This Christmas I Gift You A Virus

, , , , , | Right | December 21, 2020

I work at a Christian store that sells Bibles, gifts, apparel, and education supplies. This happens right before Christmas with a very crowded store. I’m helping a couple pick out a train set for their two young children who are playing nearby with a train we have set up.

Mom: “Are these pieces compatible with other train sets?”

Me: “I’m not sure. They should be.”

Mom: “I have some of the pieces in our car. Do you mind if I take one of these pieces from the table and compare it to ours?”

Me: “Not at all.”

The mom takes a train track piece out to their car and is gone for about five minutes. In that time, the dad starts talking to me about how his kids have been sick, they’ve been giving them breathing treatments, they have 102-degree fevers at that moment. I try to sound sympathetic as I inch slowly away from them.

Me: “Oh, no, that’s awful. Poor things.” 

The mom returned, saying the piece fit. They picked out a train set and went to check out. I ended up disinfecting that whole area.

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Scratch That Customer Complaint

, , , , , | Right | December 19, 2020

I work in a deli in a grocery store. A customer comes up to the sub counter and orders two unusual subs: baloney and provolone. But that’s not the weird part of the story.

Coworker: “All right, I can make those subs for you.”

Customer: “Actually, can you get the other person to do it?”

That other person is me. My coworker is taken aback by this but agrees. As I’m making the subs:

Customer: “How would you like it if I scratched my a** and make you a sandwich?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Because that’s what [Coworker] did.”

This time, I am taken aback. I was watching [Coworker] the entire time and not once did I see her do that. Rather than argue, I apologized and finished her order. When I spoke to [Coworker] about it, she was slightly embarrassed but swore she never did so. We never saw that customer again.

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On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 21

, , , , , | Right | December 17, 2020

It’s late March and we’re early in the first wave of the health crisis. As such, no safety features are in place yet, meaning we have no masks, gloves, or separators on the tills yet.

I’m standing at my till serving a customer who suddenly sneezes right up in my face. I stand there, shocked, while the customer just looks at me.

Customer: “Oh, it’s okay. I don’t have it. I was cleared two weeks ago.”

Related:
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 20
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 19
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 18
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 17
On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 16

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That Is A Big Gelato-No-No

, , , , , | Right | December 8, 2020

I work at a local, small-batch gelato place. During a fairly busy evening, a man comes up to the counter and orders a small gelato. While I’m scooping it for him, he says the following:

Customer: “I bet there’s a whole bunch of air in the bottom of that cup.”

Me: “Sorry?”

Customer: “It’s a money-making scheme. You probably just coat gelato over the top of the bowl and leave a whole bunch of air in the bottom.”

Me: “Actually, we use flat spatulas to scoop the gelato so that it fills up the entire cup.”

The man ignores what I say and proceeds to reach over the glass and grab the cup from my hands as I’m scooping it. He then uses his tasting spoon — used — to scoop all of the gelato out of the cup and onto the glass. He holds up the now empty cup.

Customer: “See? There’s nothing in there.”

Definitely one of my worst customer interactions.

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Who The H*** Raised You?!

, , , , | Friendly | December 4, 2020

Back in my university days, I have three extremely immature housemates. The worst part about living with them is them constantly throwing tantrums, or worse, breaking things. For example, one day, I come home to find them randomly punching holes in a bedroom door because “it’s funny!” We are clearly on our landlord’s bad list and there is little chance of getting any deposit back.

One morning, I come downstairs to the living room and see a huge greasy stain on the wall. Instantly, I’m confused as to why the h*** that is there. One of my housemates is there watching TV, so I decide to ask.

Me: “Err… why is there a huge stain on the wall?”

Housemate: “Oh, yeah, I bought a burger last night and I didn’t like it, so I threw it at the wall!”

Sadly, I’m not shocked by this, as they are literally so immature that this has become normal behaviour.

Me: “Why didn’t you just throw it in the bin?”

Housemate: “Because I didn’t like it!”

Me: “Really? That’s your excuse? The bin is literally two metres away. You couldn’t have thrown it away like a normal person?”

Housemate: “I DIDN’T LIKE IT!”

At this point, I gave up having any kind of rational discussion with him and just walked away. Thankfully, I’m not in contact with a single one of them anymore. Also, no, we didn’t get our deposit back!

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