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Refunder Blunder, Part 23

| London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Time

(I am the manager in this situation.)

Manager: “Hello, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “Hi, I left an item here by mistake after paying for it.”

Manager: “Oh, that’s very easy to do when you’re busy; don’t worry! We hold onto lost & found items for about a week. What was the item?”

Customer: “It’s this.” *shows me a product she’s picked up from a shelf – shaving gel worth £3* “I called up the next day to tell you I’d left it.”

Manager: “That’s strange, none of my team told me to expect you… Who did you speak to? And can you tell me which day you called? That’ll help me find it.”

Customer: “I called at the start of May.”

(It is now mid-August.)

Manager: “You left something here in early May and are just coming to get it now?”

Customer: “Yes. Do you have it?”

Manager: “I’m very sorry, but we cannot hold onto lost items for three months. If you have your receipt, I will give you a refund for the item.”

Customer: “No, I don’t have a receipt. You really don’t have it?”

Manager: “No. I’m afraid that without your receipt to prove purchase, there is nothing more I can do.”

(I couldn’t believe that anyone would wait THREE MONTHS to come back to the store, particularly when the item was only worth £3!)

Related:

Refunder Blunder, Part 22

Refunder Blunder, Part 21

Refunder Blunder, Part 20

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That’s Some Very Explicit Baggage

| Cape Town, South Africa | Bizarre, Rude & Risque

(I work as a cashier at a well-known chain of pharmacies where “You Pay Less.” A woman approaches my till and sets her items down to be scanned. I start reciting the script as we are trained. Note that it is law to charge for the government-regulated plastic bags.)

Me: “Good day and welcome to [Store]. Do you have a [Loyalty Card?]”

Customer: *flings the card at me wordlessly*

Me: “Thank you.” *scans items* “Your total is [total]. Would you like a plastic bag?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “A medium bag will be [a few cents].”

Customer: “What?! This is a scam! They are bending us over and ramming us deep!”

Me: “…”

Customer: *loudly* “I’m telling you, it’s not much but it adds up. I must have spent HUNDREDS on bags in my lifetime! Hundreds to line the pockets of some GREEDY FAT CAT WHO JUST WANTS TO BEND ME OVER AND RAM ME HARD!”

Me: “So… would you like a bag?”

Customer: “I don’t want to be someone’s little b****! I’m not going to let them bend ME over!” *grabs her purchases and hurries from the store, muttering to herself about being ‘bent over and rammed’*

(The other customers in the line all cracked up.)

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Balls To The Walls Crazy

| Halifax, NS, Canada | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(I work for a luxury furniture company that has recently featured giant faux-fur covered pilates balls. A woman in her mid-forties runs into the store with a clearly abnormal level of excitement about the product.)

Woman: “I just came in to touch your balls. Oh! They’re so soft, I could just sit on them naked. They look like dirty snowballs. I want a dirty snowball so bad.”