Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

No ID, No Idea, Part 32

, , , , , | Right | January 10, 2018

(I work as a security guard at a nightclub. A group of guys appearing to be tourists are all standing in line. They look fairly young.)

Me: *to the first guy in the line* “May I see your ID, please?”

Guy: “What? No, I left my passport back at the hotel.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but without a valid ID I can’t let you in.”

Guy: “I swear to you I turned 18 just last month. You have to believe me!”

Me: “I believe you.”

Guy: “YES!”

Me: “The age limit here is 20.”

Related:
No ID, No Idea, Part 31
No ID, No Idea, Part 30
No ID, No Idea, Part 29

Scanning For Politeness

, , , , | Working | January 5, 2018

(At my office, we recently had an unauthorized person get into a secure area, because somebody held the door open for them. As a result, we’ve been getting a series of emails and training videos about building security, and one thing that has been pounded into us in all of this is that EVERYONE has to scan a badge at a controlled entrance, every time, no exceptions, and if we see somebody follow an employee in without badging through, we need to alert security immediately. A week or two after that, I’m walking up to a secured exterior door after lunch, where a coworker who I do not know is just coming out.)

Coworker: *holds the door open for me, standing directly in front of the card reader*

Me: “Sorry, I need to scan in.”

Coworker: *doesn’t move*

Me: “EXCUSE ME. I need to get to the card reader.”

Coworker: “Huh! Well, I was just trying to be polite!”

Me: “…I know you were…”

(If I’d been an intruder, I could’ve just walked right in without a word!)

Will Make You Want To Hit The Bottle

, , , | Working | January 2, 2018

(I am with a couple of friends at a music festival for the weekend. We are in line to enter the arena, with security checking for alcohol. I have just bought a bottle of water that I haven’t opened yet. The guard motions for me to hand it to him.)

Me: “I just bought that so—”

(He untwists the top, breaks the seal, and throws out the entire contents, before crushing the bottle and trying to hand it back to me. I just stand there and stare at him. I can feel him poking me with it, hoping that I take it. He then gets the hint and the realisation is clear on his face.)

Guard: “That was a new bottle, wasn’t it?”

Me: “Yeah, I literally got it at the stall behind us not two minutes ago.”

(He bought a new bottle for me and apologised, which is more than can be said for some of the security there. I understand what you’re trying to do, but you have to at least pay enough attention to be aware of what you’re doing. You’re meant to be keeping us safe, not making us resent you at the same time.)

Needs A Badge Of Instructions

, , , | Right | December 28, 2017

(I have just checked an employee into the facility.)

Me: “Okay, to go to your safety presentation, you will use your badge on the reader by those double doors at the end of the lobby, pull them open, and go to your right, into the auditorium.”

Employee: “So, I have badge access to those doors?”

Me: “Yes. I verified that when I checked you in.”

Employee: “Great! See you later!”

(He walks to the doors, then stops. He looks at them, then back at me as if to say, “What do I do?” For the record, these doors also have signs stating to use your badge to get through.)

Me: “Use your badge on the reader.” *I point to the reader*

Employee: *looks at the doors, then the reader, then tugs the doors*

Me: “Use your badge!”

Employee: *comes back to me* “I don’t think I have access. Could you let me through?”

Me: “Sir, you have access. Just badge the reader before you try to open the door.”

Employee: *goes back to the doors, and tries to pull them open — without using his badge first, and looks back at me*

Me: “Use your badge!”

Employee: *badges door, but doesn’t pull on them, and looks at me*

(I gave up, pressed the button to let him through, and motioned to him to pull the doors. He still took a minute to figure it out.)

Making Boobs Of Themselves At The Entrance

, , , , , | Right | December 11, 2017

(I am with about ten other security guards, checking ID cards and tickets at the main entrance gate for an under-18s festival. This is my first day on the job, but for the most part, things run smoothly once we get into the swing of things. A group of four young women in their teens get to the front of my queue and hand me their tickets.)

Teen #1: “Here’s our tickets.”

Me: “I’ll also need to see your IDs.”

([Teen #1] removes her ID and presents it to me. After briefly comparing her ticket and ID I pass her through, where she waits for her friends. [Teen #2] then hands me her ID, but the photo has been completely scratched off.)

Me: “The photo on this card has been scratched off.”

Teen #2: “Yeah, it was a bad photo, so I got rid of it.”

Me: “You do realize I need photo ID to let you in? Do you have any other ID?”

([Teen #2] looks confused at the concept that a photo ID needs a photo, but then proceeds to try and give me her credit card, along with various other non-identifying cards, looking more and more dejected as she goes.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t accept any of these. I need a valid photo ID before I can let you in.”

Teen #2: *hopefully* “If I show you my boobs, will you let me in?”

Me: “Unfortunately, that’s not a form of photo ID, but I will call over my supervisor and see if he can sort this out.”

(I raised my arm to call over my current supervisor, who quickly arrived and asked me what the problem was. He was just as confused as I was at the lack of a discernible picture, but he took the group aside and talked to them. They ended up having to wait for about an hour outside the gate before someone came and gave them valid ID. Unfortunately, I lost count of the amount of times I had to deal with this exact same situation throughout the day.)