A good number of years ago, when I was still teaching the introductory engineering tech class, one of the major units was measurement. This covered general to high precision measurement, everything from standard rulers and tape measures, to surveying measuring tools, to machine shop measuring tools. A number of the students, despite being in a course of study they selected, didn’t see the value of the basic skills for several high-paying trades and professions.

Most didn’t pay attention to the general measurement portion, using various types of rulers and an engineer’s scale. Many liked the introduction to surveying tech portion, as they got to go outside. One student in particular saw no point in the portion for calipers and micrometers- tools used to measure to lightwave length precision. The finest instrument we used was accurate to 0.5 millionth of a meter.

The student said, in essence, that he had no need to know how to use these tools, as if he didn’t pass, he would become a p*rn star instead.

Another student told him that he’d still need to know, since there he’d need the micrometer to get critical measures for his resume.

It took several minutes to get the class back.

A classmate has a very distinctive look, and I think it’s really cool. I’m a little intimidated by her (and her permanent scowl and combat boots), but eventually I gather the courage to tell her that I find one of her outfits amazing. We’re walking to class one day.

Me: “Hey, [Classmate]! I love your skirt! Your Bohemian style is really cool.”

She stops in her tracks.

Classmate: “THANK YOU!”

Me: “Yeah, it really looks nice!”

Classmate: “NO! Well, I mean, yes, thank you, but – thank you for calling it what it is! It’s Bohemian!”

Me: “…does no one else call it that?”

Classmate: “Everyone else calls it ‘wannabe steampunk’ or ‘cottagecore goth’. It’s not! It’s Bohemian!”

Me: “I’m surprised people call it other things… but it’s clearly your style, and it works and looks great on you.”

She smiled the entire class, and I felt good that I made someone happy that day.

The teacher is going over a map of the United States. This is not a geography lesson, and we’re all high school-aged, so we know all the states. The map is just required for the discussion we’re having.

Teacher: “So then Alaska has the Aleutian islands, that—”

Student #1: “—That’s not real.”

Teacher: “What’s not real?”

Student #1: “Alaska. It’s fake. Nobody actually knows anyone from there. It’s just something the government made up.”

The room bursts into laughter. [Student #1] was speaking seriously, but the class’s reaction is making them seem less confident.

Student #2: “So who’s been sending all the fish and oil then, Bigfoot?”

Student #3: “Where do all the reality shows about Alaskan crab fishing get filmed?”

Student #2: “And Ice Road Truckers! Who are they?!”

Student #3: *In a mocking tone.* “Actors! It’s staged! I’ve never met an Alaskan, have you?”

The teacher pinches the bridge of their nose, trying not to laugh, and gets things back on track.

A few months later, we had a new student join us who just moved from Anchorage, and the jokes started up all over again…

Years ago, I was sitting in a university lecture. It was towards the start of the academic year, and the particular subject was animal ethics and welfare. We were being introduced to a lecture about how welfare has changed over the year when a girl walked into the hall, apologised for being late, and found a seat.

I don’t recognise her, but don’t question it. Maybe she was a late starter. The lesson continued for about half an hour, and the tutor stopped because someone had their hand raised. It was the girl from before. The latecomer.

Tutor: “Yes? Do you have a question?”

Girl: “No, I’m actually in the wrong class. I’m looking for [completely different course altogether]. I’d best go and find my class, but this was so interesting; I wish I could stay!”

She left, albeit reluctantly, and the tutor was pleased that he had taught something so worth sticking around for!

It’s the first day of a graduate seminar. The professor has a noticeable Spanish accent, but he hasn’t said where he’s from yet. He steps out briefly to make copies, and the room immediately buzzes.

Student #1: *Whispering.* “Where do you think he’s from?”

Student #2: “I dunno… maybe South America?”

Student #3: “Could be European, right? He kind of looks European.”

Student #4: *Confidently.* “If he speaks Spanish, he’s Mexican. Duh.”

The room goes silent.

Me: “Uh… not necessarily.”

Student #3: “Yeah, there are lots of Spanish-speaking countries… not to mention Spain.”

Student #4: “Spain, Spanish, whatever.”

Me: “…Whatever? Spain is in Europe.”

Student #4: *Stares blankly, then frowns.* “Wait… Spain is in Europe?”

The professor walks back in, completely oblivious, while twenty grad students actually face-palmed in unison. I’m yet to see anything like it since.