Our manager is strict to the point of being unreasonable. It takes a turn one day when a female coworker is on her monthly cycle.

Coworker: “I’m going to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”

Manager: “No, you need to finish this first.”

Coworker: “No, trust me, [Manager], I really should go.”

Manager: “And why is that?”

Coworker: “Because I’m on my period, [Manager]! And I’m about to bleed out!”

As unreasonable as he is, he is married with daughters, so he let her go, but he tried to write her up for talking back to him. After the owner asked the assistant manager and me about it, he tore up the write-up and told our manager not to be a jerk again.

I’m working one of the garden center registers, and I am the only cashier out there. A young man comes to my register with three gift cards he wants to fill.

Customer: “And I’ll be paying with this.”

He pulls out a type of card I’ve never seen before, but I figure it must just be for a local bank.

Me: “Okay, how much would you like on the first card?”

Customer: “Two hundred, please.”

I enter two hundred dollars onto the gift card.

Customer: “You need to enter two hundred dollars cash, and then I’ll use my card to actually pay.”

Me: “Um… I’m sorry, but I can’t enter a cash payment unless you’re actually paying cash.”

Customer: “No, it’s fine. It’ll work. Just enter two hundred dollars and I’ll pay with my card once it gets accepted.”

Me: *Confused, but firm* “I can’t hit the cash button unless you give me cash. If you want to use your card, you can swipe or insert it now.”

This goes on a few more times until a manager comes out to check on me.

Customer: “You know what, never mind. It’s not that important.”

He walks off.

Me: “What was that?”

Manager: “That was a scam. Good for you for not falling for it.”

Me: “Oh.”

I work at a retail store for a major wireless carrier in a mall. It was a slow weekday afternoon with just me and another representative on the floor and no other customers present. The other representative was training me.

Three younger women walked in.

Woman #1: “Can I have my credit checked to get a phone?”

[Woman #2] stayed with the first while the [Woman #3] made a beeline for the Apple Watch display. [Woman #3] immediately triggered a pressure alarm on a watch, which I quickly deactivated before returning to my trainer. Then, [Woman #3] approached me.

Woman #3: “Can you throw something away for me?”

It appeared to be packaging, but I paid no attention to it.

[Woman #1] finished getting credit checked and left abruptly with the other two.

Then, an employee from another nearby wireless store walked in.

Employee: “Three women were just in our store and they stole some earbuds.”

We quickly realized that an Apple Watch was missing and that the packaging I had thrown away was from the stolen earbuds from the other store.

The information from [Woman #1]’s driver’s license that was required to process her credit check was forwarded to law enforcement. I felt like a dope because not only did I deactivate the alarm to the watch she stole, but I then helped her dispose of evidence. That was pretty bold.

My spouse and I are walking through the clothing section when a lady calls out to us, pointing to my spouse.

Customer: “Hey, you! Where can I find these pants in a size fourteen?”

Spouse: “Sorry, I don’t work here. I think there’s an employee by the dressing rooms.”

We continue walking.

Customer: “Hey! Hey! Get back here! I’m not done talking to you!”

I turn around, unfortunately just in time to see the lady grab my spouse’s arm.

Me: “Lady, wait—”

Too late. My spouse shrieks, grabs the lady, and throws her over them onto the floor. They back up afterward, muttering apologies all the while.

Customer: “Ow! F***! The a**hole threw me!”

Me: “My spouse already said they don’t work here! And even if they did, you shouldn’t be grabbing employees, much less ones who are combat veterans!”

While I was trying to comfort my spouse, the commotion attracted the attention of several actual employees, who subsequently called security. After questioning all of us, they determined that my spouse was acting in self-defense, and they and I were free to go. While the customer was able to get up and walk, she was taken to medical services anyway.

I thought that would be the end of it, but a month later, we received a notice from the customer’s lawyer that she was trying to charge us for assault due to the incident. Thankfully, the store was more than willing to provide security footage and witness accounts to prove otherwise, and the case was dropped.

We asked a customer to put on a mask in the store. He instantly went irate and started screaming.

Customer: “You’re violating my constitutional rights!”

And blah, blah, blah.

Just as he was starting to throw F-bombs, I had one of my allergy-induced coughing fits. They are very loud and sound like I have bronchitis. I cannot feel them coming on, nor can I stop them once they start. I just have to stand there and cough until I stop. This usually lasts anywhere from ten seconds to a full minute.

My coworkers know this cough well and tend to just ignore it or explain to customers that it’s just allergies. Not this time, though. To their credit, they all just stared at me wide-eyed while I coughed up a lung.

The man’s tirade quickly faded away and he backed away slowly and then just silently left the store.

My coughing fit ended shortly after he left, and my coworkers and I had a good laugh.