In Line And Out Of Line, Part 13

| Orlando, FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Popular

(I am currently working at a famous theme park when an irate customer stomps up to me basically dragging her son along.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “My son wants to go on [Extremely Popular Attraction], but there are a ton of people in the way.”

Me: “You need to wait in line like everyone else, ma’am. May I interest you in getting a Fast Pass?”

Customer: *yelling* “JUST TAKE ME AND MY SON TO THE FRONT, GOD-D*** IT!”

Me: “If I let you to the front of the line, then I’d have to let everyone to the front of the line.”

Customer: “Then why don’t you do that, dumb b****?”

Related:
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 12
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 11
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 10

Coming Face To Face With A Little Haggler

| FL, USA | Family & Kids

(I am working at a face painting location in a major theme park. I notice a small child, at most five years old, staring at the sign with all the designs on it. After a moment or two, the girl approaches me.)

Girl: “How much is it?”

Me: “Hello! Face painting is $12 to $18! The price depends on which one you pick.”

(At this point, she gives me a dirty look.)

Girl: “That’s too much! Can you lower the price?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t lower the price.”

Girl: “Ugh! Where’s your manager?!”

Me: *trying not to burst out laughing* “She’s not here right now.”

(The girl then turned and stormed off back to her parents, who were sitting on a bench across the way and had no intention of letting her get her face painted in the first place.)

Pretzel Cocktails

| Anaheim, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I am working at a vending location that sells pretzels.)

Customer: “I would like two salted pretzels.”

Customer’s Seven-Year-Old Daughter: “I don’t like salt!”

Customer: “What do you mean, you don’t like salt? You love the salt on my margaritas.”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: *to me* “What’s your problem? Is it because I let her lick my margarita?”

Me: “Here are your pretzels, ma’am.”

Sweetly Blessed

| Hollywood, CA, USA | Food & Drink, Funny Names, Popular, Tourists/Travel

(I work at Hogsmeade in the Universal Studios Hollywood.)

Me: “Hi, ma’am! Welcome to [Candy Shop]. Did you find everything you like?

Guest: “Do you have those glass candy feather pens? My daughter loves these things.”

Me: “You mean the sugar quills, right?”

Guest: “Oh, bless your heart. I want one of those candy feather pens. So, do you have those?”

Me: *takes a small breath of air, smiles, and walks from behind the counter and gets a sugar quill from a stand* “You mean this right?”

Guest: “Oh, bless your heart. Yes, that is what it looks like!”

(I ring her up and she looks at her receipt after I bag everything up for her.)

Guest: “Honey, you gave me the wrong item. That is not a candy feather pen.”

Me: “Ma’am, quills are feathered pens. They aren’t anything else. Please have a Magical day and… bless your heart.”

Theme Bark

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Bad Behavior

(I work security at a theme park. A guest tries to rush past me to get in after the park has closed, and we have closed all the entrance gates.)

Me: “Sir, this is an exit only.”

Guest: “I’m looking for my brother.”

Me: “This is an exit only, and they’re pushing everybody out.”

Guest: *yelling* “I’m looking for my brother. You can walk with me if you want.”

(I’m not allowed to leave my spot, because I’m the only one out there to make sure nobody comes back in, though I do have a little leeway as to how far away I can get, as long as I don’t go more than a couple yards away.)

Me: “How old is your brother?”

Guest: *still yelling* “Old, but he’s got two kids he’s having trouble with.”

Me: “Sir, I can’t let—”

Guest: “You can walk with me if you want.”

(He starts rushing off, and I’m about to call my sergeant over for a “disorderly conduct” when I notice him already walking over, and point to the guest. The guest turns around, having spotted his brother.)

Guest: “He’s right there. You could have just walked with me.”

(My sergeant’s gotten to the guest by this point, and speaks with him. I can’t hear what they’re saying, because I’m too far away, and there are still a decent number of people leaving. The guy leaves, and my sergeant comes over.)

Me: “I was just about to call you for a [radio code] when I saw you coming this way.”

Sergeant: “Yeah, I heard a guy yelling, and thought it was at his kid. When I turned around and saw he was yelling at you, I started making my way over.”

Me: “He blew up barely after I told him he couldn’t come in the second time.”

Sergeant: “He completely changed his attitude when he saw me.”

(My sergeant is a big guy; about six feet tall, maybe an inch or two more, and about the size of a football player. I haven’t learned what he said to the guy yet.)

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