Giving The Homeless A Fair Deal

| BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money

(I work in a popular sandwich shop on the main strip of our town. Every once in a while, we run certain deals.)

Me: “Hey there! What can I make for you this evening?”

Customer: “I want a foot-long ham. That’s part of the deal, right?”

Me: “No, just [sub #1], [sub #2], and [sub #3].”

Customer: “Okay. I’ll get a meatball.”

Me: “That’s not one of the deals.”

Customer: “It’s fine, whatever.”

(I should note that our town has quite a few homeless people. Most of them are quite friendly and always come in and buy things. One of the nicer ones is drinking a coffee at the front of the store. I finish making the sandwich and ring the guy in.)

Me: “So that’ll be [price].”

Customer: “WHAT!? I don’t want it if it’s not part of the deal! You told me it was part of the deal!”

Me: “I told you explicitly that it was not part of the deal.”

Customer: “Well I don’t even want it!”

(The customer drops the sandwich on the counter, and I turn to the regular homeless man.)

Me: “Hey [Name], you want a free meatball sub?”

Homeless Regular: “Heck yeah!”

(The customer grumbles about wanting free food, and scurries off.)

Bursting The American Bubble

| Knoxville, TN, USA | Bigotry, Geography, Language & Words

(There are two customers in line: the first customer is in her 20s, and the second customer is a middle-aged man. The first customer hands me her credit card.)

Me: “Ma’am, I need to see your ID.”

Customer #1: “Oh? Is that something new?”

Me: “Yeah, sorry for the inconvenience!”

Customer #1: “Oh, no! It’s totally fine. My driver’s license expired while I was in Reykjavik, though. I just got back; see. Will you take my passport?”

Me: “Oh, of course!”

(Customer #2 stomps up to us as Customer #1 is looking for it.)

Customer #2: “You mean to tell me that I’m having to stand in line and wait behind a foreigner? I’m an American! I demand you help me before helping her!”

(Customer #1 rolls her eyes and shows me her passport.)

Customer #1: “Will this work?”

Me: “Yeah, that’s fine.”

Customer #2: “No! Don’t help her! What country are you from, b****? Russia? Don’t help her! It’s people like her that are ruining this country!”

Customer #1: “Sir, I am an American. And even if I wasn’t, how dare you speak to me and this cashier in such a manner?”

Customer #2: “Liar! An American wouldn’t have a passport!”

Me: “Sir, if you’d looked at her passport, you’d see that it says USA all over it.”

Customer #2: *looks at Customer #1’s passport* “But… but that can’t be! She wouldn’t use a passport if she’s a native American!”

Me: “Right. She’s really from Italy; she just likes to draw random eagles all over her passport. Now where are you from, sir? I’m sure this lady would like to know, so she can be sure never to visit.”

(Customer #2 leaves in a huff, threatening to call the manager and corporate.)

Customer #1: *sighs* “Is your manager here?”

Me: “Oh, yeah. Do you need to talk to him?”

Customer #1: “Please.”

(I get the manager, and he and Customer #1 have a conversation. I go back to work. The manager comes back a few minutes later and drops a $20 in the tip jar.)

Me: “What is that?”

Manager: “From the customer I was talking to. She said she wanted to be sure you didn’t get in trouble for standing up for her and thought you deserved a tip.”

This One Cuts The Mustard

| USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink

(I overhear an exchange while doing prep work.)

Customer: “Can I get everything on it?”

Coworker: “Sure thing.”

Customer: “Oh, wait, I don’t want mustard.”

Coworker: “Oh, I’m sorry, I already put it on there.”

Customer: “Oh… it’s okay.”

Coworker: “Are you sure? We can absolutely make you another sandwich.”

Customer: “No, no, I’m the one who said I wanted it on there!”

Coworker: “I promise, sir; I’ll make you a mustard-free sandwich.”

Coworker: “No, don’t even worry about it, please. I’ll take it as-is. It’s entirely my fault.”

Coworker: “Okay, sir, if you promise it’s okay! I’m sorry there’s mustard on it!”

Customer: “Oh don’t be silly; I’m the one who should be sorry.”

(I turn and look at another worker who looks straight at me.)

Me: “That guy is the best guy in the entire world.”

Second Coworker: “Yes. Yes he is. I think he deserves a medal.”