I work in a store in a larger shopping center. I’ve seen bored middle-aged women hold up a line or register demanding a manager because of some insignificant thing. They even come in about things that are out of our control that have upset them, and now they need to complain about it in detail to the higher-ups.

This is my favorite.

Customer: “There’s a dead bird, and you need to clean it up!”

Me: “Where is it, ma’am?”

Customer: “It’s out in the parking lot! You need to pick it up!”

Me: “Ma’am, we can’t do that.”

She got very angry and stormed off.

This is during the height of the global health crisis. I work as a cashier and my store requires masks; we offer them at the door and cashiers are allowed to refuse service to anyone not wearing a mask.

I am stuck on self-checkout for the day, cleaning the machines and helping out anyone that needs to pay with cash. A group of three customers walks up to one of the machines and begins buying these little containers of sushi we carry, all unmasked.

Me: “Do you have masks?”

They respond with something like, “No, the constitution, my rights, blah, blah, blah,” so at this point I know they don’t want to cooperate.

Our self-scan has an assist mode used by any cashiers or managers to quickly fix a majority of the problems we encounter, but it also works as a pause button for customers and they have no control over it in assist mode.

I pop the machine into assist mode. The “leader” of the group is still trying to use the machine and I’m just holding back my smile; I have all the power in the situation.

Me: “I can’t help you if you refuse to follow company policy.”

The three of them were very visibly angry at this point, but they knew they had lost. One of them tossed the sushi on the machine and they just all strolled out without any of their stuff.

I pass a customer who is looking at kettles with a look of confusion and annoyance.

Me: “Hi. Is there anything in particular that you’re looking for? You seem to be struggling a little bit.”

Customer: “Hi. I’m looking for a kettle with no plastic in it. Your selection leaves a lot to be desired.”

I’m confused by the concept of a plastic-less electric kettle. However, our range of display items is small; perhaps she knows something I don’t.

Me: “I can’t guarantee that any of these don’t have plastic in them, sadly. Have you seen a kettle advertised with no plastic?”

Customer: “No. I decided this morning to live an eco-friendlier way, but apparently, you don’t support such lifestyles.”

She walked away. I was left standing there confounded at the concept of someone deciding that something exists, then being annoyed when it doesn’t, and THEN being all high and mighty that we don’t stock it!

I was working in a department store and had an older man come in for an item we were sold out of.

Customer: “Could I speak to a manager so they can bring me one from the back?”

I went and got my manager.

Manager: “Sorry, we’re still sold out. We don’t have any.”

Customer: “That’s not good enough. You’re a woman; you can’t be a manager! I want to speak to an actual manager.”

We brought him three managers, including the general manager for the store. He got more and more irate because they were all women and therefore couldn’t be actual managers.

He kept insisting he needed to speak to an actual manager. The general manager finally hauled a random employee from automotive who was one of our few male staff working that day.

Male Employee: “Sorry, we’re out of stock of that item.”

The guy shrugged and left.

The worst part is that it was a five-dollar item, and he was in the store for almost an hour wasting our time and taking us away from customers who actually needed help.

Related:
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 21
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 20
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 19
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 18
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 17

We shut the store at 4:59. Our official closing time is 5:00. A guy comes and starts banging at the door. We open it and politely tell him we’re closed for the day. He nods, starts to walk away, and then comes back and starts banging again. This time he’s waving his phone at us.

Man: *Shouting* “IT’S 4:59! TECHNICALLY, YOU’RE STILL OPEN! I NEED TO BUY SOMETHING!”

Me: “Our tills are already off for the day, so there’s nothing we can do.”

Man: “No, you have to let me in! I ran red lights and went past stop signs to get here in time!”

We have no red lights in our town; it’s very small.

Eventually, we sent someone to get the item he wanted and just had him give us the cash to put into the till the next day, just so we could get rid of him. The poor girl who had to get the item was shuffling around in the dark looking for it, and by the time we found it, it was five past closing time. The real kicker is that he was after twine. TWINE. It was $2.95 and could’ve been found at either of the two grocery stores in town, which were still open and literally just a block away. I was absolutely FUMING because I had somewhere I urgently needed to be at 6:00. I nearly ran late in the end.