A group from work decides to go to a major theme park. [Coworker]’s native language is not English, but he knows it well enough that he’s very comfortable speaking it. I am learning his native language, so he often throws random non-English words or phrases into conversations to give me real-life practice.

As we are waiting to get into an attraction, [Coworker] leans over to me. 

Coworker: *In his language* “How long do you think this wait is?”

Me: “Not long, I hope.”

Manager: “[My Name], your language skills are getting really good!”

Me: “I’m trying.”

Manager: “I have no idea what [Coworker] just said.”

Me: *Confused* “He said, ‘How long is the wait?’ You didn’t hear him?”

Manager: “You two have been spending too much time together.”

Coworker: *In English* “Why?”

Manager: “He said whatever he said in [His Language] and you answered in English.”

[Coworker] and I look at each other.

Coworker: “I don’t remember.”

Manager: “It wasn’t English.”

Coworker: “Good work, [My Name]! I don’t even know what language I speak anymore, but you got it!”

I am working at Disney World and it starts to rain. A guest runs up to me.

Guest: “Why is it raining? It’s Disney World!”

Me: “It does sometimes rain here.”

Guest: “But… this is Disney World!”

Me: “Yes, sir! As much as we’d love to control the weather, the magic can only go so far.”

Guest: “Well… make it go further! This ridiculous! Raining in Disney World! Disney World!“

They stormed off, complaining about us not being able to control the weather.

My husband and I were at Disney World right before the global health crisis hit. We’re strictly kosher. I did my homework and found out that there was one quick-service restaurant in every park where kosher food was available, BUT it was frozen and took time to rewarm.

Disney World between December 21st and 28th is just the teeniest bit busy, so when the staff told us there would be a bit of a delay, we took it in stride. Whatever. We were on vacation. Wait times for the rides were a bit longer than we were used to, but that was okay with us — us Toronto hicks with our cute little amusement park just outside the city limits.

We were off to one side, happily waiting for our food. And after about half an hour, one of the crew members came up to us.

Crew Member: “You know, you’ve been waiting too long. I’m comping this.”

It was totally unexpected. I don’t think we even asked at any point, “How much longer?” It was our third day, and we’d pretty much accepted that this was going to be our normal. That was a really nice perk that was completely unanticipated and obtained without fuss or causing a scene.

A couple of stressed middle-aged customers come into our restaurant.

Customer: “Um, can we be sat somewhere quiet, away from kids?”

Me: “I don’t think that’s possible.”

Customer: “Why not?!”

I look at the hordes of excited children dancing around famous characters.

Me: “Sir, this is Disney World.”

I work in a theme park. Some parents have just been told that their four- or five-year-old daughter is too short to ride this particular ride.

Customer: “Okay, honey. Stand on this platform, and we’ll come and get you after Mommy and Daddy have been on the ride.”

Me: “Sorry, but she can’t stand on the platform of the ride’s landing bay. No customers are allowed there when the ride is in operation.”

Customer: “Okay, just watch her, then.”

Me: “We can’t do that, sir. One of you will have to stay with her.”

Customer: “I’m going to put in a formal complaint about you and your rudeness!”

I ended up having to defend against a complaint because, ultimately, he wanted me and the rest of the staff to stand guard with his daughter while he and his wife went on the ride.