(I’m a 16-year-old male waiting for my order. Several employees–all of them guys, except for a single female, are working on it.)

Female Employee: *to male coworkers* “Chop, chop! Let’s get it moving back there!”

Male Coworkers: *rolling their eyes*

Female Employee: “Hurry it up with that salami!”

(After some time, the new salami is cut and the female employee begins wrapping my sandwich.)

Female Employee: “God, that took forever! It felt so good to finally shove some meat in there!”

(There’s a brief, awkward pause while I stand there silently. Finally, the female employee speaks up.)

Female Employee: “That’s what SHE said.”

Me: “Wait… but you’re a girl!”

Female Employee: “Does it really matter, hon?” *leans over the counter at me and licks her lips*

Me: *shocked silence*

(I’m putting the salad on a customer’s sandwich.)

Customer: “What’s that black thing on there?”

(I check to see if I’ve put olives on the sandwich by mistake.)

Me: “What black thing?”

Customer: “That big black thing right there!”

(I check again.)

Me: “Erm, that’s the shadow of my hand.”

Customer: “I don’t want that. Take it off!”

Me: *moves hand*

Customer: “That’s better.”

(Two coworkers and I are sitting around when a woman who appears to be approaching 60 years of age walks in. My newer coworker takes her order.)

Coworker: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, hi… I was wondering, how long is a footlong?”

(We all think she’s joking.)

Coworker: *holds hands up about a foot apart*

Customer: *still confused* “Hmm… okay… uh, can I see one?”

Customer: “Hi, I’d like your tuna jalapeño sub without the jalapeños.”

Me: “Okay, so you’d like a tuna sub?”

Customer: “No, I’d like a tuna jalapeño sub without the tuna!”

Me: “You want a veggie sub?”

Customer: “No, you’re not listening! Give me a tuna jalapeño sub without the jalapeños!”

(I just start making a tuna sub without saying another word.)

Me: “And what kind of veggies would you like?”

Customer: “Lettuce, tomato, and… hmm… how about jalapeños?

(At the sandwich shop I work at, pretty much all the meat is cold and we only heat it at the customer’s request. I am working the first position on the sandwich line, greeting people, and starting their sandwiches for them. An older customer comes up to the line.)

Me: “Hi there, welcome to [Store Name]. What can I get you today?”

Customer: “I’d like a sandwich, please.”

Me: “Sure! What would you like in it?”

Customer: “Cold meat.”

Me: “Ma’am, all the meat is cold. What meat would you like?”

Customer: “Cold meat. I already said that!”

Me: “Well, what type? We have ham, chicken, beef, turkey—”

Customer: “How hard is it for you to just put cold meat in my d*** sandwich? Are you new here?! They always put cold meat in my d*** sandwich! For f***’s sake, just put cold meat in my sandwich!”

Me: *speechless* “Okay, how about I get you the person who regularly serves you to help you out?”

Customer: “No! F*** it! You’re useless at this!” *leaves store grumbling*