Customer: “Can I have the [red wine]?”

Me: “Sure, I’ll bring it for you.”

I bring out the wine for her.

Customer: “Where is the bucket with ice that always comes with it?”

Me: “You mean the cooler? We only give that with white/rose wines as they have to be kept cold. Red wine has to be room temperature.”

Customer: “Well, they always bring me the cooler with any wine I order.”

Me: “As I said, we don’t serve the cooler together with the red wine, but if you wish to have one with red, there is no issue. Give me a sec, I will bring one to you right now.”

Customer: “You do that every time I come here!”

Me: “Well, they shouldn’t unless you specifically ask them beforehand.”

She continues arguing with me, getting ruder and more aggressive, not allowing me to present any solutions. As I am leaving the table, she shouts at me:

Customer: “You ALWAYS serve the cooler with every wine!”

Me: “No, we do not.”

Customer: “YES YOU DO! I COME HERE ALL THE TIME!”

Me: *Snapping and twisting on my heel towards her:* “AND I WORK HERE ALL THE TIME!”

I got her the d*** cooler for her red wine. The customer is always right in matters of taste, but d*** it, lady, let me help you!

I’m helping a guy look for something in our superstore.

Customer: “But your website says you have it!”

Me: “That’s a popular sale item. It’s likely they’re in someone’s cart in the store, and they haven’t been checked out yet. The online system can be delayed sometimes.”

Customer: *Grinning.* “What if I order it for curbside pickup?”

Me: “Yes, you can do that. However, if we can’t find it, the order will be rejected, and you won’t be charged.”

I’m about to tell him which nearby locations show the item as still in stock, and am even going to call them to ask them to confirm and hold one for him if they do, but then he says:

Customer: “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?! You’re enjoying my suffering!”

Me: “No, sir, but there isn’t some magical gotcha from ordering an out-of-stock item online. There’s no glitch in the matrix in the retail source code, I’m afraid.”

Unsatisfied with my answer, he demands a manager. The manager tries to explain the same things I’ve been explaining, but for much longer. After I’ve dealt with a few other customers, my manager is still there, half an hour later, re-explaining it to him.

Manager: *At the end of his rope.* “Sir! In the time it’s taken for us to ‘discuss’ this, you could have been arriving at our sister store that is still currently showing several in stock.”

Customer: “You wasted my time by making me come here, so now I’m wasting yours! Make me go away by bringing me what I wanted!”

Manager: *Snapping.* “It amazes me that you think saying that with that grin will suddenly make the item appear from thin air, and you could grab it while it floated in from the void and run off with it. We… are… done… here. If you talk to me or anyone else in this store about the item again, I’m trespassing you.”

Customer: “Fine, fine! Where is the other store that has it?”

Manager: “[Store Location], and like us, they close in fifteen minutes. Good night and good luck.”

My brother, Dad, and I were flying to Florida. I was thirteen. This was my first time flying, and I was really excited.

We got to the airport and went through TSA. Once we had all sat down and we were ready to leave, an announcement was made that due to unfortunate circumstances, the flight would be delayed about an hour.

While we were waiting, the lady at the gate was so kind and updated everyone as often as possible. We could see she was getting frustrated because everyone was asking for more information. My dad decided to thank her.

Dad: “Excuse me?”

Lady: *Snapping.* “What? I don’t know any more than I have already said!”

Dad: “I just wanted to say how awesome you have been.”

Lady: *Much softer.* “Thank you.”

I had brought paper and pencils with me because I like to draw, so we went back to our seats, and I made a thank-you card for her. When we boarded, I gave her the card, and she almost cried and hugged me. The flight went well after that.

It is unfortunate, but my city has a huge shoplifting/theft/petty crime issue. Mostly in part to the lovely government not wanting to punish repeat offenders, which leaves local businesses to suffer, despite years of complaints. Police are tired of them, too; it’s that bad. Relevant context for what I am about to share.

It’s early in the morning, I’ve just gotten my breakfast, and the store has barely been open. A man comes in; I give him a chipper as I can muster a greeting while he goes to the candy. After making a selection with a flourish or five, he walks up to the counter.

Customer: *Smiling.* “I’m taking this.”

Me: *Thinking I have a jokester on my hands.* “Okay, you’ll have to pay for it!”

Customer: *Shaking his head smugly.* “No.”

He was serious.

Now, we are a private, independent local business. We have given out freebies before to people in need, and who ask us nicely and with honesty. Neither of which just happened.

I’m tired, sick of all the theft, and recovering from bad congestion, so my patience meter is as short as an overly burned candle wick.

Me: “Then you don’t get it.”

The man turns to leave. I walk around the counter with all of the fury of a disappointed mother. I take the candy from him and put it back. He’s shocked that I defied him, mumbling something about me thinking he is a creep and other commentary. Hard to hear when your sinuses are committing to a strike blockade and blocking off part of your hearing.

What the man apparently doesn’t expect is for me to call out the door after him with an angrier yet disappointed mom tone.

Me: “There is a difference between asking for something nicely and saying you’re gonna take it!”

Customer: *Suddenly VERY meek.* “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

I return inside and resume my day. As I always say: kindness begets kindness, rudeness begets you the f*** out of my store.

I’m a flight attendant. I’ve been called to cover a last-minute shift. I’m going over the shift with the purser. I learn that the reason I’ve been called in is that a veteran flight attendant who has been in the industry for over thirty years is no longer available.

Me: “So I see that [Veteran Flight Attendant] worked the inbound. Why aren’t they available for the outbound?”

Purser: “They’ve been… uh… removed from rotation.”

Me: “Are they sick?”

Purser: “Look, I’m not supposed to tell you this, but they’ve been removed from the rotation for a while because they… well, they snapped at a passenger.”

Me: “What happened?”

Purser: “A passenger got upset that we’d run out of her meal choice. She was all the way down in Economy, and I could hear her from Business. [Veteran Flight Attendant] said to her, “Ma’am, I said we’ve run out of chicken, not fuel. Calm the f*** down.””

I laughed out loud at the line and then felt sad that a veteran flight attendant had finally snapped after thirty years. Happens to a lot of us.