Failed The Name Game, Part 2

| CO, USA | Bizarre, Funny Names

(My company handles hardware and software issues for several well known fast food chains. We get a ticket that I need to call the store on to confirm some information.)

Me: “Hello, I’m with [Company], your hardware company. Is the manager on duty available?”

Customer: “Umm, no [Manager] left and [Other Manager] left.”

Me: “Okay. What is your name?”

Customer: “I don’t know. Let me check.”

Related
Failed The Name Game

Your Keyboards Days Are Numbered

| NY, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

User: “Hi, I’m having an issue entering in the numbers in this field.”

Me: “Okay, let me proxy into your computer and I’ll see what I can do.”

(I proxy into the computer, click in the field, type with no issues:)

Me: “It looks like this is working okay for me; can I have you try to enter that in again?”

User: *typing* “It’s not working.”

Me: “Hmm, okay, you’re typing in numbers there?”

User: “Yes, but it’s not working.”

Me: “Can I have you press the Num Lock button on your keyboard? It should be on the right side, directly above the 7 key.”

User: “I don’t see it.”

Me: “It’s on the keyboard, on the right side. It’s near the 7 button, on the number keypad, all the way on the right of the keyboard.”

User: “I don’t see a 7.”

Me: “…Okay, so on the keyboard—”

User: “I don’t see anything like that.”

Me: “So, you’re looking at the thing you’re typing on, correct? Not at the screen?”

User: “I just don’t see a 7 anywhere here.”

(I notice that the mouse is moving on the screen, tracking back and forth across the taskbar at the bottom of Windows.)

Me: “I think you’re looking at the screen; I need you to look at the keyboard, the thing you are typing on.”

User: “I was typing in this text box…”

Me: “Oh, no, not on the screen there, but on the keyboard. The hardware under the screen, that you type with.”

User: “But I don’t see anything like that.”

Me: “Okay, so when you place your hands in a position to type—”

User: “Oh, on the KEYBOARD.”

Me: “…Yes, do you see the 7 button on the keyboard?”

User: “…”

Me: “…”

Me: “Directly above the 7 button is the Num Lock button. It’s on the far right side.”

User: “I just don’t see that.”

(10 minutes later, I discovered that the issue was a disconnected keyboard.)

Not-So-Smartphone, Part 13

| IA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am about to reset a customer’s modem and I want to know if it will disconnect our call when I do.)

Me: “Are you using a cell phone right now?”

Customer: “I have a laptop.”

Me: “…Are you using a cell phone to talk to me right now?”

Customer: “I’ve got a laptop.”

Me: *giving up* “What I’m doing will reboot your modem.”

Customer: “That’s okay. I’m on a cellphone.”

Related:
Not-So-Smart Phone, Part 12
Not-So-Smart Phone, Part 11

Not-So-Smart Phone, Part 10