Fur-bal Abuse

| NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

(I work in an outlet of a very high-end retail store. Most customers are looking to save a little money on expensive clothing and shoes, but some people don’t understand the concept of “outlet.” I am working in the coat section.)

Customer: “Excuse me, do you work here?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, how can I help you?”

(She holds up a $500 coat.)

Customer: “Why is everything here so cheap? Where are your good fur coats?”

Me: *indicating the rack with furs on it* “All our furs are right here, ma’am. Are you looking for a particular designer?”

Customer: *wrinkling her nose* “No, these are too cheap looking. Where are the GOOD furs?”

Me: “All our furs are here, ma’am.”

Customer: “Ugh, why don’t you have any by [High End Designer]. I can get them at [Main Store in NYC]; why don’t you carry them?”

Me: “Well, we are an outlet and we don’t always carry the same brands. People come here expecting to save money so we don’t always have the most expensive things. ”

Customer: “That is ridiculous! I came here to find a specific coat and you don’t even HAVE it. All you have is this cheap s***!”

(She managed to push a rack of $600 coats onto the floor and stomped on them while I frantically radioed for a manager. She screamed about our store being cheap until she was escorted out by security. She damaged nearly $10,000 worth of merchandise.)

Your Counting Skills Are Week

| NJ, USA | Holidays, Time

(I work for a men’s clothing store that also rents tuxedo formal wear. If a customer rents a product less than a week from their event date there is an extra rush charge added on to the order, similar to that of an expedited shipped online order. The rental product is not kept on premises and is shipped to the store, and so we have to follow certain time frames for both the product being put together and UPS delivery schedules. A mother, grandmother, and two kids walk into the store on a Saturday afternoon.)

Me: “Hello, how may I help you today?”

Mother: “Yes, I would like to rent a tux for my son, for Halloween.”

Me: “Perfect. We have a wide selection of options to pick from. The pricing of the rental ranges from [price #1] to [price #2], depending on which one you pick out. But I just want to let you know there is also a [price #3] additional rush charge fee since Halloween is less than a week away.”

Mother: *rolls eyes* “Ugh! Really? We’ve rented from here before; is that really necessary?”

Me: “Well, I do apologize, but Halloween is this coming Friday which is less than a week from today.”

Grandmother: *cuts me off* “No, that’s not right.”

Me: “Ma’am, today is Saturday. A week from today is next Saturday. This coming Friday is Halloween, which is six days from today.”

Grandmother: “No, you’re confused!”

Me: “The rental is for Halloween right? This coming Friday?”

Mother: “Yes.”

(I count in front of them on hands, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday… etc. until I get to Friday which is six days.)

Grandmother: “You’re counting wrong!”

Mother: “This is ridiculous that you are trying to charge us extra for no reason.”

(At that point I was beyond frustrated with them and with trying to prove that Halloween was in fact six days from that day and that falls under seven-days for the rental rush charge. The family proceeded to leave the store and didn’t come back.)

Stayaway From Layaway

| Terre Haute, IN, USA | Money

(I work in the layaway department at a superstore. Late one evening, I’m cleaning the counter and a coworker from the electronics department shows up with three PS4s and tells me some customers are coming to put them in layaway. About twenty minutes after he leaves, three college guys walk up to the counter and tell me they’re putting the PS4s on layaway, but they have a question first.)

Guy #1: “I have a question about the layaway.”

Me: “Okay, what is it?”

Guy #1: “How much do we have to pay on these to take them home today?”

Me: “The full amount.”

Guy #2: “So, if we pay $30…”

Me: “…they stay here in the store until you pay the remaining balance. We keep them locked up, so I can assure you they’ll be safe.”

Guy #3: *to the two others* “Man, that girl in electronics said we could pay the $30 and take them home!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but that isn’t how layaway works. You pay ten percent of the total cost and we store them for you. Once you pay them off, you can take them home.”

Guy #1: “So you don’t have like a payment plan or…?”

Me: “No. You can make payments as often as you like, but like I said, you can’t take them home until the full price has been paid.”

Guy #2: “Why not?”

Me: “Because that’s stealing.”

Guy #3: “So you’re saying we should get them at [Video Game Chain] for less?”

(At this point I’ve realized that there isn’t much going on in these guys’ heads, but I still attempt to explain that layaway allows you to spread out payments as opposed to paying a huge chunk of change all at once. Throughout my explanation they’ve been giving me blank stares.)

Guy #1: “All right, we’re just gonna go to [Video Game Chain].”

Me: “Okay, then. Have a good night.”

Guy #3: *as they’re leaving the layaway department* “I wonder how much [Video Game Chain] will charge us to take them home tonight…”

Me: *head-desk*

The Wrong Color And Attitude

| Emeryville, CA, USA | Crazy Requests

(I work at a well-known company that sells cosmetics, skincare, fragrance, and hair products. This takes place at cash wrap. The client has a new canister of colored hairspray in hand, and had just dumped out a bag of trash — receipts, used tissues, used sponges, and a used hairspray canister — onto my counter.)

Client: “I’m exchanging this root concealer for that one there.”

Me: “Sure thing. Was there something wrong with the product?”

Client: “It was the wrong color! It’s black! I’ve spent forty thousand dollars on this same f****** color for years and I only found out today they have it in light brown! Why have you people never told me it comes in light brown?!”

Me: “Well, we do have testers so you can check the color… but I’m happy to exchange it for you. May I see the old canister?” *I test the nozzle* “Ma’am, this canister is empty…”

Client: “It was the wrong f****** color! I had to rub it into my head and mix it with foundation powder to get it to the right color!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that, but if it was the wrong color when you first got the product, you could have brought it back to us before using the entire canister. You’re asking me to give you a free can of root concealer so we can recycle your old can for you.”

Client: “But I’ve spent forty thousand dollars on this same f****** color!”

Me: “Ma’am, let me try this another way: would you ever go to a deli, pick up a pre-wrapped and clearly labelled turkey sandwich, eat the entire sandwich, then bring the empty wrapper to the guy at the counter and demand a new sandwich and a refund because you’d rather have chicken?”

Client: “Who would do that?! That’d be ridiculous!”

Me: “I’m sorry… but I can’t exchange your empty canister for a new one.”

Client: “But it was the wrong f****** color!”

(This went on for a good ten minutes. She left muttering “Forty thousand dollars!” with all of her trash still on my counter.)

Using Your Rights To Right Some Wrongs

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal

(We kick out some teenagers who are kicking balls around the store. One teen kicks the ball so high it hits the lights and breaks them. As I am kicking them out, with security as backup, one of the teens says:)

Teen #1: “It is my God-given right to shop at [Store].”

Me: “And it is my law-given right to kick you out of the store for breaking store property. We can also involve the police, who also have the law-given right to charge you and arrest you. Would you like me to exercise those rights?”

Teen #2: “Uh… no.”

Me: “Then use your God-given legs and get out of my store.”

(My coworkers were trying to look threatening behind me but burst out laughing when I said that.)

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