Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Close Your Mouth, Open Your Ears

, , , , , , | Working | June 21, 2022

My late brother related this story to me many years ago. It was the mid-1980s, and all his children were still in school. He’d always wanted to get a set of that well-known encyclopedia and figured this would be a good time, since his kids would also make great use of them.

He contacted the company and they sent over a salesman. My brother was interested in buying the whole set all at once, as opposed to one or two volumes a month. He also was not interested in any kind of financing. He had some friends that had told him more or less what to expect and that he would save a decent amount of money by purchasing the entire set all at once. They warned him that the salesman would probably try to hide the true price behind all kinds of financing tricks and whatnot. He had at least a ballpark cost in mind, and he was prepared for any tactic the salesman would try to pull on him.

The salesman showed up and had brought a complete, brand-new set with him. He spent about twenty minutes showing all the features to my brother, his wife, and the kids. He also mentioned that this edition was the newest version that had just come out in the past couple of months, so my brother would be getting the newest version available, and that the next version would not be released for several years.

After the salesman completed his spiel, my brother asked him this simple question:

Brother: “Okay, I really like this encyclopedia and would like to get the whole set from you tonight. What is the price to buy the entire set from you right now?”

Salesman: “Well, we have payment plans starting at only $20.00 a month and—”

My brother interrupted him.

Brother: “I asked you for the price for the whole set, no financing or payment plans.”

Salesman: “Well, we have plans where you can buy just one volume per month—”

My brother interrupted again.

Brother: “That’s not what I asked you. How much is it to buy the whole set?”

Salesman: “We can do another type of plan, where you can purchase either two, three, or four volumes per month, and you’d pay around $20.00 a month, per volume, so you’d get the complete set much faster, with the payments then spread out over—”

My brother interrupted yet again, now really aggravated.

Brother: “What part of ‘What is the price of the entire set?’ do you not understand?”

Salesman: “Well, we have several payment plans that fit any budget.”

Brother: “Hold it right there. You are not listening to me. The next words out of your mouth will be the full price for the whole set, or you’ll be leaving my house.”

Salesman: “Well, it depends on several factors—”

My brother stood up with daggers shooting out of his eyes.

Brother: “Enough! Get out of my house right now!”

Salesman: “But Mr. [Brother], I haven’t finished explaining all your options and benefits.”

My brother led him to his front door.

Brother: “Oh, yes, you are done here. I told you the next words out of your mouth were to be the final, full price for the entire set, or you were leaving my house. You ignored my request, ignored every question I asked you about the final price, and were very evasive every time I asked about it. You are leaving my house, right now.”

At this point, my brother all but shoved the salesman out the front door and slammed the door behind him. He was so aggravated that he never bought the set nor even bothered to look into it ever again. 

The salesman lost an all but guaranteed sale, all because he wouldn’t listen. He was probably afraid that mentioning the full price would scare people away, but he lost a sale by not listening to a customer that was obviously prepared and willing to make a purchase on the spot.

It’s Not Rocket Sales, People

, , , , | Right | May 25, 2022

I work in a call center for a store. The store is running a promotion on a particular product. It’s resulted in some stupid questions.

Caller #1: “If [bottled item] is buy-one-get-one-free, how many do I have to buy to get a free bottle?”

And:

Caller #2: “If this is two for $10, how much money is four bottles?”

When I explained on multiple phone calls that the promotion makes it $5 each, they would ask if I was sure, and then they would check their calculators and state that they were impressed with my math.

Charity Is Only Okay If It Benefits ME

, , , , , | Working | April 19, 2022

A year or two after I graduated college, I was lucky enough to have gotten a pretty well-paying job but found myself not sure what to do with my new income. After spending pretty much my entire life scraping and saving to try to afford to make it through college, it had become such a habit that it now felt somehow decadent and wrong to actually spend the money I was earning!

To help get over that feeling of wasteful extravagance I got when I spent money on non-necessities, I had ironically opted to try tithing despite being an atheist. I figured if I gave 10% of my money to charity, I wouldn’t feel guilty about spending the rest on myself. In practice, I instead still kept pretty close to my starving college student lifestyle with the remaining income going toward first paying off the few student loans I’d had to take my last semester of college and then building up a sizable nest egg for emergencies. It turns out that cheapness is a hard habit to break!

One day, a teen came knocking on my door. I answered it and he immediately went on a spiel about how he was selling magazines for some company, and if I would purchase a subscription, some amount of it would go toward covering his college expenses.

Me: “I’m sorry, but I don’t really need or want any of these magazines.”

Teen: “But it would help me to pay for college. You could purchase something just to help.”

Me: “Yeah, I get that, and I want to help, but I donate all my charitable donations through [Charity Assessment Organization] because I know they will help ensure it’s used as efficiently as possible. Buying magazines isn’t exactly an efficient way of helping anyone, sorry.”

Teen: “Helping someone through college is definitely a good source of charity.”

Me: “But that’s not where most of the money goes. I bet you would get more out of me just handing you a dollar or two for your college fund now than if I got a subscription, and that would still be twenty dollars less for me since I’m not going to want to read any of these magazines anyway.”

Teen: “I’d be happy to accept direct donations to my college fund, as well!”

Me: “Then I wouldn’t have any way of making sure you used the money well for college. I’m sorry. I’d like to help, but I’m afraid I have to stick with known and proven charities for my donations so I know I’m getting the most out of them.”

Teen: “But if you—”

Me: *Interrupting a little* “I’m sorry, but the answer is no.”

Here, the teen got a furious look and snatched the book that listed all the magazines they sold out of my hand.

Teen: “Fine. Be selfish, you a**hole. I don’t need your help, anyway.”

He then somehow managed to slam the door on me while leaving my house. Apparently, giving a bunch of your money to save babies from dying of easily preventable diseases is selfish if you don’t also waste more of it buying things you don’t need or giving cash to a demanding teen and hoping he uses it well. I’m sorry for being such a selfish b*****d.

Listen Or Lose, Buddy

, , , , , | Working | April 19, 2022

My car died, and I had to replace it immediately as I needed it for work. I went to a dealership and told them I wanted a sub-compact.

Salesman: “Let me put you in a truck.”

Me: “I don’t want a truck. I need a car with good mileage for work.”

I asked about a particular model.

Salesman: “Let me put you in a truck.” 

Me: “I do not want a truck.”

Salesman: “Let me put you in a truck.”

Me: “I am going to buy a car today, but I’m going to buy it from somebody who will listen to me!”

There were two other salesmen watching us. I fully expected one to swoop in for a guaranteed commission, but they didn’t budge. I walked to the dealer next door and drove out in my new car.

And Away We Go

, , , | Right | April 18, 2022

I’m not always great at standing up for myself, and when stressed, my brain usually forgets how words are supposed to work. This time, however, it was mostly successful.

Someone knocks on my front door and I answer it to see a man in a suit with a piece of paper (not on a clipboard) and a pen. My two dogs are barking like crazy at the audacity of a human daring to approach the house, but they are behind a closed door to stop them from running into the road.

Man: “Hello, are you the homeowner?”

Me: “No.”

Man: “Is the homeowner in right now?”

Me: “Umm…”

My dad is in, but he’s asleep, but I could wake him up, but I shouldn’t because he works nights, but don’t we rent? Does that mean the homeowner is whoever the landlord is? I don’t know who or where they are.

Man: “Can you go get him for me?”

I’m still trying to figure out the answer to his previous question, and with no idea how to get all this information across, I decide I don’t want to talk to this random stranger anymore.

Me: “Can you go away, please?”

Man: *Surprised* “What?”

Me: “Umm, go away.”

I shut the door in his face and locked it, and I retreated to the living room to watch through the window to make sure he left. I heard him laugh at what had just happened, and he watched the house as he walked away. Once he was out of sight, I half-collapsed from the stress, which was helped very much by doggy cuddles.