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Stripped Of Your Cash, Part 2

| MN, USA | At The Checkout, Popular

(I work at a furniture retail store. A young woman and a man who appears to be her boyfriend are buying a couple small items and the woman hands over a handful of $1 bills for the purchase.)

Me: *trying to make small talk* “All $1 bills? Let me guess, waitress or bartender?”

Woman: “No, actually. Stripper.”

(I stop counting the bills and my face turns bright red up to my ears.)

Me: “Oh! My next guess was, um, garage sale.”

(Fortunately they were nice about the whole thing, but I was very embarrassed for asking.)

Related:
Stripped Of Your Cash

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Need Some Lights For All Their Darkness

| MN, USA | Bizarre, Popular

(I work at a furniture retail store as a cashier. I sometimes like to guess why customers are buying certain items, depending on the season, such as glasses for weddings, etc. We have a set of 100 white scentless tea-lights. A pair of customers, a man and woman who appear to be a couple, come to my register with about 10 packs of these, so I’m sure I know what they’re for.)

Me: “Lots of tea-lights! Let me guess, for a restaurant or a hotel?”

Woman: “Oh, no. Actually, we’re goth!”

(I burst out laughing. They look confused for a moment, but fortunately were understanding when I explained that that was the first time I’d gotten that answer.)

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Time To Start A Relationship With A New Laptop

| PA, USA | Love/Romance, Technology

(I work in a computer store.)

Me: “Okay, so, what seems to be the problem with your laptop?”

Customer: “It won’t turn on and it smells like burnt plastic for some reason. I think the motherboard is fried.”

Me: “Let me take a look at it.”

(He removes it from the box and I am horrified to find that it appears to have been smashed and set on fire.)

Me: “So… a little fried, huh?”

Customer: “Yeah… my girlfriend and I broke up a week ago. So, can you fix it or do I have to buy a new one?”

(On the plus side, I made a sale that day.)