Will Make It Up To You

| Baltimore, MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I work for a popular makeup company that provides free ‘make-unders’ to clients for special occasions and events. I work in a full sized boutique. I have a client in for a homecoming look. She looks about 16. Her mother is there with her as well.)

Client: “This is such a cool job. I’d love to work here.”

Me: “Well, how old are you? You have to be 18 to work here.”

Client: “Darn! I’m 17 for another few months. So close.”

Mother: “Anyway, honey, you need to get a REAL job. You’re better than being a makeup counter girl.”

(I proceed to drop the brush I’m using because I was so surprised that someone would say that right in front of my face. Her daughter looked mortified and gave me an apologetic look. I go behind the counter and get an application.)

Me: “Here, fill out this application. I’ll put in a good word for you when you turn 18.”

A Whole New State Of Understanding

| PA, USA | Family & Kids, Geography

(I’m currently having a conversation with a little girl, about kindergarten age, while I do her nails.)

Little Girl: “You know, I’ve never been to the United States of America.”

Me: “Wait, what?”

Little Girl: “I’ve never been to the States. I wonder what it’s like there?”

Me: “You live in the United States, hun.”

Little Girl: “I do?”

Me: “Yes! You sure do!”

Little Girl: “Wow, I thought I lived in the city!”

The Return: Uncut

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

(I’m getting my hair trimmed. Beside me is a four-year old boy, who’s just finishing his own haircut.)

Boy: *scowling* “I don’t like my new haircut! Return it!”

Mother: “… Return it?”

Boy: “Yeah! You said that if I didn’t like my new haircut, that they could change it. Like when we changed my red shirt at [Clothing Store] for the green shirt! I want it back the way it was! Return it!”

(Luckily my haircut was finished. I left while the mother was trying to explain to the increasingly unhappy little boy the difference between an exchange and a change, and why they couldn’t return his haircut.)