Dear readers,
Today is “Talk Like William Shakespeare Day”! (It’s also “Talk Like William Shatner Day”, but we don’t have as many stories on that subject…) If adding “-eth” to the end of everything and tossing “thee” and “thou” in everywhere isn’t doing it for you, try some Shakespearean insults! “His wit’s as thick as a Tewkesbury mustard” is nicely scathing, while “I am sick when I do look on thee” is pleasantly blunt!
In honor of this auspicious occasion, we’ve rounded up thirteen stories from the Not Always Right archives about struggles with Shakespeare – including a few that might need some of those insults thrown their way… Enjoyest thineselves!
Where For Art Thou, Intelligence? – Well… at least they’ve heard of him.
It’s Very Difficult To Kill A Caesar – Hits from the comments: “So, the corpse was corpsing?” (Credit: Gray)
Thy Drugs Are Quick – Shakespeare can inspire all sorts of… interesting conversations…
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Dear readers,
Examples of flawed customer logic abound, from the most common and annoying “If it doesn’t scan, it must be free!” to the ultimate flawed argument of them all, “The customer is always right!” However, there are hundreds of examples where customer logic was so warped, so far removed from reality, that we just had to call them out in this roundup!
Here, for your reading pleasure, are thirteen stories from the Not Always Right archives about “customer logic” and how flawed it can get:
Your Logic Is See-Through – Their head is mostly full of bubbles.
Can’t Play That Card With Me – At least someone knows how to logic around here.
Honey, I Shrunk The Brain – Are you mistaking your nightstand for your radiator or something?
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Dear readers,
“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet.” So sayeth Juliet in Shakespeare’s Romeo And Juliet. Everyone has a name, and it’s usually one of the first things we learn. Occasionally, those names get us into trouble. We’re not talking about when a mother pulls out the fullest length of their child’s name in anger, having discovered their disobedience. We’re talking about people who struggle to spell, pronounce, or appreciate others’ names.
Today, we’ve dug into the Not Always Right archives for 15 stories about people playing the “Name Game” and losing spectacularly!
Time To Exterminate That Joke – The next person to make that joke is gonna get John Hurt.
A Strange Complaint, To Name A Few – As far as weird names go, this one ranks low.
You Are My Sunshine, My Only Sunshine – This is just dang cute.
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Dear readers,
Sure, customers stressed out in a retail environment can cause some moody behavior, but then there are those who change their moods so wildly that you’d think they changed their entire personality. So, for all the workers out there who have had to deal with customers with a Jekyll/Hyde complex, we hope you enjoy these fourteen stories from the Not Always Right archives!
We hope you don’t suffer a 180-degree personality reversal after reading these!
Going From Positive To Negative – Sooooo, we’re guessing she didn’t submit that compliment letter?
Pros And Con(artists) – When coupons are involved, privacy worries go out the window.
Dr. Jekyll And Mrs. Hyde – We really feel for that representative who emailed the author at the end.
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Dear readers,
These days, just about everyone has a cell phone of some kind. In fact, one source I found says there are now more mobile subscriptions than there are people in the world! Cell phones have basically become an integral part of everyday life. Whether you’re checking your bank account, ordering dinner, video-calling your mom, or just killing time crushing some candies, it feels like there’s nothing these little magic technology rectangles can’t do.
All of that being said… time and place, right? Cell phones are awesome tools for communicating with people all over the world, but sometimes we let them come between us and the people standing right in front of us. Today, we’ve rounded up 15 stories from the Not Always Right archives about people who need to learn when to put their phones down!
Respect Is Learned Before It Is Earned – Whose job was it to teach “kids these days” how to behave?
Confusing Coordinating With Subordinating – Coordinating what, [Coworker]? Coordinating what?!
Stretch The Rules And Your Librarian Might Snap – Creative solutions and desperate measures… and we are here for it!
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