Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 6

| USA | Right | January 9, 2017

Customer: “Hey, my friend works for [Company I work for]. Can I get a discount?”

Me: “Ah, no, sir. Your friend would have to be the one making the rental.”

Customer: “Well, can you be my friend?”

Me: “That’s not how it works, sir.”

Customer: “No, really, let’s be friends! I’m [Customer]! What’s your name?”

Me: “I’m [My Name], and I think we should get back to—”

Customer: “Now, hold on, what’s your last name?”

Me: “I’m a [Company] employee, sir.”

Customer: “So they don’t have last names at [Company]?”

Me: “Sir, do you want to finish this reservation? I can’t give you a discount.”

Customer: “Well, that’s cold. What kind of friend are you?”

Related:
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 5
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 4
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 3

Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 5

| USA | Right | January 7, 2017

Me: “Now sir, will you be moving in the [City] area?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “And when do you need it?”

Customer: “Today.”

Me: “All right, sir, I’ll see what’s available. Will you be moving household furniture?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “I see. Just miscellaneous boxes and such?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “Okay…” *waits for the page to load* “Will a 10′ truck be big enough for you, sir?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “All right. Most customers need about four hours with the 10′ truck. Will that work for you?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “All right, then. What time do you want to—”

Customer: “God d***, do you ever shut up? Just give me the truck.”

Related:
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 4
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 3
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 2

Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 3

| AZ, USA | Right | January 3, 2017

Caller: “I need to place an order for a 10′ truck.”

Me: “No problem, ma’am! Can I start with your phone number?”

Caller: “My WHAT?”

Me: “Your phone number, ma’am?”

Caller: “Why do you need my phone number?”

Me: “I’m building a customer profile for you, so we can contact you with your rental information later.”

Caller: “Well, I don’t want one. Just reserve a truck for me.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t finish making a reservation if I don’t have a name and phone number to put on it.”

Caller: “So now you want my name, too? I’m not letting you data-farm me!”

Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t data-farming you. We just need to know who’s renting the truck.”

Caller: “Just put me down as ‘Jane Doe.’”

Me: “Okay… I still need a phone number.”

Caller: “Again? Fine, just put [phone number].”

Me: “All right, thank you, ma’am. We’ll just skip the email address for now…” *clicks buttons*

Caller: “What, and now you want my email? I thought this was a rental company?”

Me: “I don’t need your email address; it’s an optional step for people who want us to email them their order information.”

Caller: “Well, I’m not giving it to you. I don’t want my inbox to get spammed with junkmail.”

Me: “All right, ma’am. So will you be using this rental in the [Township] area?”

Caller: “How do you know I’m from [Township]?!”

Me: “Well, that’s the center you called, so I assumed that’s where you want to—”

Caller: “Are you tracing my call? If you knew that, then why did you ask for my name?”

Me: “Ma’am, you called a [Township] [Rental Company] dealer. No one is tracing your call.”

Caller: “How do I know you’re not tracking me right now? Can you tell where I am?”

Me: “I can’t, ma’am… I have no idea where you are.”

Caller: “Good. Keep it that way.”

Me: “So, do you need it for the [Township] area?”

Caller: “Where I go with my rental is my business. All YOU need to know is that I’m picking it up at your center at 10:00 am tomorrow and I’m dropping it off before you close. ”

Me: “Okay, got it. Let me see what’s available…” *skips a few forms to get to the truck list* “All right, I see a 10′ truck here, but it won’t be available until tomorrow afternoon. Is that still okay?”

Caller: “No, you’re not listening. I said I need it tomorrow at 10:00 am.”

Me: “I understand that ma’am, but our 10′ trucks are booked all morning. Would you like me to check other nearby centers to see if there are more available?”

Caller: “No, you’re still not listening. I need it at YOUR center at 10:00 am. I didn’t call a different center because I don’t want it at their center. I need it from THIS center, and I need it at 10:00 am.”

Me: “Well, in that case, would you consider an alternate truck size? I see here that the 15′ truck would be available in your time frame.”

Caller: “NO. I DO NOT WANT A 15′ TRUCK. Stop trying to up-sell me and give me the truck I asked for.”

Me: “I’m trying to ma’am, but I’m telling you it’s booked for tomorrow morning. Someone else will have it.”

Caller: “Then what’s the point of calling ahead?”

Me: “Ah… you called the night before. That’s still very short notice.”

Caller: “So how far in advance am I supposed to call?”

Me: “Well, first of all, the weekends are very busy, and you’re calling on a Friday night to pick up a truck on Saturday. If you want a better shot at getting a truck you should try reserving a week or two in advance and set it up on a weekday. I know Tuesdays tend to be very slow—”

Caller: “Well, I didn’t know I would need a truck a week ago, and I have to work during the week.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, and that’s typically the case for everyone.”

Caller: “So instead of giving me what I ask for, all you can do is make excuses.”

Me: *slightly agitated* “Ma’am, I am doing the best I can for you. You’re telling me what you want, and I’m telling you what we have. What I have is a 15′ truck that you can pick up tomorrow at 10:00 am and keep all day. Frankly, I’m shocked I can offer that deal on such short notice. If that doesn’t work for you, then I’m afraid you’ll have to alter your plans a little bit to fit the situation.”

Caller: “Fine, whatever. I’ll take that one. I’m tired of hearing you b**** and moan.”

Me: *takes a deep breath* “All right, ma’am, I have the 15′ truck scheduled to pick up at 10:00 am. The price will be $29.95 plus $0.79 per mile and a $1 environmental fee.” *a feeling of dread creeps in* “Which credit card would you like to use to confirm this reservation?”

Caller: “NOW, HOLD ON! First you want my personal information, and now you want my CREDIT CARD?!”

Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t going to charge it. We just need it to—”

Caller: “THE H*** YOU AREN’T! After all this trouble you’re giving me, now you’re trying to hack my bank account? If you think I’m giving you something as valuable as that over the phone, then you’re crazy. I’ll pay in cash.”

Me: “I understand, but I can’t put a hold on the equipment without a card number.”

Caller: “So now you’re blackmailing me? You’re going to hold my rental hostage until I give you what you want? GO F*** YOURSELF!” *hangs up*

Related:
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 2
Doesn’t Give A Truck

Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 4

| USA | Right | October 28, 2016

Customer: “Hey, I want to rent a truck for this weekend.”

Me: “All right, sir! Let me see what’s available!” *goes through the steps*

Customer: “I need a 20′ truck.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, it looks like the 20′ is unavailable.”

Customer: “How can that be? I just drove by your place, and it’s full of trucks.”

Me: “Well, sir, they’ve been reserved for this weekend.”

Customer: “But they’re right there. I just saw them.”

Me: “Yes, sir, but customers have called in advance, kinda like what you’re doing now, and claimed them for the weekend.”

Customer: “So why are they still sitting on your lot?”

Me: “Well, sir, it’s Tuesday. They haven’t been reserved until this weekend.”

Customer: “Oh, so they’re not reserved yet! Well, why can’t you reserve one for me this weekend?”

Me: “…”

Related:
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 3
Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 2
Doesn’t Give A Truck

Doesn’t Give A Truck, Part 2

| AZ, USA | Right | October 9, 2016

Caller: “Hey, I just got a text from [Rental Company] saying my truck was stolen, but that doesn’t make any sense because I just returned it.”

Me: “Really? Dang, that sounds terrible! When was the last time you saw it?”

Caller: “Well, see, I’m not the one who turned it in; it was my brother. I gave him the keys and he took it to the [Rental Company] place and dropped it off after hours.”

Me: “I… see. And do you happen to know how exactly he went about that?”

Caller: “Oh, I don’t know. He parked it in front of your lot.”

Me: “Sir, can you tell me exactly WHERE he parked it?”

Caller: “Well, see, the center was closed, and he didn’t want to trespass or nothing, so he left it on the edge of that gas station right next door to you.”

Me: “Sir, he didn’t leave it on our premises, so it wasn’t turned in properly.”

Caller: “Hey, he sent me pictures. I’m not responsible for this. My brother turned it in, and I can prove he did.”

Me: “Did he make sure to turn in the key?”

Caller: “How was he supposed to do that? You were closed.”

Me: “Sir, there’s an after-hours drop box where you’re supposed to leave your key. You’re telling me he didn’t turn in the key?”

Caller: “No, man! He left it in the center console!”

Me: “…and he didn’t lock the doors?”

Caller: “Well, he wasn’t going to lock the keys in. That’d be pretty stupid, right?”

Me: “…”

Caller: “Anyway, I got pictures, so I can prove my brother turned it in. I won’t be held responsible, and I ain’t paying any damn fees.”

Me: “Uh…”

Caller: “So we’re good, right? I did my part. I called it in. Now it’s your problem.”

Me: “Sir, it is absolutely still your problem. That truck was stolen due to negligence. You should have told your brother how to turn it in, or else drove it in yourself. It’s still your name on the rental.”

Caller: “No way! I got pictures! I can prove he turned it in! You can’t make me pay for this! It wasn’t my fault! That truck was there, right in front of your place last night! Do you want me to send you the pictures he took?”

Me: “Sir, did you get the text from [Rental Company] before or after your brother sent you the pictures?”

Caller: “Oh, I got the text WAY after, but it doesn’t matter because we turned it in.”

Me: “Let me transfer you to customer service…”

Related:

Doesn’t Give A Truck

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