Dear readers,

Today is Mickey Mouse’s birthday! That’s right, the world’s most famous mouse first appeared on screens in Steamboat Willie on this day in 1928. He became synonymous with the Disney brand, and now he has been warming hearts and defeating the Heartless for almost a century.

In honor of this auspicious occasion, we’re celebrating with 11 warm and fuzzy stories from our archives about Mickey and his friends and the happiest and most magical places on earth!

Keeping Manners Fast Effective – In this roundup, even the customers are magical!

Flee Or Flea – Hits from the comments: “I love the way children look at the world through such unfiltered eyes. God bless ’em… every one of ’em.”

It’s A Small, Small World, But Not That Small – Awww. This kid has a great attitude.

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Dear readers,

Today is National Homemade Bread Day! Is there anything more satisfying than kneading a big heap of dough, watching it rise, and rewarding yourself for your patience with a thick slice of warm, fresh bread with a generous smear of butter?

If you’ve been reading our site for any length of time, you know that making homemade bread is a little more complicated than some of our story subjects can handle. So, to celebrate homemade bread day, here are 13 stories from our archives about people who left the baking of bread to the professionals… and still managed to find a way to struggle.

At least we’re on-brand, right?

Sometimes They Travel In Packs – We’d like to introduce you to the “idiot tax.”

They’re An Idiot, No Matter How You Slice It – Hits from the comments: “A bag of slices? This is the best thing since itself!”

Breaking Bread With Bad Customers, Part 2 – The answer is clearly sourdough. Duh.

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Dear readers,

That little old lady shopping for her groceries, or that sweet old man feeding ducks in the park – they’re harmless, right? Wrong! Some old people reach an age where they realize they don’t give a fudge and can say whatever they want! Others prefer to remind you that, just because they are old, it doesn’t mean they always were. They had quite the colorful life, and likely still do!

We’ve rounded up eleven stories from our archives about old people saying the most shocking and unexpected things! Be prepared to be offended!

Be Glad She Didn’t Ask For Cream – Are you sure you know what that word means?

Would You Like French Resistance Fries With That? – Hits from the comments: “If they don’t come from Frankfurt, they’re actually sparkling weiners.”

More Slippage – These adult parodies are really getting out of control.

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Dear readers,

Yesterday was National Pickle Day! Full disclosure: this particular editor hates pickles. I hate their texture, I hate their smell, and I hate their taste. Theoretically, pickling was invented as a way to preserve food when you lacked refrigeration. We have fridges now! Why do people insist on continuing to pickle things?!

Apparently, there are lots of people out there who actually like pickles. Well, my pickle-loving friends, you are more than welcome to them and all their vinegary glory. In honor of all of you weirdos out there, here are ten stories about people in pickle-related pickles!

In A Pretty Pickle – Who’d’ve thunk that such a delightful thing as a cucumber could become something so gross?

Putting Themselves Into A Bit Of A Pickle – Dive right into that briny deep.

Got Yourself Into A Bit Of An Unhygienic Pickle – That’s the only thing pickles are good for.

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Dear readers,

Today is World Diabetes Day! Diabetes is a medical condition where your blood sugar levels are too high, and it affects over 400 million people worldwide! Today is a day to educate yourself about prevention and treatment, and to honor the doctors and nurses who help make life easier for people with diabetes.

But hey. We’re not doctors. We’re editors! Our specialty is finding you great stories about stupid people, mean people, and confused people. So here are ten stories we’ve pulled from our archives about those people and how they respond when faced with diabetic people! Enjoy… people!

What A Diabeetus, Part 2 – This person is so wrong in so many ways.

Projecting A Sales Career – This kid has a great future ahead of her.

Pancakes Can Cure All – What a good boss! Also, I really want pancakes now.

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