Customer: “Hello, can you get someone to make copies for me?”
Me: “I can make copies for you, ma’am! What would you like copied?”
Customer: *stares at me for several seconds*
Me: “Ma’am?”
Customer: *keeps staring silently*
Me: “What would you like copied, ma’am?”
Customer: “OH! You want me to GIVE you the documents?!”
(A customer approaches me on the sales floor.)
Customer: “Hi…um…where are your Mi-cro-softs?”
Me: “Sorry, my Microsofts? Microsoft is a company.”
Customer: “Yeah. It’s on my list here, but I can’t find it in your store.”
Me: “Actually, they make a lot of stuff.”
Customer: “Yeah. Show me everything…”
(I proceed to go through everything Microsoft I can think of, including keyboards, mice, Word, Publisher, Excel, Powerpoint, operating systems, some basic card games, and clip art collections. We go back and forth, and eventually, I show her Windows 7 and Office disks. In the end, she left the store without purchasing anything.)
(We have just landed. One of the passengers has suffered a medical emergency. Paramedics are on the way, and we’ve asked the other passengers to wait until the man has been safely moved from the plane. One of the other passengers speaks up.)
Passenger #1: “What is this? Why can’t we get off?”
Me: “Sir, one of the passengers has just had a heart attack. We need to get him off the plane before everyone else.”
Passenger #1: “This is s***! Why should we have to wait? I want to get off!”
Me: “I’m sorry, sir. You’re going to have to wait like everyone else until we’ve taken care of the emergency.”
Passenger #1: “Let us get off!”
(Another passenger speaks up.)
Passenger #2: “Hey! This man just had a heart attack! His life is in danger. Are you really so selfish that you can’t wait five minutes for him to get medical attention? I hope that if you ever have a heart attack on a plane, they don’t wait for you to receive medical attention. Let’s see how that works out for you.”
(The man sheepishly sits down.)
This story is part of the Entitled Customers roundup!
Read the next Entitled Customers roundup story!
Read the Entitled Customers roundup!
This story is part of our Terrible Airline Passengers roundup!
Read the next Terrible Airline Passengers roundup story!
Read the Terrible Airline Passengers roundup!
(I am helping a customer scan and email important documents to his insurance company. He speaks English very poorly.)
Me: “Okay, sir. The email is sending now. It will just take a moment. There! Sent!”
Customer: “Is sent?”
Me: “Yes. Your agent should get the email any second now.”
Customer: “Oh! Am so happy! Happy like SQUIRREL!”
This story is part of our Foreign Languages roundup!
Read the next Foreign Languages roundup story.
Read the Foreign Languages roundup!
