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Just Put In A Coffee Vending Machine And Be Done With It

, , , , | Right | November 25, 2020

The name of my shop has one word in it which could also be used in the name of a café; let’s say it’s “Mug.” However, my shop is not a café, it does not look like a café, the window display is definitely retail, and there is no café equipment, no counter, no food, no menus, not even a table or chair. This happens way too often.

Customers: “Is this a café?”

Me: “Sorry, no.”

Customer #1: “Why not?!”

Customer #2: “Well, it should be!”

Customer #3: “Where I am supposed to get my coffee now?!”

Customer #4: “You have books, so you should be serving coffee.”

Customer #5: “Using that word is really misleading. You need to change your business name.”

Customer #6: “When are you going to put a café in?”

And [Customer #7], pushing past me to go up the stairs behind the counter:

Me: “Where are you going?”

Customer #7: “Upstairs.”

Me: “Why?”

Customer #7: “That’s where the café is!”

Me: “No, that’s where I live.”

Customer #7: “Are you sure?”

Me: “…”

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Impossible Demands: Back To The Future Edition

, , , , , , | Healthy | November 23, 2020

Customer: “Has the doctor sent you my prescription yet?”

Me: “I’ll just have a look for you.”

I check both the physical file of hard copies and our digital copies saved on the computer.

Me: “Nope, sorry, it hasn’t arrived yet.”

Customer: “Oh, that’s right. The doctor moved my appointment to this afternoon so I haven’t seen him yet.”

Me: *Pause* “That’s probably why I can’t find it. See you this afternoon, then?”

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A Great Scribe Of The Expectations Of Being A Lady

, , , , | Right | November 13, 2020

I am handing a customer her prescription. It’s standard practise (and a legal requirement) that all customers have to sign for their prescription medication.

Me: “I just need a scribble on here, please.”

Customer: “How dare you?!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Ladies do not scribble!”

Me: “Oh. I’m sorry. Can I have a squiggle, then?”

Customer: *Laughs* “Yes, I can do a squiggle!”

She signed happily and went on her way. Whew! I think I dodged a bullet there!

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A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 4

, , , , , , , | Working | October 1, 2020

With the ongoing health crisis, doctors in my state are doing consultations by phone and having their receptionists fax or email the prescriptions to the patient’s preferred pharmacy.

One particular doctor’s surgery seemed to be having trouble with their fax machine. I received about ten copies of the cover page but none of the prescriptions that were meant to be faxed with it.

I called the practise and suggested they tried email, instead. Soon after, I received an email with an attached photograph of a pile of prescriptions.

Yes, instead of scanning or photographing them individually, the receptionist put the prescriptions in a nice, neat stack so that only the top one was readable.

At least they tried, I suppose? A day later we’re still trying to get those same prescriptions. Maybe tomorrow we’ll get lucky?

A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 3
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 2
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist

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Three’s Company, But It’s Also A Family

, , , , , | Right | September 7, 2020

It’s a busy morning and we have multiple customers waiting for prescriptions.

Once one of them is ready, I call out the surname on it. Three women simultaneously step forward to claim it, and immediately, all three look confused. I then call out the first name and one of the women steps back. I now have two confused women laying claim to the prescription, which is marginally better than three.

After a few moments of conversation, we work out what is happening. 

Of the three women, two shared a surname but not a first name, and two shared a first name but not the surname. Additionally, the third lady’s surname was similar enough to the other two that it was easily mistaken if you weren’t paying close enough attention, e.g. if two of the women were named Smith, the third was named Smits.

As if this wasn’t enough of a coincidence, the two women who shared a surname (who had never met) realised that they were distantly related by marriage and quickly struck up a new friendship, agreeing to meet later on for coffee.

In well over a decade of working in the industry, I’ve never had such a coincidence!

And yes, all three ladies eventually got their own correct prescription and they all went on their merry ways.

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for September 2020!

Read the next Feel Good roundup story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for September 2020!

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