Not Thinking Three-ly

, , , , , | Right | February 4, 2019

(I have worked in customer service for approximately five years, but this is my first year working fast food, and I have gotten quite a large number of customers who seem to lack basic intelligence, or at least simple math skills. Note: this happens AT LEAST three times a day. Every. Day.)

Me: “Hi! Welcome to [BBQ Store]. What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Hi. I’d like the [three-side meat plate] with brisket. How many sides do I get with that?”

Me: “You get three sides.”

Customer: “Three?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: *thinks for a minute* “All right I want [side #1] and [side #2].”

Me: “You get one more side.”

Customer: “I get another side?”

(I attempt to not roll my eyes. I assure the customer that, yes, you get three sides, and no, two sides do not equal three. Thankfully, it has happened enough times to where I can see the humor in it, and I tend to mime banging my head against the brick counter, much to the amusement of my coworkers.)

Unfiltered Story #136370

, , , | Unfiltered | January 12, 2019

In my department we often help people who have booked a room through a third party. *We can’t verify that they have a room. We have to direct them back to the third party.*

Me: Let me see if I can pull up your room. May I have your Last name, the name of the hotel, and the date of arrival.

Guest: My Last name is [last name] Its at the [Hotel] and I am coming in on the 25th

Me: Ok, so [First Name]?

Guest: Yes.

*I Open the reservation to see it is a third party booking. The lady has been nice so far, and honestly I am in a good mood. so I “Slip”*

Me: “Ok so I apologize because I will not be able to verify that you are coming into [hotel] for [dates] under [guest’s name]. Because you booked through [Third Party Dealer]

Me: “… Ma’am I-”

Guest: “No! Let me talk to your manager. You are useless.”
*I transferred her to my supervisor… I told him what I said and he laughed. From what he told me he did the same thing. and she got mad and called the third party.*

Unfiltered Story #136292

, , , | Unfiltered | January 8, 2019

<i>While working my normal shift, I’m dressed the same as I do every day, wearing store colors and my nametag, carrying a walkie and a scanner, and putting price stickers on items. I see a customer looking a bit lost.</i>

Me: “Hi! Can I help you find something?”

Customer: “I was just looking for someone who works here…”

Me: “Well, you’re in luck. What can I do for you?”

Customer: “Oh, you work here?”

Me: “…Yes. Yes I do.”

<i>That conversation repeated almost verbatim three more times that day…</i>

The Cat Sat On The Bat

, , , , , , | Working | January 7, 2019

(I work in a call center environment. We sit in cubes and I can hear everything around me, much to my coworkers’ dismay; I can catch them saying some pretty funny things, either to themselves or to clients. My coworker is trying to phonetically spell something over the phone to a client.)

Coworker: “That is C, like ‘cat,’ A, like ‘apple,’ N, like ‘knife’…”

Me: “That’s not how this works.”

Coworker: “Shut up with your bat hearing.”

Have A Heart (Attack)!

, , , , , | Healthy | December 22, 2018

(I work in a clinic that has regular patients who have treatment three times a week, sitting side by side each treatment. We are very short-handed today and I have the section where [Patient #1], who is very demanding, is located. She wants to get off treatment early, at 1:00. However, right before [Patient #1]’s turn, [Patient #2] begins to have a heart attack. As the rest of staff is on break, three other nurses and I immediately begin to perform CPR and attend him.)

Patient #1: “[My Name], are you still going to take me off treatment at one?”

Me: *obviously doing compressions* “Right now is not a good time; I’ll get to you when I can.”

Patient #1: “Well, could you get someone else to get me off treatment, then? Is it so important you need four people there? Where is everyone else?”

(The other nurses and I continue to perform CPR. As one nurse is talking to the 911 operator, [Patient #1] starts bothering the nurse.)

Patient #1: “[Nurse], can you take me off treatment? Hello? Are you listening to me?”

(She repeats herself, getting louder and louder each time, but we continue to tell her we’ll get to her when we can. Finally, paramedics arrive for [Patient #2]. After paramedics take [Patient #2], we are finally able to return to our other patients. All the other staff who were on break are returning now. I am finally able to get to [Patient #1].)

Patient #1: *two-faced* “Well, you sure know how to make me late! Is [Patient #2] okay? I was so worried about him! Did you know his kids were going to visit him this weekend?”

(She continued to tell me all his kids’ business as if nothing had happened. I quietly just took her off treatment because I was so disgusted someone could be so concerned with herself despite the fact that he could’ve died. Thankfully, he is doing well since we acted quickly.)