(I am out shopping in a clothing store find four items I like. I decide to buy them and even make small talk with [Cashier #1] — and [Cashier #2] who is right next to her — as she completes the sale. On my way out, the alarm goes off and the security girl finds that [Cashier #1] forgot to remove one of the security tags from a shirt. As I have worked as a cashier, I know how easily something like this can happen, and go back so they can remove it.)

Me: “Hey, you forgot to take the safety tag off one of my items.” *smiling, presenting both my bag of purchases and my receipt*

Cashier #1: *without looking at my receipt* “Yeah, that happened because you never paid me for that.”

Me: “Actually, I did, about two minutes ago. You can also scan the item and my receipt to make sure.”

Cashier #1: “No, I remember you.”

Me: *thinking she actually remembered on her own* “So, how about getting the tag so I can go?” *still smiling*

Cashier #1: “I remember you. You never paid for this. Now give it back before I call the police on you for stealing!”

Me: *starting to feel embarrassed, as she accused me of stealing in a shop full of people* “Could you just take one look at my receipt? I paid for all my purchases; you were the one who rang me up!”

Cashier #2: “She is right, [Cashier #1]; you rang up that shirt. I was right next to you and I saw her paying.”

Cashier #1: “No, she didn’t! What are you trying to do, [Cashier #2]? Help her steal? I bet that everything she wears is either stolen or secondhand!”

(I am kind of underdressed today, wearing jeans and a hoodie. I usually wear business clothes, but I am just out to run some errands.)

Cashier #2: “[Cashier #1]! You can’t say that! And you can’t be rude to our customers! Now take a look at her receipt and remove the d*** tag!”

Cashier #1: “NO! SHE IS A THIEF! SHE STOLE THIS SHIRT!”

(The manager appears to see why there is yelling at the checkout lines.)

Manager: “What is the matter here?”

Cashier #1: *smirking* “No big deal. This b**** tried to steal a shirt and wasn’t happy that I stopped her!”

Me: *already crying from embarrassment* “I never stole anything! You accused me, insulted me, and refused to look at my receipt!”

Cashier #2: “It’s true, [Manager]. The lady has paid for her shirt; I can confirm that.”

Manager: “Miss, may I see you receipt, please?”

Me: “Yes.” *hand over receipt and bag* “You can also check I don’t have another one in there.”

(The manager checks the bag, the receipt, and the shirt.)

Manager: *probably trying to smooth out the situation* “Well, it seems like there was a misunderstanding. I am terribly sorry about all this. [Cashier #1], this lady has paid for all her purchases, just the cashier who rang her up forgot to take off this tag. You should always check the receipt before making accusations! Now, miss, do you remember who your cashier was? I must remind her to double-check for tags.”

Me: “Yes, it was [Cashier #1].”

Manager: *furious now* “Please let me get this straight, [Cashier #1]. You rang her up and you forgot to remove a tag. And when she came back, you accused her of stealing the item and insulted her. Is this true?”

Cashier #1: “I… erm… Well, look at her! She looks like a d*** [Romani slur]!”

Manager: “[Cashier #1]! OFFICE! NOW! Miss, we are terribly sorry for all this.”

Me: “I accept your apologies, but can I ask you for a favour, sir?”

Manager: “Of course!”

Me: “Could you make out a gift card to [Cashier #2]? Honestly, she is your best cashier. She stood up for me to [Cashier #1], and got yelled at by [Cashier #1] for me. I really want to thank her.”

Manager: “Of course, miss!”

(I never saw [Cashier #1] there again, but I see [Cashier #2] when I shop there and she recently got promoted to manager!)

(I’m legally disabled due to chronic illness, and I walk with a cane. I also find it funny when people behave awkwardly because of it. I’m standing behind the counter when a middle-aged woman walks in and comes up to the register.)

Customer: “I want three bags of [Cat Litter].”

Me: *smiling* “Not a problem!”

(The customer demands that I single-handedly deliver 120 pounds — 54.4 kilos — 100 feet from the shelf to the register. I step out from behind the counter and she spots my cane. Her demeanor changes entirely.)

Customer: *awkwardly* “Oh, actually, I can get it myself.”

Me: *cheerfully* “Nonsense! I’m happy to help!”

(At this point, I’m too far away for her to object so she stands there waiting. I come back struggling with the first bag.)

Customer: *sounding stressed* “Really, I don’t mind.”

Me: *still smiling* “It’s all right!”

(She stands there uncomfortably while I fetch the other two bags. By the time I reach the register to check her out I’m in a lot of pain but still smiling from ear to ear.)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Customer: *rushes out of the store*

(I was bedridden the day after, but I still enjoy watching entitled customers get hit with guilt when they discover the lowly retail worker they were bossing around is disabled!)

(A customer comes into the store with some returns from an online purchase. No receipt, no order number, nothing. She says her mother ordered it online for Christmas and didn’t give her a receipt. My manager says she can do an exchange. We inspect the packaging, and it is packaging from the manufacturer, not our store.)

Me: “Ma’am, we cannot accept these returns. These weren’t purchased from our website; they were purchased from [Manufacturer].”

Customer: “No, they weren’t. My mother said that she ordered them from you guys.”

Me: “Well, ma’am, that just simply isn’t true. We can’t accept these because they were never in our system.”

Customer: “Are you saying that my mother is a liar?”

Me: “No, of course not. I was just stating that she was incorrect about where she purchased these.”

Customer: “My mother is a registered nurse! I think she has enough intelligence to know where she bought something from! I feel insulted!”

Me: “Well, you have the right to feel insulted, but that doesn’t change the fact that these were not purchased from us.”

Customer: “I demand to speak to your manager!”

(Our manager comes over and repeats everything I said. The customer then angrily grabs everything and storms out of the store.)

Me: “Have a nice day, ma’am! I hope you get a better nurse.”

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 35
Refunder Blunder, Part 34
Refunder Blunder, Part 33

(We have a table marked 50% off different items. A woman approaches me.)

Customer: “Excuse me. This is regularly $7.00; how much is it on sale for?”

Me: “It’s 50% off; everything on this table is discounted half-off.”

Customer: “So, this is $14.00; how much is this half-off?”

Me: “That would be $7.00.”

Customer: “And what if it’s $10?”

Me: *pause* “Five.”

Customer: “This one is $4, so how much is that?”

Me: *longer pause* “Two.”

This story is part of our Pi Day Math roundup!

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(Where I work, regular employees have supervisor status if they are working as openers or closers. I come in to work one morning to find the regular opener is gone, and the fill-in opener flustered.)

Me: “What’s wrong?”

Opener: “[Coworker] called. She tried to call out!”

Me: “Shoot, we’re really short-staffed this week. Is she sick?”

Opener: “Nope! She said because it was Friday and we had less work to do on Fridays, that she just didn’t feel like coming to work today!”

Me: “Is she coming in?”

Opener: “She better. I reminded her that we’re short-staffed and that, ‘I don’t feel like it,’ is not a good reason to leave your coworkers in the lurch.”

(Our coworker did show up, though it wasn’t the first time she’d tried to call out with that same reason. Unsurprisingly, when payday rolled around, she seemed to forget that working meant getting paid, and complained when her paycheck is smaller.)