Russian Right Over To The Globe Store

, , , , , | Working | January 8, 2021

I will start by saying that I realize I was a jerk to the fraud agent that I spoke to in this story. My brain-to-mouth filter broke when she revealed herself to be extra stupid.

I travel quite frequently — every six months or so — back and forth from New York to Russia where some of my family lives, and I always put a travel advisory on my account prior to travel.

I use my credit card in a supermarket in Moscow. I then try to use it to buy something from another store and it doesn’t go through. I look at my bank’s app to find that my card is frozen. I call the bank and speak to the fraud department.

Fraud Agent: “We froze your card because it was used in an unknown location.” 

Me: “Oh, really? Where?”

Fraud Agent: “Moscow.”

Me: “Uh, don’t I have a travel advisory on my account?”

Fraud Agent: “Well, yes, but that was for Russia, not Moscow.”

I stared at my phone for a minute wondering if someone could possibly be this stupid.

Me: “Uh, Moscow is in Russia. Now please unfreeze my card.”

Fraud Agent: “Oh, we can’t do that. Once it’s frozen due to fraud, we have to send you a new card.”

I lose it. I definitely am THAT customer.

Me: “Let me get this straight. You’re a moron who doesn’t realize that Moscow is the capital of Russia, which I have a travel advisory for, and have had a travel advisory for every six months for the past ten years I’ve had the card, so you froze the card because you can’t read a f****** map? Now you are telling me you have to send me a new card, even though I am out of the country and obviously won’t get it until I get home two weeks from now?”

She speaks in a sweet way like what I just said made perfect sense.

Fraud Agent: “That’s right. Anything else I can help you with?”

Me: “Uh, yes, you can transfer me to your manager and buy yourself a globe.”

The supervisor was able to unfreeze the card and cancel the new card, and they apologized for the issue. I feel bad that I lost it on the fraud agent, but I seriously could not believe that she was that dumb. What’s worse, there are actually two people in the fraud department that need geography lessons: the one who froze the card in the first place and the woman who answered the phone.

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Okay… Fine

, , , , | Right | August 11, 2020

It’s required to wear facemasks indoors in any shop in the city, not only ours, but people are stubborn in their beliefs. One day, I accidentally invent a fun way to spare myself some nerves on fighting those people; it mostly works to this day.

Me: “I’m sorry, but we’re not allowed to serve anyone without a facemask.”

Customer: “Afraid, huh? Afraid of me infecting you?”

Me: “No, I’m not. But it’s a requirement not only from our management but from our government itself.”

Customer: “You know it’s all fake, right? Facemasks won’t protect you from anything!”

Me: “Actually, facemasks will 100% protect you from being fined.”

Customer: *Laughing* “Okay, you convinced me!”

This story is part of our Anti-Masker roundup.

Read the next Anti-Masker roundup story!

Read the Anti-Masker roundup!

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Unfiltered Story #199865

, , , | Unfiltered | July 3, 2020

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. How can I help you?”
Customer: “We are flying from [City in Russia] to Amsterdam. Is it, like, in Holland?”
Me:”Yes, it is”
Customer: “Then we are going to the Hague. I heard it is, like, in the Netherlands. We have to get a visa to the Netherlands, right?”
Me: “Exactly”
Customer: “Won’t we have problems with arriving in Holland on the Netherlands visa? I know it’s all Shengen, but my friend once wasn’t allowed entering Germany because he had a Spanish visa ”
Me: “Umm… Holland and the Netherlands are the same country. Just different names”
Customer: “I understand, but… are you sure border guards let me go from Holland to the Netherlands?”
Me (sigh): “I’m 100% sure there’s no border between the two.

(Finally, I schedule an appointment with the Embassy for her and send her a confirmation letter from their site. She calls back after that)

Customer: “Are you trying to fool me? I can read English! Your letter says I am going to Deutsch Embassy! I want a visa to the Netherlands, not to Germany!”
Me: “Deutsch? Do you mean Dutch?”
Customer : “So… Am I going to the Embassy of Denmark?”

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Unfiltered Story #192459

, | Unfiltered | April 25, 2020

One day there was a middle-aged lady going through the security checking, during which she never stopped a hurricane of critical comments mainly aimed at our, TSA agents’, appearance – how we shouldn’t walk this fast, move this slow, talk this loud (“You think, I’m deaf yet, girl?!”), wear heels this high or mascara this bright… In the end, when the lady was over with her checking, one of the agents offered her to apply for the position of our staff manager, if she was so eager to discipline the workers.

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Unfiltered Story #192285

, | Unfiltered | April 21, 2020

(I’m a customer in this story. I’m standing in the line and witnessing the dialogue between the store manager and a very angry – and extraordinary dressed – customer. Note: 5000 roubles is the biggest bank note in Russia, still accepted anywhere after the compulsory checking if it’s not fake)

Customer: I was here yesterday, tried to pay with 5000-roubles note and your cashier did NOT take my money!
Manager: Well, as you paid with such a big note, she had to check it in a special machine. The machine probably showed red light, so the cashier gave the note back to you. It doesn’t mean that it’s fake, but we can’t accept it. These are our rules, you know.
Customer: Ridiculous! I got it from ATM! It must be real!
Manager: Sure you did. But if the cashier’s machine said…
Customer: And that day I came in another shop and you know what? They accepted it! How do you explain this?!
Manager: Well, I’m not responsible for that shop… Maybe they have another machine. Still, what do you want from me now?
Customer: Fire your cashier!
Manager: What for? She’s just doing her job! She has to check the note and if the machine shows red light, she declines your note. So she did.
Customer: Fix your machine then! It must be broken!
Manager: No, it’s not. It must have been something with your note. It’s happening from time to time, sorry to tell it…
Customer: Impossible! I got it from ATM!
Manager: So. What do YOU want? To complain? I can’t prevent you do this. Or you can call the police, if you like. Or…
Customer: No! No! Your machine doesn’t work! Fix it! It doesn’t work!
(stroms out, repeatedly crying last phrase)

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