That’s How The Christmas Cookie Crumbles

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(I am 16 years old. Several customers can discern my age from my small size and tend to try to intimidate me. Understandably, we are extremely busy during December, and I have just finished an interaction with a disgruntled customer.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how are you today?”

Awesome Customer: “My family and I come in here all of the time, so we feel that you guys are a part of our family, too. We brought you these cookies. Merry Christmas!”

(This was quite possibly the nicest thing anyone had done for our staff this holiday season. Happy Holidays, everyone!)

Santa Wouldn’t Let The Slippers Slip

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(It’s about two weeks before Christmas, and I’m finishing up some shopping. I overhear this conversation between a mother and her very young (about two-and-a-half years old) daughter.)

Daughter: *sees a pair of fuzzy pink slippers with a popular princess on them* “Mommy! Mommy! These shoes! We have to buy these shoes!”

Mother: *clearly knowing what’s coming* “No, sweetie, not today.”

Daughter: “Mommy! We have to buy these shoes!”

Mother: *very patiently* “No, we’re not shopping for us today. Put them back.”

Daughter: “Then… I’ll buy them!” *takes a step towards the cash register*

Mother: *still patient* “Sweetie, you don’t have any money. Time to put them back.”

Daughter: “Oh… okay. You buy them, then!”

(They go around like this a few times, and the little girl is getting close to throwing a tantrum in the crowded store. The mother is sounding a little less patient.)

Mother: “Sweetie, we can’t buy them today because Christmas is coming! Santa might be bringing them for Christmas.”

Daughter: *not quite buying it* “Really?”

Mother: “Yes! Santa told me so. We can’t buy them now. We have to wait for Christmas.”

Daughter: “Oh! Okay! Here!”

(She gave her mom the slippers and skipped off to look at something else. I’m pretty sure “Santa” had already bought the slippers!)

You Gotta Be Barking Mad

| CA, USA | Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

Me: “Can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “I want this stuffed duck, but do you have one that hasn’t been manhandled?”

Me: “I think we have another upstairs. Let me check for you.”

(It’s fairly busy in the store but I know exactly where another one is, so I run up to get it. A coworker of mine moved the box of stuffed animals onto a hard to reach shelf. When I reach for it I fall into another box of stuffed animals and have to work my way out. I get the toy and run downstairs looking a little disheveled.)

Me: “Here you go. Would you like that wrapped?”

Customer: “Oh, no need. It’s for my dog.”

Can’t Follow Her Train Of Thought

| USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

Me: “Can I help you find something?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m looking for a board game about trains, and there’s tickets…”

Me: “Oh, Ticket To Ride?”

Customer: “No. In the game, you collect these tickets for different routes, and you used these colored trains to connect the routes…”

Me: “That’s Ticket To Ride. It’s actually one of my favorites—”

Customer: “It’s NOT Ticket To Ride. But in the game, the different tickets are worth a certain amount of points, and the further the routes are from one another, the more points the ticket is worth…”

Me: “Hold on.”

(I grab a copy of ‘Ticket To Ride’ off the shelf and show it to her, with the name of the game facing me. An image of the game’s board is printed on the back.)

Me: “Is this the game you’re looking for?”

Customer: “Yes!” *grabs the game*

Me: “This is Ticket To Ride. ”

Customer: “Oh, then this isn’t it.” *drops it back onto the counter*

Not In A Playful Mood

| PA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I work for a major toy company at the service desk, and received a call from an older woman.)

Caller: “Could you transfer me to the toy department?”

Me: Sure, ma’am, which department did you need?”

Caller: “The toy department.”

(We get several calls of this nature a week so I am used to it.)

Me: “What can I help you with today?”

Caller: “I’m looking for a Minnie Mouse doll that sings when you hold its hands.”

Me: “Absolutely, ma’am. One moment while I look this up for you… It looks like my computer says I have a few in stock, but our inventory has been a bit off after the holidays so would you like me to run back and verify that we do in fact have it in stock?”

Caller: “Yes, please.”

(Knowing the floor person is at lunch I ask the electronics supervisor to watch the service desk while I go look for this item. I find it on the other end of the store then have to come all the way back up with this doll.)

Me: “Thank you very much for holding, I do have that doll. Would you like me to put it on hold for you?”

Caller: “No, I already have one and I really don’t like these dolls so I’m just going to return it.” *hangs up*

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