The Logic Is Weak In This One, Part 2

, | | Right | May 19, 2009

(I’m ringing up a fairly high-end video card for a customer.)

Me: “That’ll be $211.98 please…”

Customer: “But the display showed it as $49.99.”

Me: “Are you sure it was this card? This is a fairly new card.”

Customer: “Yes, I picked it up, and it says the price is $49.99 below it.”

Me: “Can you show me?”

(We walk over to the video cards, and he shows me where he picked it up from. The shelf is marked $49.99, and it is the same manufacturer. However, it is a lower end card than the one he is holding.)

Customer: “See, $49.99!”

Me: “Sir, that price is not for that video card. You’re holding this one…”

(I point to another shelf with the video card he picked up; it’s priced at $199.99.)

Customer: “Well, it was on this shelf, so it was advertised at this price and you have to sell it to me for that.”

Me: “I’m sorry for the confusion, sir, but sometimes customers pick things up and then don’t return them to their proper location.”

Customer: “That’s not my fault! It was on this shelf, so you should sell it to me for $49.99.”

Me: “Sir, how do I know it wasn’t you who put it on that shelf? Or for that matter, that it was on that shelf at all?”

Customer: “…”

Me: “So, do you want the $49.99 one instead?”

Customer: *defeated* “Yeah…”

 

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Delicious Deals

| | Right | May 18, 2009

Me: “Would you like this gift wrapped?”

Customer: “Yes I would.”

Me: “OK – here’s your receipt. Just head to the back of the store in about 5 min–”

(The customer eats the receipt.)

Me: “Oh…um, you actually need that to collect your purchase from gift wrap…”

(The customer spits the receipt onto the counter.)

Customer: “It didn’t taste very good anyway.”

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From Sprinting In Stilettos To Shin Splints & Sprains

| | Right | May 18, 2009

Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for high-heeled running shoes.”

Me: “Um…we don’t make high-heeled running shoes.”

Customer: “That’s impossible! I bought some here last year!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve been working here for 2 years, and I can assure you that we have never carried high-heeled running shoes.”

Customer: “Well, where can I find some?”

Me: “I’m pretty sure those don’t exist. Heels would defeat the purpose of a running shoe.”

Customer: “Fine! I’m not shopping here ever again!” *storms out*

Me: “Have a nice day, ma’am!”

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The Child May Get A Himself Complex

| | Right | May 15, 2009

(I was working at the registers as a lady walked in with a child in a stroller. One of the other employees walked up to her.)

Employee: “Aw, what a cute baby. What’s his name?”

Customer: “God.”

Employee: “You named the kid after God?”

Customer: “No, I named him God.”

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The People Of England Wholeheartedly Agree

, | | Right | May 14, 2009

Customer: “How do you change the language setting on The Sims?”

Me: “Well, I’d imagine there’s something in the game’s options. What did you need to set it to?”

Customer: “English.”

Me: “Funny, I’d think that would be the default.”

Customer: “But I can’t understand them!”

Me: “Wait, you mean the Sims themselves?”

Customer: “Yes! They’re speaking French!”

Me: “No, they’re speaking Simlish. It’s a gibberish language.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, it sounds like French!”

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