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She’s Not Getting The Massage

, | USA | Non-Dialogue, Popular

I work at a massage spa that also has a sauna. One day, two ladies come in and use the sauna together. After they’ve left, I find one of their phones while I am cleaning.

Since we have their numbers on file, I try calling one of the ladies, which rings the phone I have. I therefore call the second lady, who answers. I tell her to notify her friend that I have her phone. She agrees, and says she will tell her friend right away.

However, as soon as I hang up, her friend’s phone lights up with a text:

“the spa has your phone”

What part of “I have your friend’s phone” didn’t she understand?

 

Dear Readers. We realize that dialogue-driven stories are our bread and butter, but we thought we’d experiment with the occasional non-dialogue story. Let us know what you think in the comments!

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Making A New Disappointment

| Canada | Family & Kids, Health & Body

(This patient has missed two appointments back to back before this one. An hour before her appointment she gets her mother to call in sick for her. She’s in her mid 20s. We have a 24-hour cancellation policy that I waved for the first two missed appointments.)

Reception: “Due to policy, we will have to charge your daughter for this missed appointment.”

Customer’s Mom: “I CAN BRING HER IN TO SHOW JUST HOW SICK SHE IS.”

Reception: “I’m sorry but it is policy. You daughter missed two appointments in a row before this appointment. I’m sorry but there will be a charge.”

Customer’s Mom: “FINE! She’ll just never come back in then.”

(The mother is a regular of mine. And, just because you don’t come in doesn’t mean you can get out of paying.)

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Trying To Tip You Over The Edge

| NJ, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Popular

(I work at a popular spa, and we frequently get customers in to buy gift cards.)

Me: “Hi! Welcome to [Spa]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, yes, I want to buy a gift card for a prenatal massage. I have a $10 off coupon.”

Me: “Sure, no problem. So you now you just owe $64 instead of $74 since you gave me your coupon.”

Customer: “Okay, can I add tip onto there, too?”

Me: “Sure, no problem. How much could I put on here for you?”

Customer: “Better make it $20.”

(I ring her out, and charge her $64 for the gift card and another $20 for the pre-paid tip so now she owes a total of $84.)

Me: “Okay, great. Your total is $84. How would you like to pay for that?”

Customer: “Wait, why am I being charged $84? You just said the massage is only $64.”

Me: “Yes, but you added $20 on for tip, so that equals $84.”

Customer: “But the massage is $64.”

Me: “Yes. You added $20 for tip. All together that is $84.”

Customer: “But I gave you a coupon.”

Me: “Yes… which brought down the pre-natal massage total down to $64 instead of $74. You then added tip.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks.”

(She leaves. About ten minutes later, I see her walking back into my store:)

Customer: “Excuse me, I just bought this gift card for a pre-natal massage and I was charged $84 instead of $64, why?”

Me: “Yes… you added $20 tip.”

Customer: “But why was I charged $84?”

Me: “…You were charged $64 for the massage on the gift card, and then you added $20 onto the gift card as a pre-paid tip.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks.”

(She leaves again. About 20 minutes later, we get a call at the spa.)

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] at [Spa]. How may I help you?”

Same Customer: “Hi, I just bought a gift card from you guys and I bought it for $64. I just looked at my receipt and it says I was charged $84. Why?”

Me: *sighs*

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