Unfiltered Story #159841

, | Unfiltered | July 31, 2019

I work in a relatively quiet stationery store in a small town. I speak fluent Polish as it’s my first language but most people don’t realise that since I don’t have a foreign accent and speak fluent English. It’s a Sunday afternoon, the store is set to close in half an hour, I’m restocking the glues isle whilst a Polish couple walks in and starts browsing. They speak to each other in Polish whilst looking at the stock.

Lady: I really want a diary with metric conversions, like, you know, metres to centimetres, grams to kilograms, but I’m not sure if they do it, can’t find one.

Man: Ask the assistant then.

Lady: Oh, no she seems like a dumbass, she probably won’t even know what I mean, since she’s English.

They walk up to the counter with some plastic pockets, I ring them up through the till with a huge smile on my face.

Lady: *in a very square accent* Do you accept college card?

Me: Tak, akceptujemy. Razem to bedzie £3.49. [in english: yes, we do accept them, that will be £3.49 altogether]

The lady’s face completely dropped when she realised I understood every word she said about me, she didn’t even present her college discount card in the end and rushed off once she paid.

Me: Do widzenia! [in english: See you soon!]

Needs To Coin A New Term For That Level Of Lazy

, , , , , , , | Working | May 12, 2019

(I’m buying a few things in a stationery shop. The cashier is in his early 20s, the same age as me.)

Cashier: “£5.70, please.”

(I hand over £6 in cash.)

Cashier: *dramatic sigh* “Can you pay by card today?”

(I’m totally thrown, as I’ve never been asked this question.)

Me: “Umm… no.”

Cashier: *very rudely* “It’s just, if you pay by cash, I have to do change. Give me your card.” *holds his hand out for my card*

Me: “Er… yeah. You have to do change.”

(From where I am standing, I can see that his screen has gone blue and says, “CHANGE = 0.30p” in massive white font.)

Cashier: *snappy, arrogant, and rude* “Look. For future reference, I suggest paying by card. It’s so much easier than cash.”

Me: “I’d like my 30p now, please.”

(He sighs dramatically and looks down at his drawer. He seems to think about it for a bit too long, then presses a button. A manager comes over.)

Cashier: *like the whole thing is beneath him* “It’s 10p three times, isn’t it? Which one is 10p?”

Manager: “Just go.” *to me, while giving me my 30p* “I’d have more time for him if he wasn’t familiar with British currency, but he’s over 20 and doesn’t know the difference between a 2p and a £2 coin. Born here, that kid, and I’ve told him which is which every day for months. He just insists everyone should use cards. So rude to people, too.”

(I’ve been back since and the anti-change guy wasn’t there. What’s so bad about a few coins?)

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She’s Giving You Her Two Cents

, , , , | Right | February 18, 2019

(A customer who has just purchased a lot of items comes back up to the counter to show me her receipt.)

Me: “Hello. Is everything okay?”

Customer: “There was a deal on the sellotape, and it hasn’t come off my total.”

Me: “Okay, could you tell me what the deal was?”

Customer: “Yes, it said they were two for £5.” *points to a display that says two for £5*

(I look at her receipt to see that the sellotape was individually priced at £2.49, meaning the total for 2 comes to £4.98.)

Me: “Oh, they were £2.49 each, which comes to under £5, so you were charged £4.98.”

Customer: *beginning to sound annoyed* “Why did it say 2 for £5?! That’s false advertising!”

Me: “I’m sorry, that might have been an old deal; the head office always changes prices and deals and doesn’t always tell us. Luckily, you weren’t overcharged.”

Customer: “I still want a refund. I don’t like giving my money to false advertisers.”

Me: “Sure… Okay.”

(I went ahead and processed a refund for £4.98.)

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Immeasurable Confusion, Part 2

| Right | May 26, 2016

(A posh, seemingly well-educated older man comes into our shop. He’d been in several times before and was always very pleasant so I didn’t mind taking some extra time to help him out. He told me he’d broken his ruler and wanted a new one so I took him to the right aisle.)

Me: “What size were you after?”

Customer: *picking up a six inch ruler* “This is it. This is the size of the old one.”

Me: “Okay, no problem.”

Customer: “Only… my old one had metric on one side and imperial on the other.”

Me: *pointing it out to him* “Yes, this one has that too. That side’s centimetres; that’s inches.”

Customer: “No, no. That’s not like my old one.”

Me: “How was yours different?”

Customer: “Well, it was almost exactly like this only the lines on this side matched up with the lines on that side.”

Me: “Sorry, do you mean the first line on the metric side was level with the first line on the imperial side?”

Customer: “Yes, but they matched up all the way along.”

Me: “As in… no, I think I’ve misunderstood you here.”

Customer: “As in the one centimetre line was level with the one inch line, the two centimetre with the two inch line and so on.”

Me: “Ah, I think what you had there was centimetres on one side, millimetres on the other. They’re both metric, ten millimetres to every centimetre so the lines would match up on every centimetre.”

Customer: “No, I assure you; it’s centimetres one side, inches on the other and they match.”

Me: “I don’t see how that could be possible. They’re completely different units of measurement.”

(I point out the difference in size between the two but he’s very confident that he’s right. I start to think maybe I’ve missed something.)

Customer: “I’ve been using that ruler for years and I can absolutely assure you that it’s what I just described.”

Me: “Erm… the ruler wasn’t curved or something was it? Like a protractor?”

Customer: “No, no, no. I tell you what, I’ll buy this one now and I’ll send you the old one through the post so you can have a look at it and see what I mean.”

Me: *quite curious now* “Okay, I’d quite like to see this.”

(I make the sale and true to his word, a few days later an envelope arrives with a friendly note, suggesting that perhaps it’s an old fashioned style of ruler which is why I’ve never seen it before as he’d been using it in his office for many years. I take the broken ruler out of the envelope and discover that it’s metric both sides. I show my colleague and she tells me he’s been in charge of a large estate for years which by now he may well have turned into a tiny model village due to a miscalculation of scale.)


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A Stickler For Stickers

| Right | August 7, 2012

(We are having a summer sale, and I am busy stickering a bunch of notebooks which are 50% off. Note: these stickers are merely to alert the customers of the discount; the items are automatically discounted when scanned at the till).

Customer: *picks up notebook* “Is this half off, too?”

Me: “Of course. All of these notebooks are.”

Customer: “What about these two?”

Me: “Yup, all of them!”

Customer: “Could you put a sticker on this one, then?”

Me: “It’s okay; it doesn’t need one. All our items are automatically reduced at the till. Is there anything else you need?”

Customer: *agitated* “Yeah, I want a sticker on this d*** notebook!”

Me: “Honestly, it’s an automatic system and it doesn’t need one.”

(The customer just stands there. I eventually lean over and place a sticker on the notebook. The customer’s attitude immediately improves.)

Customer: “Thank you very much!”

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