Not So Smart-Phone, Part 10

, , , , , | Right | November 20, 2017

(We work for an office supply store which also sells technology items for phones. My coworker is helping an older woman who has questions about micro-SD cards for phones.)

Customer: “Excuse me. I need a micro-SD card for my phone; can you help me?”

Coworker: “Sure! What kind of phone do you have?”

Customer: *thinking long and hard about it* “Um… It’s one of the cheapest plans.”

Coworker: “Okay, but what kind of phone is it?”

Customer: *really straining to think about this one, then a light seems to go off* “Oh! It’s a cell phone!” *big grin on her face*

Coworker: *struggling not to laugh* “Er… Do you have the phone with you?”

Customer: *opens purse* “OH, MY GOD! WHERE’S MY PHONE?!” *leaves the store in a hurry*

Your Team Works Silently

, , , , , , | Working | November 13, 2017

(I work in the bakery section of a national grocery store chain. As we’re technically understaffed, I’m one of only two closers on the payroll and work closing five or six days a week. This means I’m alone in the bakery from about 4:00 pm until I clean up and shut things down at around 8:00 pm. This takes place while my manager is packing up to leave for the day.)

Manager: “All right, [My Name], I’m out. You’re in charge.”

Me: *looks back at the empty bakery* “You hear that, team?!”

Manager: *starts laughing*

(He told me later that he was still chuckling about it on the way home. Good to know I have good quips sometimes.)

Unfiltered Story #92617

, , , , | Unfiltered | September 4, 2017

(I used to work at a small clothing boutique that also sold small gift items. One of our best sellers were key chain pepper spray cannisters that were bedazzled. I got many stupid questions about them such as, “Does this actually work?” “Have you tried it before?” “Well WHY haven’t you tried it?!?”. This conversation by far takes the cake on the stupidest customer I’ve ever dealt with.)

Customer: “These little cannisters are so cute! I wish they had perfume in it though.”
Me: “Oh yeah that would be cool. It’s always smart to carry pepper spray though!”
Customer: “Yeah but I wish it was perfume.. do you have any with perfume instead?”
Me: “Um.. no. Unfortunately not.”
Customer: “Well can I buy an empty cannister from you so I can fill it myself?”
Me: “Oh we don’t make it here. We are sent all of our items already packaged. I don’t have any empty ones.”
Customer: “Ugh fine. I’ll just empty it at home and refill it with perfume. My daughter loves spraying my perfume so I can give her this so she has her own! She just loves sparkles!”
Me: “I strongly advise you NOT to do that. You shouldn’t mess around with pepper spray canisters. You also don’t want to take the chance of not getting it all out resulting in your daughter hurting herself.”
Customer: “You don’t know what you’re talking about! You need to learn about your products more! I’m buying this for my daughter right now so she can have matching perfume with me!”