I am just a kid who knows nothing. I start by checking that everything is wired up correctly ,while the customer is literally breathing down my neck, looking closely at what I am doing. I ask her a few more questions, and her answers seem normal — with exception to all the insults she also slides in.)

Me: “Well, so far, so good. It looks like you have everything wired correctly, and your broadband is functioning properly. Let’s see if I can get any life out of your set top box.”

Customer: “Look, you’re just wasting my ti– How the hell did you do that?”

Me: “There’s a red power switch on the back of the box. You hadn’t pressed it.”

Customer: *physically dragging me backwards by my shoulder to guide me out of her house* “Here’s £10. Change your report so I don’t sound stupid in your files!”

Me: “I’m afraid there is a charge of £65 if there is no fault found, or the problem relates to user error. There’s no need to pay me, but it will be added to your next bill. Would you like me to come back inside and make sure it’s set up properly and works fine?”

Customer: “F*** it. F*** you! I’m complaining right now! How dare you insult my intelligence!” *slams door*

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