(This story takes place on a Sunday in Texas, where the state law forbids stores from selling any form of alcohol before noon on Sunday. I am running the register around 10:30 am when I see a group of 20- to 25-year-old guys approaching with a few cases of beer, coolers, and the related.)

Me: *without even touching the beer* “I’m sorry, but I cannot sell you that right now.”

Customer #1: “Why not?! We’re all of age!”

Me: “State law prevents us from selling alcohol be—”

Customer #2: *shoving his ID in my face* “But we are all of age!”

Me: “Age is no issue; it’s before noon on a Sunday, and sta—”

Customer #1: “What the f***?! Just ring us up already!”

Me: “If I could, I would. However, sta—”

Customer #3: “Just get your manager if you’re too young to sell it, then!”

Me: “I am 22 years old, but it makes no difference. I cannot sell you beer be—”

(All of them start to try to make a scene. Giving up and trying a different route, I try to scan one of the cases of beer, knowing that the register will block it.)

Register: “SALE PROHIBITED 1:00 AM TO 12:00 PM SUNDAYS.”

Customer #1: “FINALLY YOU LISTEN TO ME!”

Me: “No, sir. I scanned one of them to show you that I cannot sell it. Please re—”

Customer #1: *rattles off his birthday without showing me his ID*

Me: “I’m not asking for your age. Please re—”

Customer #2: “F*** this! We’ll just get it from down the road!”

Me: “Good lu—”

Customer #1: “F*** YOU!”

(The group leaves, dropping one of the cases on the counter, causing it to explode and spray EVERYWHERE, including on me, before running off. With a sigh, I start to get some paper towels only to have a manager that saw everything approach.)

Manager: *as he’s helping me clean* “Today the Cowboys and Texans are playing, just to let you know… and it’s a noon game.”

Me: “Crap, that means we’re going to be going through this all morning.”

Manager: “You want to take a break? I’ll clean this up and we’ll mark down some new clothes so you don’t smell like beer all day.”

(Sure enough, during the 90 minutes from this ordeal to noon, I had similar encounters turning away about five or more people wanting to get drinks for their game day parties and gatherings. Thankfully, nothing near as bad as that first group.)

(I work at a home and kitchen supply store.)

Customer: “Excuse me, can I see your flexible cutting boards?”

Me: “Sure!” *I hand her one of our flex boards* “This side with the grid is the grip side, and you cut on the other side, right here.”

Customer: “But that’ll get cut up. There will be marks on it.”

Me: “Well, it is a cutting board.”

Customer: “But there will be knife marks all over it. It will get all marked up!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but the boards are designed to be cut on. There may be some marks on the board after use, but you’re not going to cut through it, and it’s designed to protect both your knife and your countertops.”

Customer: *turns to leave* “No, I don’t want one of those! There will be knife marks! It will get cut up!”

(I work in a well-known retail store. This particular night, I am overseeing seven departments, checking out customers at my register, and answering the phone. I’m in the middle of finishing a transaction with a couple and miss a phone call. After they leave, the phone rings again. I answer it on the first ring.)

Me: “Thank you for calling your [Location] [Store]. How may I help you?”

Customer: *very sarcastically* “I know you must be very busy for 11:30 pm on a Wednesday, but this is the second time I’ve called. You couldn’t bother to answer the phone the first time?!”

Me: *as politely as possible* “Sir, I am so very sorry it took so long for me to answer the phone; we are very short-staffed tonight, and I was with a customer.”

Customer: “That’s no excuse!”

Me: “Sir, I really am very sorry. I am in charge of helping customers in seven departments, running a register, and answering the phone.”

Customer: “Oh, you guys really get that busy at night?”

Me: “Yes.”

(The rest of the phone call was him trying to find an item on our online store that he had asked to be set aside for him… for twenty minutes.)

(I typically work the closing shift of a major retailer. When the store closes for business, the graveyard shift comes in. Being that they are graveyard workers, they do not have uniforms, nor do I necessarily know them all too well.)

Me: “Hey, man, I’m going home now, so can you lock the door once I leave?”

Guy: “Uh, yeah, sure.”

(I leave through the side exit, and I watch him turn the latch. The following day, my manager has a word with me.)

Manager: “[My Name], when you leave for the night, you’re supposed to tell a staff member to lock the door behind you. You can’t just leave without telling anyone.”

Me: “That’s not what I did. I asked one of the graveyard shift guys to do that for me.”

Manager: “Yeah, about that…”

(Turns out that wasn’t a graveyard shift worker. I had actually asked a customer who happened to be in the store afterhours to lock the door for me!)

(A manager from another store has called us to arrange a transfer of some sewing machines. She said the customer needs them urgently and that she would come over to pick them up in the afternoon. We also have a visit from our national manager around the same time. He sees the transfers waiting for collection.)

National Manager: “I’m going to [Store location] in the morning. I could take those with me now.”

Me: “[Manager] is on her way to collect them now. She has customers waiting for them this afternoon.”

(Oddly, the manager arrives close to closing time to pick them up. The next morning I get a phone call from the national manager, asking if the machines had been picked up.)

Me: “Yes, late yesterday, just before we closed. I had her sign our copy of the transfer.”

National Manager: “You’re sure about that?”

Me: “Yes.”

National Manager: “Okay, thanks. I’ll have to get back to you.”

(Later I find out that the national manager had noticed that there were no machines at the other store and that none had been sold. He asked the other manager, who denied that she had picked them up. She didn’t know that he had remote access to our CCTV and it clearly showed her collecting the machines. They discovered that she had done this for other transfers at different stores as well. She would wait a few weeks and call to say the items hadn’t arrived and then have the transfer cancelled. And she had swapped the signed copy for her unsigned copy when I was helping her carry the machines out. Thank goodness for cameras; otherwise it might have been me charged with theft.)