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Mom Is Just Dye-ing For Payback

, , , , , , , , | Right | August 1, 2022

I was a cashier at a grocery store that had a little bit of everything. One of my coworkers was known to dye her hair crazy but very pretty colors. Encouraged by her confidence, I went and did the same. I chose a brand with the color “Violet Dream.” My mother, who worked as a personal shopper in this store, did the bleaching and dying herself.

I was getting compliments galore from our regulars and coworkers alike when I got a nasty woman in my line. This “lady” was known for complaining, especially about me, since I wore sunglasses for a medical condition.

Me: “Hello, Mrs. [Customer]. Find everything all right today?”

Customer: “Hmph!”

She loaded her items onto my belt without a word. I glanced at my bagger and let him know how she liked her items bagged as I began scanning. She only had about seven items, so she quickly got to my payment terminal. That’s when she finally looked up.

Customer: “What is wrong with you?”

Surprised, I looked up. I half-expected her to be making a statement about my glasses.

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “First, you wear those glasses, and now your hair? Your parents must be ashamed of you.”

This hit a bit of a sore spot, as I had just lost my dad recently in a car crash. At this point, I didn’t care if I got in trouble.

Me: “Well. Considering I just lost my dad to a drunk driver and my mom did my hair for me, I’m pretty sure they don’t mind. But if you want to ask, my mother is right over there.”

I pointed to my mom, who was printing labels for her bags. My customer just huffed, finished paying, and stormed off without her receipt. She never talked to my mom, who found the whole incident funny but told me to call her over next time so she could go Momma Bear Mode.

Whispering The Opposite Of Sweet Nothings

, , , , , | Healthy | July 12, 2022

I’m a nurse. I’m required to get my titers drawn, a physical, an eye test, and a hearing test as part of my pre-employment screening for a new out-of-state job. I’m sent to one of the local urgent care centers that handle these requests.

Everything is going well until we get to the hearing test. This is not a fancy hearing test, just a screening where the nurse faces the wall several feet away and whispers words for you to repeat back. 

Nurse: “Please cover your left ear and repeat the words I whisper.”

Me: “Ummm, that’s going to be a problem since I won’t have any idea you’re speaking when you do that. I’m deaf on my right side. It would be better to do the left first.”

Nurse: “This is part of the exam you must pass. Are you seriously claiming you can’t hear anything?”

It should be noted that my chart CLEARLY states that I am completely deaf on my right side. 

Me: “Yes, I’m deaf on the right side, and with a mask on and your back to me, I won’t be able to hear anything nor read your lips, so it’s rather pointless.”

Nurse: “Well, you have to pass it.”

Me: “Actually, I don’t. It’s noted in my medical record and I have an ADA accommodation already in place. Trying to tell me I have to pass isn’t true. Please just finish the test for the left side and send the doctor in.”

I covered my left ear and stared at the wall until she turned back around, all huffy, because guess what? I couldn’t hear her tell me to switch ears, either! Duh! I passed the left side with no problem.

The doctor came in and said we were all done. She asked if there was anything else I needed and was happy to give me a form letter regarding my latex allergy. She was rather confuzzled by the nurse’s declaration regarding my hearing, or lack thereof, and stated that, of course, that’s not a test you have to pass to get a job as a nurse… especially if it’s already known and documented.

They Lost The Waiting Game

, , , , , | Right | February 11, 2022

I am on vacation visiting my family and we decided to eat at a grill and bar. It’s an early Sunday morning so the bar is closed.

There is a couple sitting in a booth way back in the corner by the bar, where no one else is seated. I only notice them when I get lost trying to find the bathroom. I am confused by them because they have no menu, drink, food, or anything and are sitting in silence. Once my family gets our food, the wife walks up to our waitress.

Wife: “How are they getting their food when we haven’t even gotten our drinks yet?!”

Waitress: “Oh, sorry, ma’am, what did you order? I’ll go get them for you and find your server.”

Wife: “WE HAVEN’T EVEN GOT THE CHANCE TO ORDER OUR DRINKS! We haven’t seen our server in ages!”

Waitress: “Oh, no, I am so sorry! Who was your server?”

Wife: “Some short blonde with a ponytail.”

Waitress: “Ma’am, she clocked out ages ago. She told us there was no one left in her section. We had no idea you were here, I apologize.” *Pulls out an order pad* “I can take your order back right now and expedite it.”

Wife: *Still red in the face and mad* “I’m getting a [breakfast item #1] and my husband would like a [breakfast item #2]. And I’m not paying for either of those.”

Waitress: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but breakfast ended at 11:00. It’s past 12:00 now; all the breakfast ingredients have been put away. Would you like to look at the menu again and I’ll come back to you?”

Wife: “That doesn’t matter. We got here at 10:30; we were on time!”

I am beyond annoyed now, so I decide to be a little passive-aggressive.

Me: *In a loud “whisper” to my family* “Wow, you would think someone would have enough sense to go and find someone if they were sitting for an hour and a half!”

Wife: *Flustered* “Well, well… Go get us a lunch menu and we’ll let you take our order when we’re ready!” *Stomps off*

Waitress: *Turns to us* “I’m so sorry about that.”

Me: “It’s not your fault she’s a bat.”

Sister: “Yeah, she’s being ridiculous.”

Waitress: “Thank you.”

She seems genuinely shaken up by the whole thing. I think it’s all over with until I can hear the woman shouting from across the restaurant.

Wife: “…AND I HOPE YOU KNOW I’M CALLING THE OWNER ABOUT YOU! TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE SERVICE! YOU IGNORED US FOR HOURS! YOU WOULDN’T FILL OUR ORDER BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T FEEL LIKE MAKING IT! I SWEAR, IF YOUR MANAGER WAS HERE…”

On and on and on. I am not a confrontational person, but I still feel the need to do something. I get a piece of paper and a pen from my mom’s purse and write a full report on what happened.

Our server had no way of knowing they were there; it was the other server’s fault for not telling anyone she sat them, and they were probably just sniffing for a discount because they intentionally waited as long as possible to find a server. I talk about how well our waitress handled the situation and how she is much more patient than I. I sign it and add my email address. I see the waitress coming back, looking near tears.

Me: “Miss, here.” *Hands her the paper* “I’m your witness if they try and complain about you.”

My family claimed that was very “extra” and unnecessary, but as someone who’s worked in the service industry, I wish someone would’ve done this for me.

Breast Not To Make Assumptions

, , , , , | Learning | September 4, 2021

My cousin used to work as a nursery school teacher. Her own son was one of the students in her class, and when he was about one year old, a parent wandered by the classroom, where my cousin happened to be breastfeeding her son at that moment. [Parent] looked around the room of maybe a dozen or so infants, confused.

Parent: “Do you… do that for all of the babies?”

My cousin had a good laugh about the parent’s misconception that part of her teaching duties included personally breastfeeding all of the babies.

Radiating Stupidity

, , , , | Right | January 29, 2021

I answer the phone.

Me: “Hello, [Bookstore].”

Caller: “Yeah, do y’all sell steam radiators?”

Me: “I’m sorry. What?!”

Caller: “Steam radiators.”

Me: “No, sir, we’re a bookstore.”

Caller: “Do y’all know where I could find one?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. I don’t.”

Caller: “Oh. Well, can y’all order one for me?”

Me: “No. Again, sir, we’re a bookstore.”

Caller: “Aw, man. All right…” *Hangs up*