We are in a pretty well-known chocolate store in a mall just browsing around while waiting for something to be made.

A lady, around fifty, walks in and the worker behind the counter offers her hand sanitizer due to the current health situation. I notice this lady is also not wearing a mask. She then starts to complain and go off at the worker stating.

Customer: “Ah, all you people with your hand sanitizer. Don’t you know how bad this is for your skin?”

I just turn around and do the dismissive hand gesture and continue browsing.

Customer: “Well, screw you, too.”

I don’t acknowledge this and continue browsing, at which point she shouts a little louder.

Customer: “Screw you, too!”

She stormed out the shop. I am sooo sorry that a little hand sanitizer is going to be bad for your skin.

I work for a pet food manufacturer. We make cat food sachets that are available in singles, a pack of six, or a multi-pack of twelve.

Me: “[My Name] speaking; how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. My cat only eats [specific flavor] of your multi-packs, but I couldn’t see it at the shop so I bought the wrong one that has [six other flavors] in, and my cat won’t eat half of it. What are you going to do for me?” 

Me: “You… intentionally bought the wrong food, knowing your cat wouldn’t like it?”

Customer: “No! No, I did not ‘intentionally’ buy it. I was forced, because you weren’t selling the multi-pack I wanted with the flavors I wanted!”

Me: “Well, couldn’t you buy the singles or even the six-pack?”

Customer: “You expect me to buy those? They are more expensive!”

Me: “All right… Well, in most cases we can’t do much — you have just told me you knowingly purchased the wrong food — but I will see what I can do for you.”

Customer: “I TOLD YOU, I DIDN’T ‘KNOWINGLY’ BUY ANYTHING! YOU FORCED ME, BECAUSE [Small, Obscure Shop out of the roughly 500,000 shops we supply to] DIDN’T HAVE [one specific flavor] FOOD! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!”

Me: “SIR! Sir, I am going to have to ask you to calm down. I understand your position, and I am going to speak with management to see if there is something we can do for you, like an exchange, but I need to clearly state that you intentionally bought the wrong food, and if this were to occur again in future, I would not be able to assist you, as this is not an error on our behalf where the packaging was mislabeled or the wrong product was packaged. You have received the correct product that you intended to purchase. Please, in future, do not do this again. I will contact you further once I receive the go-ahead from management.”

How is buying twelve sachets where half are wrong cheaper than buying six correct sachets? Luckily, I was in need of sachets for product giveaways, which was the only reason we were able to do an exchange. Also, he then said he had bought about five boxes, so that’s about thirty sachets that were “wrong” that he intentionally purchased.

I am covering reception as our receptionist has the morning off. I get a call from a woman. Our company name has a man’s name in it, and my coworker’s name is a very obvious man’s name.

Me: “[Company], [My Name] speaking; how can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I’m looking for [Company Male Name]?”

Me: “Uh… yes, that’s part of the name of our company, but who are you looking to speak with?”

Caller: “Oh! Uh…”

I hear the sound of some papers being shuffled around.

Caller: “Let me see if I can just find that name… [Coworker]?”

Me: “Oh, yes, [Coworker]. Unfortunately, he has just stepped into a meeting and will only be out in the next hour; would you like to call him then? I can let him know you called, so he will be expecting to hear from you.”

Caller: “Is that a man or a woman?”

Me: “Um, [Coworker] is a man.”

Caller: “Oh, great, so can I speak with him?” 

Me: “As I said, he’s just stepped into a meeting; you can call him in the next hour when he is available.”

Caller: “It’s just that he sent us a query, and it got redirected to my branch, and we do [certain work], and I’m the person that can help with this query, so I’m calling him to give him feedback.”

Me: “Yes, that’s fine, but he’s in a meeting; he will only be available in the next hour.”

Caller: “But he sent me this query and I’m supposed to speak with him, sooooo…”

I am getting frustrated as my incoming calls are backing up, and coworkers are standing at my desk waiting to ask me for assistance.

Me: “He. Is. In. A. Meeting! He will only be available in an hour. He is unavailable right now. I am unable to put you through, as he is in a meeting.”

Caller: “Ohhhhh, is he in a meeting? All right, I’ll call him back; when will he be done?”

This was the first call of the day; I was already exhausted.

I work at a factory that manufactures over a thousand products that are distributed throughout the country of South Africa to just about all the major and minor stores that are in the country.

We make it, it gets sold to distribution warehouses all over, the big stores order from them, and the small stores order from the big stores.

As you can guess, the variety of stock can vary in every store and branch, so it is impossible to know where one particular variant of a brand of product can be; we supply probably about 250,000 stores. This is a call we get regularly.

Customer: “Hi, I can’t find [specific variant] of this product; can you tell me where I can find it in [Very Small Suburb]?”

Me: “Hi, ma’am, we are sorry to hear that you are having difficulty finding this product. Can you tell me which stores you have looked at so far?”

Customer: “I only shop at [Small Mini Shop] that is down the road from me; it’s where I always shop. I haven’t looked elsewhere. Why can’t I find it?”

Me: *Pause* “All right, well, have you spoken to the store manager? They would be able to tell you if they have it listed, or if they have placed an order, or even if another branch has stock.”

Customer: “Oh, no, I haven’t taken it that far yet. I was at the shop today and I didn’t see it on the shelf, so I thought I’d call you and ask you, instead. So, where is it? Are you out of stock?”

Me: “Okay, I can see on our stock tracker that we have sufficient stock, so there shouldn’t be any shortage of stock on the shelf. Unfortunately, I cannot accurately advise on where [specific variant] is right now in your specific area. See, we don’t supply the stores directly; we supply the distribution warehouses in your region, and then the [Major Brand] head office places an order with them and that stock gets allocated to the majority of the [Major Brand] branches in your city. The variety of stock is dependent on their orders and it can vary from region to region. We would recommend looking at more than one store, or alternatively, speaking to the store manager, as they may be able to order the [specific variant] of the product that you are looking for.”

Customer: “Oh! So, you don’t just, have a list or something of where your stuff is sold? I guess I’ll speak to the store manager, then.”

I can’t understand how customers think we have a list of a thousand different products that are in all 250,000 stores in the country that we can just whip out.

This story is part of the South Africa Roundup!

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A customer places a can of soda on the counter.

Me: “Hi there! That’ll be [price].”

The customer pays.

Customer: “I have a cold! This soda is too cold! I can’t drink it! Put it in the microwave oven and warm it up for me! I can’t drink this; it’s too cold!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I won’t be able to do that, as it would be dangerous.”

Customer: “No! I insist! Warm it in the microwave! I want it warm!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, that would cause the can and the microwave to explode. If you want, I can run some hot water over it to warm it up a bit?”

Customer: “Never mind!” *Storms off*