PIN-Headed, Part 12

, , , , , | Right | July 30, 2020

I am working at the checkout. I finish scanning a customer’s stuff.

Me: “Your total is £12.34.”

Customer: “Wow, that’s my PIN number!”


Customer: “Oops.”

PIN-Headed, Part 11
PIN-Headed, Part 10
PIN-Headed, Part 9
PIN-Headed, Part 8
PIN-Headed, Part 7

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When You DON’T Want The Juicy Details

, , , , | Right | July 28, 2020

I am twenty, working as a cashier. It is early in the morning when things are slow. This is usually when the elderly shoppers come in because they like to have the time to chat with the cashiers. I have grown accustomed to this and often engage in friendly chat with them.

Looking up from my previous customer, I see that the next one in line is an elderly gentleman.

Me: “Good morning, sir!”

I started scanning his products.

Customer: “Good morning, dearie. I have cancer!”

Me: “Oh, dear, I’m so sorry to hear that.”

I’m blanking; what just happened? Did he really just say this?

Customer: “…”

Me: “Well, uh, what kind of cancer?”

I am sensing he wants to talk about it as he is looking at me expectantly.

Customer: “Oh, well, it’s taken over almost all of my kidney and the doctors want to remove it completely, but I don’t want them to take my kidney! I need two!”

Me: “Oh, actually, you only need—”

Customer: “—so that is why I asked my son to teach me how to use ‘the Google’ and you will not believe what I found! Pomegranate juice cures cancer!”

Me: “Um… well… I don’t know about that… Wouldn’t everyone know about that, then?”

I am not equipped for these types of conversations! The customer completely glosses over my expressed doubts.

Customer: “So, how much do I owe you, dearie?”

I look at what I have been scanning and see over eight bottles of pomegranate juice.

Me: “Your total is €28.96.”

Customer: “Here you go. Have a lovely day; you are a sweetheart.”

He left with a big smile on his face. I took a break after that to deal with my heart that had been shattered into a million pieces.

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The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 14

, , , , | Working | July 24, 2020

In the days when self-serve checkouts in supermarkets are new, my husband goes to buy some groceries and a gift voucher.

He is able to scan everything, voucher included, just fine, but when it comes for him to actually hand over money, the machine asks for “cashier approval”. 

He gestures to the assistant who comes along and swipes her swipey thing without a glance, and then my husband concludes his purchase and goes home.

A month later, he gets a call from his mother — the recipient of the gift voucher — to tell us it isn’t working.

I retrieve it from her and take it back to the supermarket along with the receipt.

Me: “Hi! My husband bought this a month ago and it’s not working. I’m wondering if it wasn’t activated?”

Cashier: “Let me check.” *Swipes the card and checks* “Yeah, it hasn’t been activated. Did they do it when you went through the checkout?”

Me: “My husband bought it at the self-serve, so he swiped it and paid for it—”

I show the receipt with the matching serial number.

Me: “—so I don’t know what happened.”

Cashier: “Well, you aren’t supposed to buy gift cards at self-serve!”

Me: “Oh. Well, how was he supposed to know that?”

Cashier: “Everybody knows that. You aren’t supposed to.”

Me: “Well, the assistant at the self-serve checkouts approved it for him, so that sounds like something your staff needs to know. How would he know? What possible indication did he have?”

Cashier: “Look, I can fix it for you this time, but just so you know, you can’t buy gift vouchers at self-serve.”

She activates the voucher and gives me the activation receipt.

Cashier: “Just be careful with that next time, okay?”

She cocks her head and gives me a ridiculously patronizing look.

Cashier: “Gift vouchers can only be bought at the main registers.”

Me: “Perhaps that’s something you should inform your staff of, as well.”

So sorry, Giant Supermarket Chain, that we don’t know your magical, mystery rules that your staff don’t seem to know, either.

The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 13
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 12
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 11
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 10
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 9

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The Weight Of Responsibility

, , , , , | Working | July 23, 2020

My sister works in a supermarket. One day, my sister is next to the self-checkout operator. 

Self-Checkout Operator: “There’s a problem with self-checkout; I have the impression that it no longer takes into account the weight of the items.”

When my sister doesn’t have any customers, she glances at the self-checkout and she notices a couple with five items scan one and put all five on the scale.

Although it doesn’t beep, the self-checkout operator notices it. 

After dealing with the customers, she comes back 

Sister: “You’re right; it didn’t beep to warn of a problem.  Call [Check-Out/Front Desk Manager].”

The manager arrives.

Self-Checkout Operator: *Whispering* “There’s a problem with the machine at self-checkout. It doesn’t take the weight into account anymore.”

The manager glances around the store and notices that there are few people around.

Manager: “It’s voluntary; I took off the parameter ‘weight of the items’.”

Self-Checkout Operator & Sister: “But why?”

Manager: “So that you are more vigilant instead of waiting for the beep to go and see if there is a problem!”

Sister: “But if you’re busy with other customers, others may pass by without you being able to stop them.”

Manager: “It’s not my problem! The store manager approved my idea! Employees who are not vigilant enough will be punished.”

It didn’t take long for customers to notice and for people to come in two groups, one group simulating a problem for the self-checkout operator to come and see, allowing others to steal items.

The rate of shoplifting has skyrocketed and store management has not sanctioned anyone; otherwise, all cashiers who had at least one shift at the self-checkout should have been sanctioned.

Three weeks later, the self-checkouts were taking into account the weight of the items.

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A Hot Take On That Question

, , , , , | Right | July 23, 2020

Me: “Would you like a bag for your [BBQ cooked] chicken?”

Customer: “Nah, it’s cool.” *Pause* “Actually, it’s hot! But I’m good without a bag.”

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