Senile Selling Point

, | West Yorkshire, England, UK | Working | July 4, 2017

(My grandmother has advanced dementia at this time. I’m a teenager. I’m taking her round the supermarket, collecting food (which I or my mother will later cook for her). We have to get the exact same food every time, or she won’t eat it. We go to the fish counter and I wait for a bit, just in case she’s able to communicate on her own today. After several minutes of her staring at nothing in particular – not seeming aware of where she is – I point to the salmon.)

Me: “Would you like some salmon today?”

Grandmother: “…”

Shop Assistant: *glares at me, then looks at my grandmother* “What would you like today?”

Grandmother: *stares at food, then at me, then starts playing with some toys in a bag*

Me: “Would you like the salmon? That’s the one you usually get. It’s on the list, see?” *shows her the list, which she stares at for a while without recognition* “Let’s get some salmon, okay?”

Shop Assistant: *annoyed* “She can decide for herself!”

Me: *to Grandmother* “How about the salmon? It’s this pink fish here.” *points* “Would you like this one for your dinner?” *Grandmother looks at the fish*

Shop Assistant: *angry* “You kids need to start treating your elders with some respect. She can decide for herself. She doesn’t need you bullying her into getting something she doesn’t want.”

Me: *ignoring him so that I don’t get into an argument and agitate her* “This fish here. This one is for your dinner.”

Grandmother: *stares at the fish a bit longer, then slowly nods*

(The assistant glared at me, wrapped the fish, and attempted to hand it to my grandmother. She didn’t take it. He wouldn’t give it to me and just put it on the counter before storming off. This happened every time! Early on, I tried to explain she was senile, but he didn’t believe me…)

The Price Is Timely

, , , , | Right | June 29, 2017

(I work in the deli of a supermarket, and I have just headed out on my 15 minute break. I stop by one of the registers so I can buy a snack for my break. The woman getting checked out in front of me has only a few items, including a pre-cooked rotisserie chicken.)

Customer: *watching her items being listed on the screen to see the total* “What? Isn’t the chicken five dollars?”

Cashier: “Oh, no, the chickens are almost always $11.49, ma’am.”

Customer: “No, I know this one is five dollars.”

Cashier: “Ma’am, I know that these are never that inexpensive.”

Customer: “Look at it; you didn’t even look at it.”

(The customer is starting to grow even more impatient and rude with the poor girl behind the register. The cashier opens the bag and looks at the chicken, spotting her mistake.)

Customer: “See? It says five right there on the tag.”

Cashier: “Oh, no, I see where your mistake was. This tag shows the time that the chicken was put out, which was five o’clock.”


(The customer continued with this line of insults and complaints while the rest of her items were being rung up.)

Customer: “I don’t even want half of this s*** anymore; it’s too expensive now that I got ripped off on this chicken by you guys.”

Me: “Oh, wow, you’re right. It’s such a rip off when you can’t read the label right. You should bring it to the Supreme Court.”

(After that, the customer shot me a long glare, but decided not to complain anymore. The cashier thanked me for shutting the woman up and making her day a little better!)

Mismanaged That Marriage

, , | Right | June 29, 2017

(I’m in a store I where I used to work. I still have friendly relations with the workers and the manager, so occasionally I drop by to say hello and get groceries. I’m next in the line to check out, and am making small talk with the cashier, whom I know. As we are exchanging simple questions like “how’s it going,” the woman who is currently being served gets annoyed and angry.)

Customer: “You know, this is horrible customer service! You are supposed to give your attention to me alone!”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I know this customer in person. My apologies.”

Customer: “You will be sorry! I am the manager’s wife!”

(The cashier and I look at each other and burst out laughing. The lady is, understandably, getting angrier.)

Customer: “What are you laughing at? How dare you! I’ll make sure you are fired!”

(As if on cue, the (male) manager in question spots me and comes bounding over to greet me. I am also male)

Manager: “Heeeey, honey! Finally decided to come work here again as my love slave?”

(The cashier is now laughing her a** off, as I get a big sloppy kiss on my cheek from the very flamboyant, very gay manager. I can’t resist the temptation, and decide to antagonize the lady further.)

Me: “Is this your husband, ma’am?”

(She dropped her groceries and stormed out, her face redder than I thought humanly possible.)

1 Thumbs

There’s Blood In The Water

, , , , | Right | June 27, 2017

(I work at the fishmonger’s counter where we have a display selling whole, gutted salmon in bags for £4/kg. A young woman and her daughter approach the display and order some fish. This conversation takes place as I am wrapping it.)

Child: “Mummy, look at the big fish!”

Customer: “Yeah, it’s really big, isn’t it!” *pauses, to me* “What’s that red stuff? Is that blood?”

Me: “Yep. We get these in gutted so there’s a little blood from being packed immediately after.”

Customer: “I just didn’t know fish had blood.”

H2-Slow, Part 16

, , | Romantic | June 21, 2017

(I promise I am usually not a stupid person, but for some reason on some days I have severe pregnancy brain, especially since hitting third trimester. I am at the supermarket with my husband, and we have to pick up — amongst other things — water and milk. We get to the water and he takes a pack of six big bottles, then we move on to get milk. In the aisle with the milk is also milk powder, and while I look at it a *genius* thought comes to my mind.)

Me: “Milk powder is actually really smart. You can carry it easily and you can get a lot of milk from it.”

Husband: “That’s true.”

Me: “I wonder if they will ever make that for water as well. Then I could buy it without you, because I could carry it on my own.”

Husband: “What do you mean?”

Me: “Well, just like milk powder, if they would dehydrate water and make water powder, then you could buy it at the store and at home, if you need water, then you just…” *at this point I realize that what I am about to say is not as smart as it sounded in my head just a minute ago* “…add water.”

(My husband looked at me not knowing what to say without making me feel stupid, so he just laughed, hugged me, and never spoke of it again.)


Page 13/118First...1112131415...Last
« Previous
Next »