Opening A Whole New World To Them

, , , , | Right | December 30, 2017

(I work for a supermarket filling shelves when a male customer, roughly mid-forties, approaches me.)

Customer: “Excuse me.”

Me: “Yes, sir?”

Customer: “This can of tuna doesn’t have a pull ring.”

Me: “Yes, some of the larger ones don’t.”

Customer: “Then how the hell am I supposed to open it?”

Me: “With a can opener?”

Customer: “A what?”

Me: “A can opener.”

Customer: “What the hell’s a can opener?”

Me: “Umm… It’s a metal kitchen tool used to open cans.”

Customer: “I’ve never heard of such a thing in all my life!”

(I took him to the kitchen section and showed him the can opener and exactly how to use it. He thanked me and walked away, looking baffled.)

Unfiltered Story #102212

, , , | Unfiltered | December 30, 2017

(I’m a cashier at Walmart who also doubles as a worker at the customer service desk from time to time. Since it’s the holidays, I’m at the service desk even more than usual. For those of you who don’t know, Walmart’s return policy for those who don’t have a receipt is to have anyone returning something worth more than $10 to present ID in place of the receipt and put the money on a gift card to be spent in the store.)

Customer: *comes to the service desk with a sweatshirt missing the tag* Morning!

Me: Good morning, how are you?

Customer: I’m good, I just need to return this. It didn’t fit.

Me: *Locates the UPC on the tag* Alright, do you have your receipt?

Customer: ..No…Does that mean I can’t return the shirt?

Me: Not necessarily. If you have a picture ID on you, I can put the license number in place of the receipt.

Customer: …Why? I don’t feel like I should be penalized for returning a shirt.

Me: You’re not being penalized, I promise. Store policy just calls for the ID number in place of the receipt if you don’t have it.

Customer: Whatever. *Literally throws ID on the desk.* I don’t care, punish me.

Me: *Loads money on gift card, types in ID number, and prints out receipt for her to sign* Fair enough, I’ll just need you to sign this for the refund.

Customer: …Seriously? Was my ID not good enough for you?

Me: It’s fine for me, Ma’am. However, I don’t control–

Customer: Just shut up. *Signs paper, snatches card and balance receipt out of my hand, then promptly storms off*

Some Sales Are Worth Crawling For

, , , , , | Right | December 28, 2017

Many years ago I was working at a supermarket as night-fill staff, where we restock the shelves after closing time. It was about 10 pm, and the roller shutter was three quarters shut, the lights in the mall were off, and the front of the shop was full of boxes.

A woman crawled under the mostly-shut roller door, then asked if we were open and if she could buy a couple of things!

Addicted To This Routine

, , , | Healthy | December 27, 2017

(Our supermarket has a resident addict. Somewhere in there is a nice guy who made some very bad decisions some time ago. He is permanently off his face on whatever he can get his hands on. Some variant on this conversation takes place at least daily:)

Member Of Staff: “Right, [Addict], you’ll need to go. You’re barred, remember?”

Addict: “Am I? Why?”

Member Of Staff: “Because you keep trying to nick stuff.”

Addict: “Well, yes, I do, but I don’t remember being barred for it.”

Member Of Staff: “You were off your face at the time, so you probably wouldn’t, but you are. Trust me.”

Addict: “Well, if you say so. Will I remember this conversation tomorrow?”

Member Of Staff: “Probably not.”

Addict: “Right, well. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” *leaves*

And Have A Happy Friday Eve!

, , , , , | Right | December 26, 2017

(It’s my second Christmas working retail, and my first working behind the tills. While I’m not in any way religious, I still celebrate Christmas and other Christian holidays as a time to spend with family, have nice food, and sometimes exchange presents. A regular customer, a woman wearing a chador, comes up to the till. I’m wearing a Santa hat.)

Customer: *gestures to my hat* “You doing anything nice for Christmas?”

Me: “Oh, just the standard family and food. Are you doing anything nice this week?”

Customer: “No, not really, though you’d be surprised how many people ask what I’m doing for Christmas.”

Me: “Really? You’d think it would be a bit obvious.”

Customer: “You’d think. Have a nice Christmas!”

Me: “Have a nice Friday!”

(She was one of the only customers who asked me about my plans for Christmas, which meant a lot to me as she wasn’t normally very talkative. When I saw her after Christmas, I asked her how her Friday was, and she asked me how Christmas went and we had a laugh about it. We had pretty much the same conversation again at Easter. Apparently I was the only person who didn’t ask her, a kind-of-obvious Muslim, what she was doing on Christian holidays, and it meant a lot to her!)

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