Put Them In The Hot Seat

| AL, USA | Extra Stupid, Top, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

(I always like to follow up after a trip I have booked for a customer. A couple had booked a plane flight to Florida, a small rental car, and a few nights hotel on the beach.)

Me: “Hi, Mrs. [Name]. This is [My Name] calling from [Travel Agency]. I just wanted to make sure you had a wonderful time on your trip.”

Wife: “You’ll have to speak with my husband. I’m too upset to speak with you.”

Husband: “I can’t believe you have the courage to call, after what you did. I’ve dealt with incompetence before, but you are the worst!”

Me: “I’m so sorry. What happened?”

Husband: “When I booked the flight, I told you that I wanted an aisle seat, and my wife preferred a window seat. You had us backwards on all four flights!”

Me: “I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you just swap seats? Or, say something to a flight attendant, who would have told you to just swap seats?”

Husband: “…” *click*

No Vocation For Location, Part 8

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Geography, Tourists/Travel

(We have a screen with special offers on the wall. Customer #1 is reading the board as offers flash by.)

Customer #1: “Wait, Paris is in Europe?”

Customer #2: “Really? Where did you think it was? Asia?”

Customer #1: “I never really paid much attention in Geometry class.”

(Customer #2 starts laughing as Customer #1 realizes what she just said.)

Customer #1: “Yeah… didn’t pay much attention at all.”

Related:
No Vocation For Location, Part 7
No Vocation For Location, Part 6
No Vocation For Location, Part 5
No Vocation For Location, Part 4

Straight-Talking Travel Agency

| Tel Aviv, Israel | Hotels & Lodging, Top, Tourists/Travel

Me: “Hello, this is [travel agency]; how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hello. I bought a tour to Prague from you a while ago, and yesterday I googled the hotel and… uh…”

Me: “Yes?…”

Customer: “Well, there’s lots of reviews online saying that the hotel is favored by homosexuals and lesbians.”

Me: “Really?”

Customer: “Yes. I’d like a different hotel, if you don’t mind.”

Me: “Are you sure? It could be fun!”

Customer: *laughing* “I’m not sure about that. I’m coming there with my wife, you know.”

Me: “Think about it. You’re going abroad for an exotic experience. Why not go all the way and choose a hotel with a difference?”

Customer: “I still think I’d be uncomfortable there. I have nothing against gay people, but still—”

Me: “There’s no reason you should be uncomfortable… Unless, of course, you’re having certain doubts…”

Customer: “No doubts, thank you. But how do I explain it to my wife?”

Me: “Just tell her that if she doesn’t behave herself, you’ll leave her for another man.”

Customer: *laughing hard* “Sold!”