(My uncle just bought a water heater with delivery and installation.)
Tech: “So, you see, over here are the three settings for heat. If you turn the dial this way, you will get low heat. To get more hot water, you just continue turning the dial until you get the heat you want.”
Uncle: “But what if I want cold water?”
Tech: “Uh, turn the heat off?”
(The gas station I work in rewards points for every liter of fuel, which can be used to redeem items in the store. The line goes down, so I can’t give anyone any points and have to instead stamp their receipts so they can redeem them at a later time.)
Me: “Sorry, the reward point line is down. I’ll stamp your receipt so you can get your points again when the line’s working.”
Customer: “I’ll lose the receipt.”
Me: *chuckles, assuming it’s a joke* “Sorry, I can’t really do anything else.”
Customer: “Yes, you can.”
Me: *blinks, half-chuckles, thinking it might still be a joke* “Um, okay. What?”
Customer: “Well, like not telling me you can’t do anything, for a start!” *stalks off*
Me: “…”
(I overhear my colleague talking about her day.)
Colleague: “I saw something and stopped, and suddenly something bumps into me from behind. It’s [Other Colleague]’s pregnant belly. But she didn’t even bother to say, ‘Excuse me,’ or let me know she was there. So, I hope she loses the baby, because it’s her fault for not letting me know she was behind me.”
Me: “What?”
Colleague: “Yeah! She just stood there waiting for me to bump into her, and she didn’t even bother to let me know she was behind me! It’s not my fault I bumped into her belly!”
Me: “But you’re the one who stopped suddenly.”
Colleague: “Yeah, but there’s something I wanted to look at.”
Me: “…”
Colleague: “Who asked her not to say, ‘Excuse me’? She should have let me know she was behind me. She didn’t even make a sound!”
Me: “Did she scold you or complain about you bumping into her?”
Colleague: “No, luckily. But she has no right to, because she didn’t say, ‘Excuse me.’”
Me: “And for that, you cursed her baby?!”
Colleague: “It’s her fault for not letting me know she was behind me! She should have said ‘excuse me’! She didn’t even bother to, so I hope she loses the baby, and it would serve her right!”
(I stopped talking to her after that; otherwise, I might have been tempted to give her a good slap across her face.)
(I overheard this story from my dad. He’s a manager at a construction site, and they are EXTREMELY sexist. There’s a lady engineer whom they all look down upon because she’s female. They always find small ways to ignore her and show their displeasure at having to “take orders from a girl.” They usually have to do inspections of the building at varying stages during construction, which entails a lot of climbing. At one point, there’s only a rickety plank, at least 30 stories above ground level. The building is still under construction, with scaffolding and only some supports and stuff — I don’t know the technical terms — and it’s pretty dangerous. Even the most macho, most sexist of the men have been known to be daunted. Now, I’m not sure if the lady engineer actually needed to be present at the inspection, but she made sure she turned up, anyway!)
Lady Engineer: “Okay, so, now we proceed to [other point].”
Construction Guy: “We will have to cross the plank.” *points to it in a silent challenge*
(The lady engineer proceeds to climb up in one easy movement, and walks quickly and unflinchingly across, in HEELS. The men are gawking, stunned out of their wits, in a cold sweat.)
Construction Guy: *quietly* “S***. Now we’ll have to do it, too.”
(The men took turns crossing with much swearing. They struggled not to flinch, either, but they were clumsier and not so good at it. The best part is, my dad later found out that there’s actually a less dangerous way of crossing, but they put the plank there to scare her off. Any one of them could have backed down and taken the easy way, but after seeing the lady seize the bull by the horns, not one of them dared to even suggest it!)
(I’ve been receiving spam calls from a beauty centre lately. When I try to get them to stop calling me, this conversation ensues.)
Caller: “Hi, is this [My Name]?”
Me: “Who is this?”
Caller: “I’m calling from [Beauty Centre]. You signed up for two free slimming sessions.”
Me: “No, I didn’t.”
(I definitely can’t afford it, so I’ve never signed up for any such treatments.)
Caller: *quickly changing tack* “Congratulations! You have won two free slimming sessions!”
Me: “Didn’t you just say I’d signed up for it? And now you say I’ve won it.”
Caller: “Yes, you signed up for it, so you won two free sessions.”
Me: “Thanks, but I don’t want it; please remove my name from your database.”
Caller: “But you won it.”
Me: “I don’t want it.”
(I’ve heard enough stories about these so-called free giveaways; you need to sign up for a thousand-dollar package to receive the free sessions, and they won’t let you leave until you do.)
Caller: “Then do you want to pass it to a friend?”
Me: “No, thanks. Just remove my name.”
Caller: “You have to pass it to a friend or take it yourself. Otherwise, we will still call you.”
Me: “I don’t want it, and I don’t want to give it to a friend. Just remove my name from your database.”
Caller: “I can’t do that; you have to take it or give it to a friend. Otherwise, we’ll still keep calling you.”
Me: “Let me get this straight. You want to give me two free sessions. But I don’t want it. So, you want me to give it to a friend, to whom you would have to give two free sessions, as well? But I don’t want to give it to my friend. So, you don’t have to give away free sessions. However, you’re still going to forcibly give me the two free sessions, failing which you’ll continue to call and harass me?”
Caller: “Yes.”
Me: “You want to give away your services for free that badly?”
