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On The Futility Of Signs, Part 2

, , | Right | December 10, 2007

Customer: “Are you out of Shrek the Third?”

Me: “Yes, everything I have is out on the shelves.”

Customer: “Oh.”

(Customer goes back into the rest of store, then comes back to front.)

Customer: “There’s a copy out there that says ‘FOR SALE ONLY.'”

Me: “Mmhm, there sure is.”

Customer: “Can we rent that?”

 

On The Need For Consumer IQ Requirements

, | Right | December 7, 2007

Customer: “Hello, I’d like to return this gas cooker…”

Me: “Sure, what’s the problem with it, madam?”

Customer: “The picture on the front of the box shows meat, although when I opened the box there was no meat inside…”

Me: *In astonishment* “Okay, I’ll just go and get my manager…”

Like, Oh My God!

, , , , | Right | December 6, 2007

College Girl #1: “Our friend is registered here, but we can’t find her name on the computer.”

College Girl #2: “Yeah, it’s broken.”

College Girl #1: “She’s like one of our best friends and we need to get her a present.”

College Girl #2: “Yeah.”

Me: “Oh, okay, well let’s try it again.”

(We walk over to the gift registry kiosk.)

Me: “So is your friend registered for a wedding or baby shower?”

(The two girls look at each other confused.)

College Girl #2: “…Wedding?”

Me: “Okay…what’s her first name?”

College Girl #1: “Sarah…”

Me: “Is that with an ‘h’ at the end, or is it just S-A-R-A?”

(The two girls look at each other confused.)

Me: “Okay, well the computer can search using the first two letters of the first name, so we’ll just put in S-A. And what is her last name?”

College Girl #1: *says something unintelligible that sounds like “Pheuyben”*

Me: “And how do you spell it?”

(The girls look at each other confused.)

College Girl #2: “Um…”

College Girl #1: “Uh…”

Me: “Does it start with an ‘f’ or a ‘p-h’?”

College Girl #1: “P-h.”

College Girl #2: “F.”

(The girls look at each other confused. Oh. My. God. If I had “best friends” like that I’d swallow some Drano.)

On The Futility Of Signs

, , | Right | December 3, 2007

(One customer complains about a game that is not giving tickets. Upon looking at the game, I discover that a fuse is blown. I place several “Out of Order” stickers over the coin slot and refund the customer. Two minutes later another customer approaches.)

Customer: “I just put a coin in this game and won tickets but none came out.”

Me: “I placed an ‘Out of Order’ sticker on the coin slot. Is it not on there anymore?”

Customer: “You mean these? They were in the way so I removed them. Can I get a refund?”


This story is part of the Customers-Ignoring-Signs roundup!

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They Don’t Have Faucets Where They’re From

, | Right | November 30, 2007

(We have people wash their hands when they have to take out or put in contact lenses. Only one knob works for the faucet so we removed the other knob)

Customer: “How do you turn this?” *grabs at the stump where the knob was removed*

Me: “You use the other one.”