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Runaway Success

, , , , , | Learning | August 10, 2025

I’ve previously shared a few stories of the time I used to volunteer to help at a Sunday school for kids ages 3-6 when I was a teenager. I volunteered not out of religious devotion (at the time, I was still trying to be a good Christian, now I’m sadly a heathen atheist) but mostly because I was just starting to realize I loved working with children, and this gave me my first real practice with kids.

As an aid, I was responsible for filling in for all the odds and ends the teacher couldn’t do. I’d handle helping welcome kids to the class and get them situated and happy, handing out snacks, bathroom runs, doing the weekly puppet show, etc., but probably my most important job was handling unruly children to keep them from disrupting the rest of the class. Usually, this was as simple as a whispered correction in their ear or setting a kid on my lap during lesson time.

That is, until [Boy] started coming to our classroom. [Boy] was the exact opposite of what a teacher wants out of a student; he was a disruption and a distraction that could bring the entire classroom to a halt single-handedly. As a teen who was still relatively inexperienced with children, I didn’t have a clue how to handle him. He would talk over the lesson constantly, get too physical with other kids, Whenever we took the kids for a mid-class bathroom break he would bolt down the hallway and make me chase after him as I tried to escort the boys back to the classroom, It was almost as if he was trying to be as disruptive as humanly possible.

His mother knew he could be a handful and had warned us when she first left him with us. She’d told us if he was ever too much trouble, we could take him back to her, and on more than one occasion, the teacher in the class instructed me to do exactly that when he was single-handedly interrupting the entire classroom.

I’d figure [Boy] would hate me, considering it was basically my job to show up and interrupt all his fun during class, but then one day [Boy] came in to class feeling sick and tired, and all he wanted to do the entire class was have me hold him. He cuddled into me as if I was his favorite person in the world and the only one that could make him feel better. I couldn’t understand why he would treat me like he valued me rather than see me as an adversary! It was so unusual that it made me think back and start to reevaluate our little problem child’s past behaviors.

What I realized was that [Boy] just wanted attention but didn’t yet distinguish between positive and negative attention. He ran from me only because he knew I would chase him, and he saw it as a fun game to play. Likewise, most of his other interruptive behavior during class was attention seeking, and he liked me because he was getting attention from me whenever I stepped in to handle whatever disruptive behavior he was getting up to.

Now that I knew this, I set out to teach him that he should be seeking positive attention instead of negative attention. This started by simply not chasing him when he ran off down empty church hallways. I’d get the rest of the kid into the classroom and then pretend to go in myself and ignore him – though I did secretly keep an eye on him to make sure he didn’t hurt himself or anything while in the hallway, and sure enough he soon came back to the classroom on his own disappointed I didn’t chase him. After a few repeats of this, he stopped trying to run away.

I got permission from his mother to use a time-out with him, and next time he interrupted class, he was moved into a corner for a time-out. He only had to sit there for a minute before he could return to the class, except he had to be sitting still and quietly for that minute. He would try to get up and run away, so I had to sit beside him during this time to stop his running, but despite this, I refused his many attempts to engage me. I’d stop him if he tried to get up from the chair, but otherwise, he got no interaction beyond an occasional reminder that we couldn’t interact during time out.

His refusal to sit quietly, even for half a minute, meant he went the entire lesson in time out for three weekends in a row. I was about ready to give up on my goal when he finally managed to get out of time out after only half a lesson of his fighting time out. I applauded him for sitting still long enough to get out and offered to let him come back and sit on my lap during the rest of the lesson.

This wasn’t the only time he sat on my lap. In conjunction with my trying to remove the attention he was seeking when he misbehaved, I tried to give him as much positive attention as I could when he behaved. He got first dibs on sitting on my lap during lessons – though he would get moved to the floor next to me when my lap was needed for another child. He got praise as soon as I could give it for relatively minor feats of going a half a minute without interrupting the teacher, and or not upsetting any fellow classmates during snack time. I found every possible excuse I could to give positive reinforcement at first.

He eventually got the message that he got the attention he so desperately craved only when he behaved. Over time he got fewer and fewer time out and he could almost go the entire lesson without interrupting – though he did have a tendency to stop listening to lesson so he could turn to me and ask if he was ‘being good’ which left me stuck explaining he had been good but interrupting lessons to ask if you are good was an example of a not-good behavior.

Over the months, I slowly pulled back on the positive attention as well. I still praised him, but I required more and more positive behavior before he got his praise, rather than my original desperate attempt to find just a few seconds when he wasn’t being disruptive, so I’d have an excuse to praise him. And he adjusted accordingly, being less disruptive and clearly doing the best his little hyperactive self could manage to earn that praise.

I was rather proud of his progress with us over the next half a year, but the moment I most remember came shortly before I had to leave the Sunday school entirely to go to college. The teacher of the class informed me, as I was about to leave, that she had just spoken to [Boy]’s mother and [Mother] had informed [Teacher] that she had decided to send [Boy] to his first year of kindergarten at the end of summer. She had originally planned to wait another year, knowing how disruptive he could be, but she had noticed how much progress he had made in our class, and she now felt he could manage in a school environment. [Mother] had wanted to relay her thanks to both of us for helping [Son].

I doubt that kid remembers me all these years later, but I sure remember him. I’m glad I could help him to do better in our class and, hopefully, in school as well. But more than that, I feel I owe him a thank you for teaching me a valuable lesson that I’ve tried to remember as I continue to work with kids all these years later. That I shouldn’t be so quick to label a child a ‘bad’ child, and that often it’s the ones that others are quick to write off as problems that most need an adult willing to listen to them and care for them.

Welcome To The Big Kids’ Bible Study

, , , , , , , | Learning | March 29, 2024

When I was school-aged, my mother would drop me off at Sunday school while she attended the adult church service.

As was typical, in the weeks before Christmas, we were inundated with the story of Jesus’s birth: being born in the barn, cradled in a manger, visits from the Wise Men, the little drummer boy, etc.

Then, right after Christmas, we were taught about some of Jesus’s teachings. This led up to Easter, where Jesus was betrayed, arrested, convicted, and then executed.

One of my female classmates broke into tears when we first were taught about his execution, which was rather brutal. The teacher tried to console the girl.

Teacher: “It’s okay. This happened hundreds of years ago.”

Girl: “But he was just a baby!”

She obviously didn’t get that the narrative was covering his whole life; she thought it was happening in real time. Still, the crucifixion story is a bit graphic for elementary kids to handle.

The Cake Is A Lie, Part 12

, , , , , | Learning | January 18, 2024

This happened in Sunday school when I was six years old. The first time one of the kids in my class had their birthday on a Sunday, the teacher brought out a birthday cake. Candles were placed around the top, and we sang Happy Birthday. My classmate blew out the candles, and the teacher took the cake into the kitchen next to our classroom.

Instead of bringing out plates with slices of cake for the eight of us in the class, she came out with a cookie and some Kool-Aid.

Where was the cake? Why didn’t we get a piece of cake?

I was disappointed and didn’t enjoy the cookie that much. But I ate my cookie, nonetheless. It’s all we were given.

When we got home after church service, I complained to my mom about not getting a piece of that cake.

Chuckling, she explained to me that the cake was made of papier-mâché with rosettes that had holes for the candles.

But I was still disappointed.

Related:
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 11
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 10
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 9
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 8
The Cake Is A Lie, Part 7

Your Director Is So Fired

, , , , , , , , | Learning | December 25, 2022

When I was around second grade, my church put on a Christmas play involving every child in Sunday school, telling the story of Jesus’s birth. I was cast as one of the three wise men, and our role was to stand in front of the mics, look up at the ceiling, and comment on the Star of Bethlehem. In order to prevent us from looking in three different directions, we were told beforehand to look in the direction of the ceiling fan. Unfortunately, I had no idea where the fan was in the nave, especially in the darkened room.

Wise Man #1: “Wow, look at that star!”

Wise Man #2: “That star is shining so bright!”

Me: “What could that star mean?” *Pauses* “Where is that stupid star?”

My mom told me afterward that all the adults around her thought it was adorable, which totally made up for the other kids telling me their parents were recording the play and I blew their big moment.

Comments About Babies From The Mouths Of Babes

, , , , , , | Learning | December 3, 2021

I’m volunteering at my church’s Vacation Bible Camp during the summer, leading the first-grade group. This mostly involves wrangling wriggly children and preventing them from knocking down intricate butcher paper decorations.

At one point, we have to wait outside one station while the previous class is finishing up. To keep the kids occupied, I start asking them about their plans for the fall. One kid pipes up.

Student: “What grade are you going to be in?”

Me: “I’m actually out of school.”

Student: “So, what are you doing in the fall?”

Me: “Well, I’m engaged, so I’ll be getting married this fall.”

Student: “Oh, so, you’re pregnant.”

Luckily, none of the other teachers in this very traditional church setting were around to hear, and I quickly corrected him, but I had to wonder what order these things typically happened in his family for a six-year-old to reach that conclusion!