I have had a bad day. My manager is being a major jerk, my coworker is being bossy, trying to order me around, and not doing her job, and I dealt with a rude customer who called me a b****. This customer that I’m dealing with now is pleasant, until the end.

Customer: “Oh, why don’t you just [return her returned item a different way]?”

Me: “Ma’am, the return is already completed.”

Customer: *Still smiling* “Oh, but I think it would be easier for you to return [item] first and then do [different item]!”

Me: *Staring at her* “Ma’am, the return is already completed. I can’t return both items once they’ve been returned once. That’s like giving you free money.”

Customer: “Oh, well, how about I just buy both items back and you do it that way so it’s easier?”

I can tell she honestly thinks she’s helping me by asking me to return an already returned item a different way, but I’m at the end of my rope.

Me: “No, it will most certainly not be easier! You’re asking me to do the exact same thing over again which will waste everyone’s time and confuse the system!”

Customer: “Oh! There’s no need to be so rude!”

After I got written up for that one, I turned in my two weeks. My boss asked me to stay and promised me a raise, but I reminded him that he promised me a raise and instead gave it to [Bossy Coworker]. I found a better job at a children’s clothing store.

I’ve agreed on a price for my pushbike through an online marketplace. The buyer pays by bank transfer, and I leave the bike outside the front of the house but away from view until you get to the door.

I forget about it until the afternoon, when I get a message from the buyer complaining that it is nothing like the pictures, badly damaged, etc. His claims are so out there, it’s like he is talking about a completely different bike altogether. I go and check, and then I message him back.

Me: “That bike is not the one you bought. You took my wife’s bike by mistake.”

Buyer: “What are you talking about?”

Me: “The bike you bought is still here; you took the wrong one.”

I send a photo of the bike very much still here.

Buyer: “How was I supposed to know?”

Me: “With all due respect, one is a purple mountain bike, and you took a pink bike with a basket on the front.”

Buyer: “Well, what are you going to do about it?”

Me: “You can return the bike and we can swap it.”

Buyer: “No, I shouldn’t have to! You should bring it to me!”

Me: “This is your mistake. Please return the bike so we can swap it.”

Buyer: “No, I want my money back.”

Me: “Look, you stole my property. Return it and we can swap, or I will just refund you.”

He refused to do anything to help, and in the end, he stopped responding altogether. Luckily, my wife’s bike was worth nothing, so he actually did me a favour. I sold my bike again; this time the right one got picked up!

My wife and I managed to both buy our daughter a new coat on the same day without each other knowing. I won an eBay auction and she picked one out on her lunch break.

We let our daughter choose and she picks the one my wife bought, so I Iist the other one for sale on a local selling group.

Despite it being new and half the recommended retail price, I get a LOT of time-wasters — people wanting it for next to nothing or to swap for things no one would rightly want.

Eventually, a woman contacts me, agrees on the asking price, and arranges a date for the following week.

The day before:

Woman: “Can we lower the price? I’m a little short on cash this week.”

Me: “Sorry, the price is firm; I explained that in the ad. I can hold it for you for another week, though.”

Woman: “Come on. I only agreed to the price to be nice. I can get it cheaper.”

Me: “Do it, then. The price is firm.”

She sends me a picture from eBay; it’s the same coat, but it’s not in such great condition and still has three days left.

Me: “And? My coat is new, and I guarantee that price will go up.”

She doesn’t respond for the rest of the week.

Woman: “Okay, I will have the coat, but at [slightly lower price].”

Me: “No, you won’t. The price is firm.”

Again, she goes quiet for two more days.

Woman: “Fine, I’ll have it, then. Not worth it, though.”

I do not respond.

Woman: “Hello? Answer me.”

Me: “Not for sale.”

She sent me half a dozen more messages before I blocked her. Fortunately for us, in the time she spent messing us around, the other coat fell apart at the seams. We got a full refund. Her squabbling and my refusing to lose £5 saved me around £40 in a new coat!

When I worked in retail, we had this lady who was incredibly annoying. She would be picking up meds for herself, her husband, or her daughter — who was eighteen and on [ADHD medication] — and she would always give us the biggest attitude when we asked for the full date of birth associated with the patient.

Customer: “It’s a HIPAA violation! What if someone hears it? I’m a lawyer, you know.”

Cool, except her daughter had the same name, month, and day of birth, and the same drug but different doses as another patient. We had to confirm the year so there wouldn’t be a mix-up, but she threw a fit every single time.

Sometimes the daughter would come in and pick up her or her mom’s or dad’s meds. [Daughter] was a sweetheart, which was surprising given how much of a monster her mom was. She was a no-fuss patient, gave us the information we needed, and was on her way.

One day, [Customer] and [Daughter] came in together. I asked for the daughter’s full date of birth, which in turn caused [Customer] to rampage into her “I’m a lawyer” speech. However, today, for some reason, her daughter snapped.

Daughter: “MOM, STOP TELLING EVERYONE YOU’RE A LAWYER! YOU HAVE A LIBERAL ARTS DEGREE! YOU CAN’T ARGUE YOUR WAY OUT OF A PAPER BAG! MY DATE OF BIRTH IS [FULL DATE OF BIRTH] AND I DON’T CARE WHO HEARS IT!”

My entire pharmacy team stopped what they were doing in stunned silence. [Daughter] stormed off, and [Customer] was basically speechless for the entire transaction. She snatched the drugs from me and walked out.

I still think about this four years later and it gives me so much joy.

I was serving a customer at the checkout. I gave her her total.

Customer: “Oh, just a second. Let me find my wallet.”

She started digging in her purse and pulling out items. She casually whipped a vibrator out of her bag and put it on the counter so she could keep searching!