(It’s a bit past closing. I’m pulling the trash from a can near the door when a guy starts banging on the door. My manager rushes over and starts telling him we’re closed.)

Manager: “I’m sorry, we’re closed!”

Customer: “I just need one thing!”

Manager: “The drawers have been pulled; we can’t sell anything.”

Customer: “But my fiancé works here and told me it was okay!”

(My manager looks at me, as I’m the only one engaged. I tell her I’ve never seen this guy in my life. She turns back to him.)

Manager: “Sir, we open at nine tomorrow. That’s the soonest you can come back.”

(He stormed off. We never saw him again.)

In my last job, working for an online retailer, if a customer complained enough, we were authorised to send them a gesture of goodwill — typically a £5 or £10 gift card — and we, as agents, advised that they would receive these within three to five working days.

I got a call one afternoon from the girlfriend of our customer, fuming that her boyfriend hadn’t received his gift card yet — this was on the fifth working day exactly — and she demanded a gesture of goodwill because the gesture of goodwill was late.  

She didn’t get it.

(I work in a dollar store. A customer comes up to me.)

Customer: “So, if I don’t see any prices, how do I know how much it is?” 

Me: “Miss, this is a dollar store;  everything is $1 or less and it’s marked if it’s less.”

Customer: “Well, you should still mark it if it’s a dollar so people know.” 

(She strutted off. Keep in mind that we have strips that say, “$1,” going down ALL the aisles.)

(My friend works at a store in the mall. She’s worked there for years when they hire a new manager. The manager tries to take over from the moment she is hired, changing everything and giving people useless tasks to complete. She even tries things like burning scented candles in the employee areas, which is a fire hazard, and trying to get all the team members to join hands in a “meditation circle” before every shift. My friend basically just ignores her and keeps doing her job. When the manager tries the bit with the scented candles, my friend douses them and turns them over to the mall security as a discovered fire hazard, and then reports to the manager that “someone” has burned candles, but that she’s taken care of it before they could start a fire. This all leads up the manager calling my friend in during the middle of a shift.)

Manager: “You’re not doing [tasks] like I told you to.”

Friend: “Are we closing early? Because we are only supposed to do that when we close.”

Manager: “I want us to keep doing it throughout the day.”

Friend: “Okay.”

(They both just stare at each other for several minutes.)

Manager: “Hand over your badge and shirt.”

Friend: “Excuse me?”

Manager: “You’ve been insubordinate since you started here.”

(Remember, my friend was hired years before this manager.)

Manager: “I’m not going to put up with it anymore. You’re fired!”

Friend: “Mm… no, I’m not.”

(And then, she just walked back out and went back to work. The manager kept sulking back in the office for the rest of that shift, but my friend didn’t hear another word about being fired from her after that. After telling us this, she admitted that she mainly wasn’t worried because she knew that that manager didn’t know anything about their computer system, so she couldn’t so much as change a schedule, much less fire anyone.)

(I work as a cashier at a drugstore. When I was hired, I told them I start to pass out if I stand still too long and they said they’d put me in the makeup section where I’d be moving around a lot. Unfortunately, I am good with customers, and I get put on the front register every single shift. The line today is long, and nobody comes up when I ask for a second cashier.)

Me: “Sorry the line is going slow. If anybody doesn’t want to wait, they can also check you out in cosmetics.”

(A few customers peel off, which is a relief. I’m overwhelmed and starting to get faint, and stress makes it worse. About five minutes later, one comes back to my line.)

Customer #1: “You said it was faster, but I’ve been waiting this whole time.”

Me: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t see she was doing a return. I’ll help you right away.”

Customer #1: “You should have checked.”

Me: “Yes. I made a mistake. I’m very sorry.”

(We finish going through the order, but I’m starting to pass out and can’t see or think clearly.)

Me: “Here’s your change. It’s ten… Sorry, ten… It’s…”

Customer #1: “You need to learn how to do your job.”

(He walks out in a huff.)

Customer #2: “Miss, are you all right? You don’t look well.”

(I pass out and smack my head on the way down. I have a concussion and have to be taken home by a coworker. A month later, the same customer walks in.)

Customer #1: “So have you learned how to do your job yet?”