I work at a restaurant well known for its desserts and lengthy menu. Due to the nationwide shutdown, we are only doing takeout and have limited staff working. This customer places her order around 1:00 pm for an order of sweet potato fries. I inform her that they will be ready in ten minutes.

Ten minutes go by and no one has arrived, so we place the fries under a heat lamp on low. 

Twenty minutes later, she arrives and our manager goes to collect her order but finds that they are too cold to serve.

Five minutes go by, and the cooks have only just dropped the new set of fries in to cook. I am sent up to let her know it will be just a moment.

Me: “Hi! I just wanted to update you that my manager is having the fries remade as they got cold.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! This is exactly why I called ahead; why aren’t they ready yet?”

Me: “Well, we made the fries and put them under a heat lamp, but it was decided they weren’t good to serve; my manager is having a fresh batch made for you right now.”

Customer: “This is a huge inconvenience for me. What kind of compensation am I going to get?!”

Me: “Let me check with my manager; it should be just a moment.”

The length of the eye roll I had would astound. I checked in with my manager and informed him of the customer’s expectations that this wait time be compensated. He laughed, sold her the new fries, and gave her nothing extra. Moral of the story: don’t show up for French fries half an hour after you order them and be pissy that the staff wants to serve them hot!

My senior year of high school, I have two study hall periods. About a week into the school year, one of the guidance counselors approaches me during study hall.

Counselor: “[My Name], why haven’t you been attending cooking class?”

Me: “Because I’m not taking cooking class?”

Counselor: “You’re on the class roster and you’ve been marked absent every day.”

Me: “That’s weird. It’s not on my course schedule.”

Counselor: “Huh. Did you sign up for it?”

Me: “No. I signed up freshman year, but I switched classes a couple of weeks in, and I definitely didn’t sign up for it this year.”

Counselor: “Do you want to take it?”

Me: “No.”

Counselor: “Okay, I guess we’ll remove you from the class, then.”

It was admittedly unusual for a student to have two Study Halls, and I initially assumed that the cooking class took place during one of my two study halls, but I later learned that it actually shared the same time block as my AP Calculus class. Apparently, I was supposed to be in two places at once. Very strange.

I work in a small photography studio. One of our duties opening first thing in the morning is to print the updated session list and call the clients to confirm their appointments; if a client cannot be reached to confirm, their session is canceled.

It’s Easter Sunday and my manager and I are the only two working a short shift for the holiday. We call all the clients. Only one does not answer, so we leave a message and remind them that we close early and failure to call back and confirm cancels their appointment.

It’s now thirty minutes from our closing time and that client has since missed their appointment with no return call. Since no one is scheduled to come in, and no walk-ins have arrived all day, my manager gives me the okay to start closing down the shop while she takes off early.

As I am closing the till, I see a group of around eighteen people walking in the door.

Me: “Sorry, guys, we’re closing early for the holiday.”

Older Woman: “But we have an appointment.”

Me: “What is your name and what time was your appointment scheduled?”

Older Woman: “It’s under [No Answer Client] and our appointment was at [three and a half hours earlier].

Me: “I’m sorry, but you never returned our confirmation call, and you missed your appointment time.”

Older Man: “But we are here now. We had to wait for family coming in from the airport.”

I called my manager to explain and she told me to go ahead with the job, while my family waited for me at home. The clients didn’t even buy anything that day.

Our store closes at midnight on weekdays; weekends our store closes at 1:00 am. Due to this, we do not have a message telling our customers our store is closed on weeknights. I am also known for doing voice impersonations and have joked with the managers that I could take the place of the message on weeknights.

Customer: “Hello? Hello? Hell-f******-lo? Anyone there?”

General Manager: “Welcome to our [Store]; we’re closed right now.”

Customer: “F*** no, you ain’t! It’s 11:59!”

General Manager: “Our clocks read 12:01. We’re closed.”

The customer curses us off and drives away.

Me: “Can I please do the impersonation now?”

General Manager: “Yes.”

I’m a locksmith, on the way to another city for a house unlock, and I get the info for another call. I give them a call and tell them that I’m on the way to another call and in about a half-hour or so, I can call and give them a proper estimate on when I will get there.

Customer: “Oh, well, I have to open my business and I have appointments. Do you know any other locksmiths?”

Me: “Well… not really, ma’am. Like I said, though, I can give you a call in about a half-hour and let you know when I’ll be there.”

Customer: “I thought you guys would be closer; I called a number for this town.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. We are a completely mobile company. I can give you a call in about a half-hour, though.”

Customer: “Okay, whatever.”

I go and unlock the house, and I give the other customer a call; my GPS is telling me I’ll be there in about thirty-five minutes. I add about ten minutes to the ETA to accommodate any traffic or unexpected delays and just the sheer fact of me finding the place.

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name]. I just wanted to let you know I’ll be there in about forty-five minutes.”

Customer: “You said a half-hour ago you’d be here!”

Me: “Um… I think there’s a misunderstanding here. I said I’ll give you a call in about a half-hour with a more accurate ETA.”

Customer: “Well, if I knew it was going to be this long, I wouldn’t have called. How far are you again?”

Me: “About forty-five minutes ma’am.”

Customer: *Pauses* “Where are you again?”

Me: “I’m down in [Nearby City]. I just finished another call.”

Customer: “What address?”

I pause for a split second, realizing she’s going to try to GPS me and figure out exactly where I am to see if I’m lying to her. “Guest Service Mode” ACTIVATE!

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I’m not at liberty to reveal the locations of our customers.”

Customer: “Oh, well, whatever. Just get here.”

Me: “I’m already on my way.”

I start heading down there, going just a little over the speed limit to make it there without any more complaints. Of course, I don’t even get that far. About ten minutes out, my phone goes off.

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name].”

Customer: “Hi, it’s [Customer]. I just wanted to see how far away you are in minutes, since one of my appointments just showed up and he wants to know how far you are so he can decide to wait or not.”

I get an eye-twitch, having to put forth a little effort now to keep my guest service voice up.

Me: “Well, ma’am, I’m down by the Chevy dealer.”

Customer: “The one outside town?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Customer: “Okay, see you soon.” *Hangs up*

I get to her address and start working to unlock her business after I introduce myself. As I’m standing there trying to unlock the door, she keeps talking and telling me about the lock and how “I don’t know why it’s on two different keys,” and, “Whoever designed it was stupid,” and, “I lost the keys sometime last night,” etc. It gets to the point as I am trying to unlock it that I say in a very even tone:

Me: “Ma’am, I need a minute to focus on this.”

She gave me a look like “Are you a moron?” when I asked her what way she turned her key to open her door. 

As I was working on the lock, I saw that her sign said she opened at 8:00 am on Saturdays. The appointment she was running late for was at 10:30, and I got the info at 9:30 ish. So, now, I was wondering why she was ignorant enough to wait until the last minute to get her place open… and that just annoyed me.

Finally, I unlocked the deadbolt and she went in, leaving me and her client standing out there. Her client walked in, and then I took a minute to gather my tools and walked in to which I saw her with her voicemail on speakerphone, jotting down appointments. I just stood there for about five minutes before she waved me over and finally paid me.