It’s The Half-Price Thought That Counts

, , , , , , | Working | June 6, 2018

(I’m at one of my local supermarkets, and I’m trying to use a self-serve checkout to scan a tray of tiramisu that’s been marked down to 50% for quick sale. There are about three orange stickers with the marked-down price and barcode, but they all refuse to scan through. I look around for assistance, but I notice that the helper has left with a customer into the main product area. However, the loss prevention security guard notices me and walks over to see if he can help me.)

Security Guard: “You okay, brother?”

Me: “Yeah, I’m just trying to scan this through, but the barcodes don’t seem to be working.”

Security Guard: “Let me have a go. I know they can be tricky, but I always find a way.”

(He twists and turns the tiramisu and tries every possible angle to get the half-price barcodes to scan.)

Security Guard: “Ah, this one’s a bit tricky. The helper should be back soon. She’ll be able to type in the—”

(He notices the regular barcode and scans it through, so it now shows as full-price in my checkout.)

Me: “Um…”

Security Guard: “There we go.” *laughs* “Told you I could do it! Stay safe, brother!” *leaves*

(The helper returns a couple seconds later, and I point out the full-price sale to her and tell her what just happened.)

Helper: “Yeah, he kind of does stuff like that. But he’s a good security guard, though.”

(She voided the full-price sale and manually typed in the special half-price barcode.)

Unfiltered Story #113073

, , , | | Unfiltered | May 29, 2018

(A customer comes up to the service desk with a half-eaten jerky stick in his hand.)

Customer: “I’d like a refund on this, please!”

Me: “Okay. Was there something wrong with it?”

Customer: “Most disgusting thing I ever put in my mouth. Honestly, it was like chewing on a testicle!”

Off (The Clock) Behavior

, , , , | | Working | May 27, 2018

(I work in the deli section of a small, independent grocery store. It’s twenty minutes past my shift end, and I’m still in the store doing some personal shopping before going home. A coworker, who has been rude to me before, starts calling out, “Deli! Deli! DELI!” until I turn around. She is with a regular customer, who gets specialty bread from the freezer out back.)

Coworker: “Do you know where the bread is? The specialty one?”

Me: “Yes, but—”

Coworker: “Go fetch it, then.”

Me: “No, I’m not on shift. It’s in the freezer and clearly labelled.”

(I go to leave. I’ve been paying for my stuff while this happens:)

Coworker: “No, you need to get it.” *to the customer* “She’ll get it for you. No worries.”

(Just as I’m about to tell her goodbye and leave, my boss — the owner of this particular store — comes out, and having heard part of the conversation, turns to me and says:)

Boss: “You can spare two minutes. I’ll wait.”

(I hate these people.)

Can It, Mother!

, , , , , | | Related | May 27, 2018

(I am in a supermarket with my mother. She swipes an empty, non-shoplifted cola can from my hand and stuffs it on a shelf.)


Mother: *hushed tone* “It’s their job to pick it up.”

Me: “That’s because there are people like you who can’t be bothered to put trash in the trash can!”

Mother: “There’s no trash can!”

Me: *points to trash can* “There’s one, like, ten feet away, just over there!”

(This isn’t the only thing about shopping we disagree on; I used to put back things other customers had decided they didn’t need and left in some random section of the store, to make the employee’s jobs easier, and she was annoyed to no end by this. I don’t do it anymore. The way I see it, if you leave baby formula in the booze section, you deserve judgement by strangers, but she’s not a fun person to shop with when she has plenty of time to do it.)

The Bra Is Wiped Out

, , , , , | | Right | May 21, 2018

(I am working on the customer service desk when a very angry woman comes up and demands to speak to a manager. I radio for one, after establishing that she doesn’t want my help, and the store manager is the one who answers. This was the exchange that I witness.)

Customer: “I’ve just been to your disabled toilet and there was no toilet roll, so I would like a refund.”

Manager: “I’m sorry about that, but what do you need a refund for exactly?”

Customer: “Well, because there was no toilet paper, I was forced to use my bra to wipe myself, so I would like the cost of my bra back.”

Manager: “I’m sorry, madam, but I am able to give you any money for that, as it was your choice to use that particular item. No one forced you to use it!”

Customer: “But it was expensive!”

Manager: “Then I suggest that you don’t use it as toilet paper!”

(He then walked away, leaving me desperately trying not to laugh at this woman! I don’t understand why she didn’t use either her underwear or sock if she was that desperate?! Why choose the item that requires the most effort to remove and costs the most money?!)

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