Try NOT To Catch Them With Their Pants Down

, , , , , | Right | November 4, 2018

(A customer comes up to the service desk with an expensive five-pack of underwear. This customer frequently refunds stock without a receipt, so I’m wary.)

Lady: “Hi, can I return these, please?”

Me: “Uh… How come?”

Lady: “Well, see, I bought these for my husband a few weeks back, because he doesn’t wear underwear, and I’m trying to get him to. However, he still won’t wear them, so I was just after a refund.”

(I am shocked at her being so open.)

Me: “Awesome, thanks for telling me that.”

(Anyway, it was the last refund we processed for her; she went shopping straight after, and we caught her stealing on the CCTV. She and her underwear-less husband are now banned!)

Your Loyalty Is Numbered

, , , , | Romantic | March 11, 2018

(My boyfriend is shopping while I’m looking after the trolley filled with things from a previous shop. When he returns he is smirking.)

Boyfriend: “So, the girl behind the counter just asked for my number.”

(My eyebrows shoot up in surprise.)

Me: “Really?”

Boyfriend: “Yep.”

(He throws something down on the table.)

Boyfriend: “For a loyalty card.”

Me: “Wha… oh. Oh!”

Boyfriend: *laughs at my expression*