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Thanks For The Double Dose Of Guilt

, , , , | Healthy | February 13, 2022

I take a very expensive medicine. Luckily, since I live in Sweden, I don’t even pay for one month’s full use myself until I start getting it for free. The trick with this medicine is that it needs to be refrigerated, so I cannot order it home and I always need to plan my shopping when getting it since I cannot have it in my bag for too long.

I have just gotten new instructions from my doctor saying I can take out for two months instead of one, since she doesn’t think I should need to go to the pharmacy too often in the health crisis. Unluckily, the power goes that night, and I don’t know for how long, so I call medical services to find out what I should do with the medicine. Since there is a risk that it will be ruined, they tell me to take it back to the pharmacy to get new ones. Since I need a dose for that day, I go to do so, and I have to put other plans aside for the day in order to fix this.

Me: “Hi. I’m so sorry, but the power went and they said to exchange this in case it has gone bad.”

The pharmacist takes the medication and looks at it, then me, then to her computer, and then me again.

Pharmacist: “Do you know how expensive this is?”

Me: “Yes. As I said, the power went off, so the medicine might have been compromised.”

Pharmacist: “This is for two months!”

Me: “Yes, I know. I took it out yesterday — worst luck!”

She frowns and looks at her computer for a while.

Pharmacist: “Well, we don’t have any here, but you can find it at [Other Pharmacy].”

Me: “All right, should I just leave this here and go there, then?”

Pharmacist: “No, you need to bring this with you, or you can’t take out new medication again. Also, next time, perhaps you should only take out for one month; that way you won’t ruin as much of it.”

I did as she said and went a few blocks over to another pharmacy, only to have almost exactly the same conversation. I did get to make the exchange this time. I was so embarrassed and felt guilty about the whole thing, yet it was not even my fault, so thinking back, I wonder why they needed to keep rubbing it in?

Must Have Ice Cream Stuck In Their Ears

, , , | Right | February 9, 2022

My family’s store was closing down due to low profits and was selling the locale to the ice cream shop next door, which was very popular. As I was there, helping to pack out the locale, we took a break and went next door to buy some ice cream. They were very friendly and helpful when some customers walked in and ordered ice cream.

Ice Cream Man: “There you go. Now, we will close down next week as we’re moving in next door, but we open again the week after that.”

Customer: “You’re closing down? Why?”

Ice Cream Man: “Well, we are moving in next door; it is bigger and customers will be able to sit down and eat their ice cream.”

Customer: “You’re moving?! Where?!”

Ice Cream Man: “Next door.”

Customer: “But I can’t walk that far to get my ice cream!”

Ice Cream Man: “I’m sorry to hear that, but it is right next door.”

Customer: “This is unbelievable. You shouldn’t move. Is it not going well here?”

Ice Cream Man: “Yes, we are very popular which is why we need a bigger locale.”

Customer: “You’re betraying your customers! Now, where are the chairs? I want to sit down.”

Doesn’t Matter, They’re Not Listening Anyway

, , , , | Working | February 7, 2022

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I need to speak to your managing director, please.”

Me: “Our managing director is deaf and prefers to be contacted via email. I can give you the address if you’d like?”

Caller: “No, I need to speak with him directly; it’s regarding a limited-time offer. When is a good time to call back?”

Me: “You can call back any time you want; she will still be deaf.”

Making Your Eyes As Big As Dishes

, , , , | Healthy | February 7, 2022

I finally graduated as a licensed optician this year, and seeing as I have a love for storytelling, of course, I take every chance I get to ask my new coworkers about the weirdest or dumbest customers/patients they’ve encountered. So far, this story I heard from one of the sales assistants absolutely takes the cake, although I do have a close runner-up, as well.

A woman comes in, complaining over something regarding her contact lenses. My coworker asks some general troubleshooting questions: how often do you change your contacts, do you sleep with them, are you cleaning them properly? That last question is where it all goes south.

Patient: “Of course, I clean them, but that cleaner you sold me doesn’t work very well, so I just use dish soap, instead.”

Coworker: *Pauses* “You use what now?”

Patient: “Yeah, dish soap and water. See, the cleaner doesn’t get the contacts clear enough; I still see all blurry when I put them back in. The dish soap makes them much cleaner.”

Coworker: *Absolutely dumbfounded* “You can’t… do that. Your eyes could get really badly damaged from that. Please don’t. You need to use the cleaner that your optician recommended for you.”

Patient: “Well, I still think the dish soap works better.”

Lady, how have you, for your entire life, missed the glaring labels on every single dish soap ever telling you NOT to let it come in contact with your eyes?

How Do These People Operate Their Cars To Get To Work?! Part 2

, , , , , | Working | January 28, 2022

I’m the author of this story.

I’m in a meeting with a guy from the IT department, trying to sort out a security program for our public computers. The IT guy, being a professional IT guy who mostly works with other professional IT guys, is having problems understanding the average patron’s IT skills.

In the middle of my meeting, one of my coworkers knocks on my door.

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name], one of the public computers won’t connect to the Internet. You need to come and fix it.”

Me: “Did you check that all the cables are connected?”

Coworker: “Yes.”

Me: “Did you try to reboot it?”

Coworker: “Yes.”

Me: “Well, we’re in luck today because [IT Guy] is here. I’m sure he’ll be able to figure out this emergency.”

We all march out to look at the computer. I immediately spot the problem. 

Me: “Well, would you look at that? The network cable has been disconnected. Didn’t you say you checked them?”

Coworker: “Well, I can’t be expected to know how to do that!”

She wanders off. The IT guy turns to gape at me.

IT Guy: “Wow.”

Me: “Yep. And she’s supposed to be an information specialist. I rest my case.”

Related:
How Do These People Operate Their Cars To Get To Work?!