I used to work for a large toy superstore, and they decided to have a special sale on the Wii video game system.

I’ll never forget walking into work and seeing the sale sign, just a few weeks before Black Friday, that said:

Sign: “GET THE Wii FOR $99.99!”

I immediately wanted to call in sick because I knew my day was about to be destroyed, but a manager had already seen me, so it was no use.

You see, with that sale, you could indeed get the Wii (which retailed at $249.99 at the time) for $99.99, but like all deals… You had to read the fine print. 

To get the Wii for $99.99, you had to purchase $150 of other items to make that deal happen. These other items were:

• A 20-pack of our store-branded AA batteries.
• A lame looking Olympics game with popular characters from two different franchises.
• A specific gaming ottoman for the Wii.
• Four items of your choice made by Gear Ape for the Wii system.

It would ring up as $99 for the Wii and $150 for the other items, meaning you ended up spending the regular cost of the Wii of $249.99.

Did many people actually read all those details? F*** no.

I barely made it to the electronics section where I worked before I heard my phone ringing, which, as expected, was someone asking: 

Caller: “Are you guys really selling the Wii for $99?!?!”

These were the easier part of my day because I got to let the customer down gently, and because they’d already questioned the legitimacy of the sale. You see, our store had sent emails out about the deal with the subject line “GET THE Wii FOR $99.99” with the details INSIDE the email.

Then came the trouble customers. Person after person who’d thrown on their shoes and rushed to the store to get their hands on a $99 Wii, only to b**** at me when I told them there was more to the sale and they needed to read the ENTIRE email. I’ll never forget one particular woman, though.

Customer: *Walks right up to me and ignores my greeting.* “I want the Wii for $99.99!”

Me: *Internal groan.* “There’s more detail to the sale than that, you also have to purchase these other items to—”

Customer: “—I don’t care about any of that and don’t want it, I just want the Wii for $99.99!”

Me: “I’m afraid I can’t do that. The entire detail of the sale was in the email and all the advertising.”

Customer: “I just told you I don’t care about all that. The email said the Wii was $99.99, and you need to sell it to me like that.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that’s not how the sale works.”

Customer: “Then that’s false advertising. You are falsely advertising.”

Me: “It’s not false advertising. All the detail is there in black and white.”

Customer: “Not it’s not! It’s false advertising, and I want to see a manager!”

This, of course, was not the last time I had to call a manager over that day to deal with someone who started whining about false advertising. My manager did set her straight, though, and of course, she didn’t get a $99 Wii.

That sale was only three days long, but it was absolutely miserable. I got called names by rude customers, got b****ed at, and told myself I’d quit on the spot if they ever did another advertisement like that again. Yes, there was an occasional parent who thought it was a good deal, but mostly it was just people who didn’t know how to read. 

Also, for those of you about to come in and say, “Well, I’d just buy the bundle and return all the other stuff, then keep my $99 Wii”, you can’t do that. Anything sold as a bundle/deal in my Toybox store also had to be *returned* as a bundle to keep people from doing just that.

A lady brings up to us a Ziplock bag with water guns in it. The Ziplock also contains a fair amount of loose, dirty-looking water.

Customer: “My children were invited to a poolside birthday party. Each attendee was supposed to bring their own water gun. Now that the party was over, I want to return them.”

I guess I appreciate her honesty.

Me: “So… there’s nothing actually wrong with them.”

Customer: “They performed adequately. They were purchased two days ago, so I am well within the return window.”

Me: “Do you have the receipt?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Well, without that, there’s not much I can do. Even with the receipt, however, I wouldn’t be able to accept the return.”

Customer: *Suddenly angry.* “Why the h*** not?!”

Me: “Well, for one, you’re returning these wet, dirty, and inside Ziplock bags instead of their original packaging. Also, you or someone has written your children’s names on each one with a black Sharpie.”

Customer: *Grabs the bags.* “There used to be a time when stores just did as they were told!” *Storms out.*

My first ever job was a seasonal worker at a Toys “R” Us. One evening, a young family comes up to my register, a mom’n’dad, and a little girl, probably about five. The mom places a Dora the Explorer backpack on the counter.

I go through the usual script about rewards programs and credit cards, then scan the barcode tag on the backpack, but it rings up as a Yu-Gi-Oh booster pack (a card game) for about $5.

Me: “Well… that’s not right.”

Up to this point, I haven’t even picked the bag up. She has placed it on the counter tag-side up. I assume it’s just a misplaced barcode. Some backpacks have a second barcode inside near the zipper, so I turn the bag to look for it.

That’s when I feel it. 

The backpack is heavy. Way too heavy.

I unzip it and flip it upside down. A pile of toys spills out across the counter. Still in customer-service mode, I look up at her.

Me: “Did you want to get all of these too?”

Customer: “No.”

Then, without missing a beat:

Customer: “I had no idea there were toys in there. My daughter must have put them in.”

The little girl immediately speaks up.

Daughter: “But you put those in there, Mommy!”

The mom stares straight at me like her child does not exist.

Customer: “I just want the backpack.”

Now it clicks. I look back at the barcode tag and run my thumbnail under the corner. It lifts way too easily. The sticker peels off clean, no residue at all, revealing another barcode underneath. I scan it.

Screen: “$49.99.”

She takes one look at the screen.

Customer: “I’m not paying that.”

She leaves empty-handed, dragging her husband and very honest daughter with her.

A customer brings in a skateboard to the returns desk.

Customer: “I need to return this.”

Me: “What was the issue with it?”

Customer: “It doesn’t go.”

Me: “Are there issues with the wheels?”

Customer: “Let me show you.”

He calls his son over, who the skateboard was originally for, and gets him to stand on it.

Customer: “See?”

Me: “See what?”

Customer: “It isn’t going.”

His son is just standing on it. Zero attempt to use a foot to push forward is being made.

Me: “Well, yeah?”

Customer: “Why isn’t it going?”

Me: “Because it isn’t Aladdin’s magic carpet.”

I was switching between the register and customer service. An older lady came in with her grandchildren, wanting to find a gift for the older boy. I gave a few suggestions at her request, but she shut down all my attempts. I let her do her thing and choose for herself. Finally, after shuffling through everything, she went to pay.

Customer: “I’d like the points on my [Store] account.”

Me: “You have a $2 discount, but sadly, this item is non-discountable because of the brand.”

She was not happy. She raised her voice.

Customer: “Why do I have so little saved up?!”

Me: “The only way to have points is to buy stuff more often.”

The price was $23. She leaned in and asked, in a hushed tone:

Customer: “Could you do me a favor, since I’m a very good client?” *She’s not.*

Seeing as I wouldn’t budge regarding the discount, she angrily threw the toy.

Customer: *To me.* “You’re not very bright!” *To her grandson.* “It’s too expensive! Choose something else!”

The child had a tantrum and threw himself down. After everything calmed down, she went to pay for a different toy. I scanned it, and it was $25. 

This time I could apply the $2. 

She looked smug.

Customer: “Now I can have my points!”

So… this lady really made a scene to finally pay the same amount that was “too expensive” minutes ago?!

Well, that was a weird day.