Dog Days of Summer 2019

| Right | August 16, 2019

Did you know that the term Dog Days of Summer has nothing to do with pet dogs, but with the appearance of Sirius, aka The Dog Star, in the summer night sky?

Okay, trivia time over!  It’s time for a roundup all about our faithful furry friends.  These aren’t shaggy dog stories, just dog tales from folks like you.

It’s Not Your Imagination — A little boy has an inspired loophole!

My Dog Thinks You’re Nuts — Canine Comeuppance at its finest.

The Puppy Is Cat-ching On — Nature or Nuture?  Who cares? It’s all good!

Dog-Gone Cruelty Will Make Your Dogs Gone — No dogs were seriously hurt, but maybe the owner should have been…

Going Bananas — When you’re getting health advice about your dog, don’t go monkeying around.

Dogged With Complaints — Just because your dogs are special doesn’t mean you are special.

Their Bark Is Worse Than Any Dog’s Bite — Further proof that some humans just don’t deserve dogs.

Hat’s Off To The Dog’s Eating Habits — What goes in, must go, er, out.

You Have To Be Howling Mad To Work Here — Admit it. You’ve done the same.

Sheep Dogs Aren’t Sheepish — Please research your critters before you decide on one!

All Bark, No Bite — No. Means. NO.

Man’s Best Friend, From Beginning To End — Warning: This beautiful story comes with sliced onions.

 

If you missed it, our previous Cats Roundup is here, and we’ll be doing another pets roundup in the future!

Did we miss your favorite NotAlwaysRight story about dogs?  Do you have a story of your own?  Tell us all about it in the comments below or submit it to us here!

 

Monthly Roundup: July 2019

| Right | August 12, 2019

It’s time for the July roundup! Our editors have decided among themselves which stories in July deserve the extra attention, regardless of the number of thumbs-ups they received. Out of all the stories we posted in the month, we’ve singled out thirteen.

If there are any stories from the last month you feel we should have included, please let us know in the comments!

Don’t forget to vote for your favorite stories in the poll below! Note: You can choose up to three*. 

The winner of last month’s poll was This Will Make You Sto-Mad, in the Healthy category!

 

The Silence Of The Fans – We don’t know why this story is so popular, as every time we check it there’s nothing there…

Sandwich Hero Saves The Day – Sandwich Hero in another epic battle against the Joy-Thief!

Mind Your Own Cookies – Meet the REAL Cookie Monster.

That Story Took A Turn – You’re never too old to realize you’re an awful human being.

Bright Green With Envy – Jealousy comes in many colors.

She Will Shake Away The World – This kid came here from a higher dimension.

What A Complete A**-perger – When managers forget you have HR’s phone number.

Nailed It! – A story with a “happy” ending.

Time To Vacate The Classroom – Including this story in the roundup is NOT an act of charity.

A Gender-Fluid Household – Sometimes boys will just be girls…

The Key To Progress – Being a misogynist must require a lot of patience.

You Don’t Read That In The Magazines Every Day! – Technically the driver is correct, she wasn’t texting!

Been Waiting 25 Years To Say That – Good things can come from all that waiting.

 

Please choose your favorite story of the month!

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*Not Always Hopeless stories are not included in the poll. This is because often they are so lovely they win by default. 

We’ve decided to separate our favorite ‘Hopeless’ story of the month from the section above, since it’s not part of the poll:

Breaking Bread Daily – How to offer charity in a dignified way.

Monthly Roundup: June 2019

| Right | July 8, 2019

It’s time for the June roundup! Our editors have decided among themselves which stories in June deserve the extra attention, regardless of the number of thumbs-ups they received. Out of tall the stories we posted in the month, we’ve singled out ten.

If there are any stories from the last month you feel we should have included, please let us know in the comments!

Don’t forget to vote for your favorite stories in the poll below! Note: You can choose up to three*. 

The winner of last month’s poll was Ultimatum Results In Ultimate Victory, in the Working category!

 

The Cashier Would Like To Have A Word With You – Working retail makes you lose… uhm… how to… uh… word.

Spilled The Ink On That One – Not to sound like clickbait, but the last sentence will make you gasp.

Standing Up By Sitting Down – Respect your elders, until they disrespect you.

Oh, Shoot, I Forgot My ID! – You brought entitlement to a gun fight.

Starting A New Hire Fire – Some people are just unemployable.

The Mother Of All Perfect Comebacks – What a total motherteacher!

Give A Pizza A Good Home – No pizza has ever tasted better.

This Will Make You Sto-Mad – See what happens when those who work in healthcare don’t know the meaning of either health or care.

This Relationship Sounds Exhausting But Really Sweet – This is a story about love and chickens.

So Tire-d Of These Stereotypes – No longer burdened by the weight of sexism.

 

Please choose your favorite story of the month!

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*Not Always Hopeless stories are not included in the poll. This is because often they are so lovely they win by default. 

We’ve decided to separate our favorite ‘Hopeless’ story of the month from the section above, since it’s not part of the poll:

The Breast Service Possible – Customer service is more than just making a sale.

Happy Fourth Of July!

| Right | July 4, 2019

Dear readers, all of us here at Not Always Right would like to wish our readers from the United States, a very happy Fourth Of July!

To celebrate this Independence Day, here is a small roundup of stories where some might not realize that today is not celebrated in other parts of the world…

 

Leap Days Of Logic

Call Center | Ontario, Canada

(The call center is in Canada, but we have many customers from the USA. This call comes in toward the end of the day on July 4th.)

Caller: “So, did you have a good Fourth of July?”

Me: “Well, I’m in Canada, so it’s just a regular day here, but it was not bad. We do have Canada Day, which is July 1st.”

Caller: *confused* “So… then… is today July 3rd for you, or July 5th?”

 

Trying To Encourage Independent Thought

Gift Shop | Paradise Island, The Bahamas

(I’m decorating our storefront for Independence Day, which is July 10th. In 1973 we gained independence from Britain, though we are still part of the British Commonwealth. The glass doors are decorated with American colours for July 4th and the whole front of the store is decorated with Bahamian colours for July 10th. An American tourist walks up with her husband.)

Tourist: “Miss! You’ve got the date wrong, and why are you using those colours?”

Me: “Oh, yes, ma’am. Bahamian Independence Day is the 10th. These are the colours of the Bahamian flag. I’ve decorated the front door with red, white, and blue for Americans like yourself!”

Tourist: *looks puzzled for a moment* “But Independence Day is on the 4th…”

Me: “Yes ma’am, in the US it is, but here it’s the 10th.”

Tourist: “But it’s July…”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. A strange coincidence that they are both in July, isn’t it?”

Tourist: *finally looking resolved* “No! This isn’t right; you should have the right date and colours like every other state, even if you’re on an island!”

Me: “But we aren’t a state… We aren’t even part of your countr—”

Tourist: “State, member, province, whatever, that is no excuse to act un-American! Darn islanders…” *she walks off as her husband glares at me over his shoulder*

 

Independent From Your Day

Tourist Attraction | Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

(Vancouver sees a lot of American tourists. Just like American businesses, we are concerned about counterfeit bills, so typically $50 and $100, US or Canadian, are rarely accepted and there are signs to this effect. This story takes place on a July 4. Exchange rates [generally quite unfavorable] are posted in case they use USD.)

Box Office Box Office Attendant: “Your total is $25 for 2 tickets.”

Customer: “Can you break this $100(USD)?”

Box Office Attendant: “I’m sorry; sir, but we cannot accept bills of that denomination. Do you have anything smaller?”

Customer: “No, and no one takes them. What can I do?”

Box Office Attendant: “You could take it to a bank and exchange it for Canadian.”

Customer: “How? Banks are closed today.”

Box Office Attendant: “Why would they be closed?”

Customer: “It’s a holiday!”

Box Office Attendant: “July 4th is not a holiday in Canada, sir. Today is a regular weekday.”

Customer: “I can’t believe you don’t celebrate Independence Day! Why don’t you?”

Box Office Attendant: “That’s your holiday; we have Canada Day on July 1. Banks are closed that day.”

Customer: “It would be lot easier if you followed our holidays.”

Box Office Attendant: “We’ll keep that in mind. Perhaps you have a credit card?”

 

The War Of 1812 Revisited

Supermarket | Canada

Me: “Have a good day, sir.”

Old Man: “Thank you. Is your family doing anything for the 4th of July?”

Me: “Not really. We’re Canadian so we may hold a BBQ on July 1st, which is Canada Day.”

Old Man: “WHAT? You’re not American? I thought all foreigners had to become American when they came to this country!”

Me: “No, sir, my family all has green cards, so we’re all still Canadian citizens.”

Old Man: “I’M SICK OF ALL YOU F****** ILLEGAL ALIENS TAKING ALL OUR F****** JOBS! AN AMERICAN BOY SHOULD HAVE YOUR JOB!”

 


For all the customer service employees out there who have to work on the holiday, we wish you luck and patient customers from all here at Not Always Right! Of course, if you do end up with some awful customers, you know where to send those!

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Canada Day, 2019

| Right | July 1, 2019

Oh, Canada! Sometimes we don’t appreciate you enough.

In celebration of Canada Day, we give you stories of folks — and not just from the USA — who can’t seem to figure out where Canada is or why it exists… or maybe even how it exists.

 

Personally, I Prefer Stars And Polkadots — It’s a flag, not a decoration!

Canada, America’s Baseball Cap — We promise that Canada Day is a real holiday with no pretending going on.

Yukon Spend It — It’s almost like other countries do things differently.

Independent From Your Day — What do you call July 4 in Canadian?

Canada, America’s Hat (Part 7) — See? It’s not just the Americans who don’t understand Canada!

Yukon Freeze It — How big is your igloo?

Leap Days Of Logic — Canada: Large enough to move the calendar.

Sorry, I Canada Understand You — Even outside the US, Canada remains a mystery.

 

Happy Canada Day! Have you experienced people who don’t grasp the whats or wheres of Canada?  Do you have stories of those who don’t understand our grand neighbor to the north?  Tell us about them in the comments or submit your story here and we might use it!