Staying Past Closing Is A Severe Demerit

, , , , , | Right | January 18, 2019

(I work in a fast food restaurant. I am scheduled to work closing the night before school starts. Because I have an 8:00 am class, I am rushing to finish all of the closing procedures so I can leave at my scheduled time — 10:00 pm — when a group of young men comes in. Unfortunately for me, they all decide to sit in the dining room. The owner has installed cameras with audio, and listens to make sure we don’t tell customers to leave. He has had employees fired before for even hinting as such.)

Manager: “I know you need to be home soon, but don’t rush them.”

Me: “I hope they finish quickly; they’re wearing [University I attend] shirts.”

Manager: “Then maybe they’ll leave soon.”

(The young men eat quickly, but then they sit and watch videos on their phones. I wipe down tables around them, hearing that they are dorm students. After a half-hour, the manager checks on the dining room.)

Manager: “They’re still here?”

Me: *grudgingly* “Yesssss.”

Manager: “You’ve done everything else to close, right?”

Me: “Of course.”

Manager: “Just wait. Policy says we can’t tell them to leave.”

(Another two hours go by. It is now two and a half hours after our dining room is closed and two hours after I am supposed to get off. I still have to stay a half-hour after these customers leave to vacuum, so I am nearly in tears.)

Manager: “[My Name] what are you– They’re still here?!”

Me: “Yes. [Manager], I’m sorry, but I need to get home!”

Manager: “You’ve left the vacuum out to give them a hint, right?”

Me: “Of course! They even asked about it when they came up for a refill.”

Manager: “I’m sorry, I can’t tell them to leave. You know what [Owner] will say.”

Me: *gets a realization* “Actually, I know what to do.”

(My manager agrees to the plan, so she walks out to the dining room.)

Manager: “Hello, gentlemen. Still out celebrating your move in?”

Customer #1: “Yeah. School starts tomorrow, so it sucks.”

Manager: “Aw, that’s a shame. I was just talking to my employee; she also attends [University].”

(The customers start to look a little sheepish.)

Customer #2: “That’s cool.”

Customer #3: “Shame she’s out here still.”

Manager: “Don’t sweat it. Although, I have to confirm something she told me in the past, if you guys don’t mind. Is it true that [University] places severe demerits on your student profile if you’re not in your dorm before midnight?”

(The men all went wide-eyed and bolted out. Since it was past midnight and almost time for the drive-thru to close, as well, the manager made everyone help me vacuum the dining room. I got home only a few minutes before one in the morning. The store has since been bought by another company and that policy has been changed.)

A Little Change To What “A Little” Means

, , , , | Right | January 18, 2019

(I work at a dealership. At 3:56 pm, a car pulls up into the service drive. My coworker greets the customer driving the car.)

Customer: “Hi! I’m here for my appointment, but I’m a little late.”

Coworker: “Oh, what time was your appointment?”

Customer: “I forget. 9:15? 9:45?”

(Their appointment was for 8:45 am. “A little late,” indeed. We had them reschedule. We’ll see if they’ll maybe be a little less late next time.)

Drivers Know No Other Way To Get Around

, , , , , | Working | January 17, 2019

(It’s 5:30 in the morning and my supervisor and I are in the bus depot, preparing for the first shift of the day. The phone rings. It’s the other early-morning driver, who reports that his car won’t start and he won’t be able to get to work for his first run.)

Supervisor: “I can’t go to collect him because I have the first run out of [Destination #1] in fifteen minutes, and he lives way out in [Distant Suburb].”

Me: “And I have to be driving the bus out of [Destination #2] at the same time.”

Supervisor: “I’ll wake up the mechanic and see if he can help.”

(He does so, and outlines a complex plan which involves him dropping a jump-starter pack from the depot workshop to the mechanic’s house while he is en route to [Destination #1], so the mechanic will then proceed to our colleague’s place to start the car. The supervisor and I will do our own bus runs while also making deviations from our routes that cover the areas that our missing colleague would have done, until the missing driver has finally reached the depot and is able to take over. By the time the supervisor has finished sorting it out, ten minutes have passed and it’s time for us to leave for the early-morning runs.)

Supervisor: “I’ll just go and get the jump-starter pack from the workshop and head out to the mechanic’s house now and… Oh, d***. I don’t know [Colleague]’s exact street address. Would you ring him to get that while I get the jump pack and bus sorted out?”

(Before I can do so, the phone rings again.)

Colleague: “Oh, and by the way, I just moved house last weekend to [a street address only a few minute’s walk from the depot].”

Supervisor: “…”

Me: “…”

It’s Going To Be A Long Morning, Evening, Whatever

, , , , , , | Right | January 10, 2019

(I work at a local insurance company, at the call center that provides transportation for people on medicaid and medicare — people who have insurance through the state due to low income, disability, or old age. Transportation is strictly for medical appointments so that people can utilize their insurance while also staying healthy and bringing our costs down by avoiding ambulance and ER visits. This is a story my coworker told me about.)

Coworker: “Hello! Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [Coworker]; how can I help you?”

Member: “Where is my cab?! I had a ride today!”

(My coworker checks her account and sees she has a ride for 10:00 pm tonight. Notes from previous rep say, “Member insists it’s an 11 pm appointment.”)

Coworker: “Okay, ma’am, it’s a 10:00 pm pickup tonight.”

Member: “Nooooo! My appointment is at 11:45 pm this morning! I don’t need no f****** 10:00 pm pickup. WHERE IS MY CAB?!”

Coworker: “It is scheduled to come tonight. When is your appointment today?”

Member: “11:00 pm.”

Coworker: “So, tonight.”

Member: “No, you’re f****** r*****ed! 11:00 pm this morning!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, I keep hearing pm. Do you mean am?”

Member: “It’s this morning. I called yesterday.”

Coworker: “I understand that, ma’am. The issue is that you keep saying pm when I think you mean am, and I have notes here saying you did this yesterday.”

Member: “It’s one one zero f****** zero pm.”

Coworker: “So, just so I’m clear, you’re saying pm, as in this evening, as in afternoon.”

Member: “No! My surgery is before lunch!”

Coworker: “So, if I get you a pickup in the next 5 to 20 minutes, would that work?”

Member: “Yes, I want to be a couple minutes early.”

Coworker: “For your 11:45 am appointment, correct?”

Member: “I said pm, sir…”

Coworker: “So, no ride right now?”

Member: “Just send me that cab that y’all f***** up.”

(My coworker did end up setting up the cab ride, even though we have a policy against same-day-rides, as we call them. Also, before people start claiming senility or dementia, I would like to note the member was 47.)

Their Time-Keeping Is Unhealthy

, , , , , | Right | January 9, 2019

(I work in an office that closes at five. The last patient of the day is a ninety-eight-year-old lady. Her appointment is at 4:15, though she should be in fifteen minutes early to fill out papers as she’s a new patient. There’s no sign of her by 4:25, and we’re about to start closing up shop when our phone operator comes over with the patient’s daughter on the line.)

Operator: “She says they’re stuck in heavy traffic and wants to know if you’ll still see them if they can get here in ten minutes.”

Doctor: “Well… it’s probably not easy to get her mom out of the house, so… if they can make it by 4:35, sure.”

(Five minutes pass and the operator comes back again.)

Operator: “She says it’s going to be more like 4:40.”

Doctor: “Yeah… she should probably reschedule, then. I just want to give her the full amount of time for her appointment, and we have staff that leaves at five.”

(Our operator relays the message to the patient’s daughter, who does not take it well. She is furious that the doctor asked her to reschedule even after she “gave the courtesy of calling” and repeatedly calls him “incompetent” and other names. She ends her tantrum by stating that she will find another doctor for her mother.)

Me: *to doctor* “Boy, I sure am sorry we let that one get away.”

Doctor: “Yep. Oh, darn.”

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