Taxed By Your Lack Of Taxiing

| Dublin, Ireland | Working | March 29, 2016

(I am at the airport, looking to go to a nearby hotel. I was told that there is a complementary shuttle that takes you there but I cannot find it. I am exhausted and decide to take a taxi so I can finally go to bed. I go to the taxi line and get in the next available taxi.)

Driver: “Where to?”

Me: “[Hotel], please.”

Driver:  “Why aren’t you taking the provided shuttle?! It’s so close! You’re making me lose a good fare!”

(He is very rude the whole trip, but I say nothing. Once we arrive at the destination, he aggressively tells me the small amount I owe him. I finally decide to speak up:)

Me: “I realise that you were disappointed when I told you my destination and that after dropping me, you are right back at the queue. If you had not right away attacked me when I told you where I was going, I would have told you however that I was planning to compensate you accordingly. You see, I am on a business trip for [very large IT company]. I have a daily budget that I can use however I wish to cover my travel expenses. Any money not used is considered as bonus for me. I was planning to use the money I had left as a tip that would have easily compensated the amount you would have made for a longer fare, plus giving you the benefit of a short trip back to the station. Now guess what? You’re not getting a penny more than what I owe you for the trip. You have only your terrible service and poor manners to blame for that.”

(The driver turned an angry red, took out my luggage, and drove off without saying a word.)

Adding The Taxi Tax

| Manila, Philippines | Working | February 24, 2016

(I live in the Philippines, but because I’m Caucasian many people assume I’m a clueless tourist.)

Me: “Hello, po! Can you please take me to the bus station?”

Taxi Driver: “Sure, that’ll cost 150 pesos.”

Me: “Well, let’s go by the meter anyway.”

(The meter is set at 96 pesos, obviously from the previous fare.)

Me: “Excuse me; I think you forgot to reset the meter.”

Taxi Driver: “Oh, yeah, um…” *resets it to 40*

(After we arrive, the meter says 75 pesos. Recently the government has reset starting fares to 30 pesos, so everyone just removes 10 pesos from the end fare.)

Me: “Okay, so minus 10, that comes to 65 pesos. Here you go!”

Taxi Driver: *grumbling for losing 10 pesos* “Hey! You need to pay me 30 extra… for petrol!”

Me: “Haha, you’re hilarious. Bye!” *leaves quickly*

You’ve Been Uber-Nice!

| Chapel Hill/Durham, NC, USA | Right | February 22, 2016

(I am a new Uber driver, working my first Saturday with a full student population of 44,000 back from Christmas break with two home games. It’s been a hectic but pleasant afternoon when I pick up a woman catching the Megabus to Washington, DC, about a six to eight-hour ride. I have to drive through post-game traffic (which takes about 20 minutes), and during the ride she asked me to stop at a local restaurant to buy a snack for the trip.)

Me: “I’ve never been to [Restaurant], but have heard great things about it.”

Passenger: “Oh, it’s got really good crostini, paninis, and tramezzini. They have this amazing crostini with goat cheese, honey, and pepper.”

Me: “Sounds like a tasty combo. What’s a crostini?”

Passenger: “A small piece of toast with good stuff on top.”

Me: “Well, we’re about five minutes away. Maybe you should make a pickup call so you can make your bus.”

Passenger: “I’ll have to make it quick.”

(She calls the restaurant and is put on hold for several minutes, then orders what seems like a lot of food; by this time we are almost there.)

Passenger: “This could take a while. If you need to go park around the corner, I can find you.”

Me: “I think I can wait right here. Don’t want let your food get cold.”

(She is gone about 10 minutes. When she gets in, she hands me a small container.)

Passenger: “You’ve been very patient with me and the traffic so I got you a snack as well.”

Me: “Wow. I haven’t eaten since breakfast. Thanks a lot!”

(I dropped her off in plenty of time for the bus, and helped with the bags. Thank you, Megabus lady, you really made my 12-hour day!)

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Taxi’ing Morning

| AB, Canada | Working | February 2, 2016

(I have a job interview in the morning at nine. I get up early enough to have plenty of time and zip outside to start my vehicle so it can warm up a bit since it is -30C outside. I start the vehicle, lock the doors thinking I have my spare set in my purse, I run back into the garage where I fall face first, hurting both knees quite badly. I get up, finish getting ready, go to my vehicle to start work and I can’t get into my vehicle, I’ve locked both sets of my vehicle keys in there. And now I’ve shut the garage door on my way out so I’m essentially locked out of my house and my vehicle, it’s -30C and I have a job interview in 30 minutes. I call a cab company, panicking, explain what’s happened and they send someone out.)

Me: “Thank you so much for coming so fast, I know you guys are busy this morning.”

Cab Driver: “No problem, my boss said you sounded pretty panicked.”

Me: “Yeah, I have a job interview in 30 minutes and I’m locked out of my house and my running vehicle is close to empty so I need a ride to my mum’s house so I can get my other spare vehicle key, then a ride back to my house to pick up my vehicle.”

Cab Driver: “Oh, that’s no good! Okay, I’ll hurry up then.”

(The cab driver gets through town super fast, waits for me to grab my spare key, drives me back to my car then…)

Cab Driver: “I’ll follow you to the gas station to make sure you get there in time. Worst case I’ll zip you over to your job interview at least.”

(Worst interview morning ever. Best cab driver ever. I tipped him big and he followed me to the gas station. Didn’t get the job, but after that morning, I was just glad I got to the interview on time – all thanks to him!)

 

Dear readers! This story was originally submitted without a title, to encourage you to come up with a witty submission yourselves. After considering the many amazing suggestions in the comments section, we have come up with the title above. Thank you all for participating; we had a blast reading them!

Owns These Streets

| Sweden | Related | December 19, 2015

(I am driving a family to a restaurant. There is a mother, father, their teenage son, and his grandfather.)

Grandfather: “Hey! You need to turn; you’re going down the wrong street!”

Me: “I know that, but in order to get where we’re going we have to go down this street first, AND THEN turn. From where we came from I couldn’t pull directly onto the street we are going to, but we’ll be back on track in no time.”

(There are a few seconds of silence.)

Son: “Owned, Grandpa.”

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