All’s Well That Messengers Well

| Toronto, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Health & Body, Money

(I work at a healthcare store. Whenever we have promos such as gift cards when purchasing more than a certain dollar amount, we call our regular customers a week in advance to let them know. After each call, either actually talking to the customer or leaving a message, we put a check next to their name on our list. One cranky regular misses the promo weekend and comes in three weeks later.)

Customer: “Hello, [My Name]. I’m just parked outside. Can you get me my products?”

Me: “Sure, I’ll be right back.”

Customer: “Don’t you have any promos? You haven’t had one since December.”

Me: “No, I know it’s been a while.”

(I make sure not to mention the promo three weeks prior, as I know she missed it, and I am sure she will throw a fit. I go to the back to get her products. As I am coming back, I see the customer yelling at my coworker. She then turns to me.)

Customer: “This is so disappointing! I told you guys to call me every time you have a promo. [Coworker] said that you had one three weeks ago!”

Me: “Oh, we did call you. I’m sure we did. You’re the first one we call.”

Customer: “No, I did not get any call. No message. This is the second time!”

Me: “I remember the first time you said your daughter forgot to tell you.”

Customer: “Well, this time I really didn’t get any call! No message, nothing!”

(The customer goes on and on as I am ringing her in, and I am just nodding. She’s always in a hurry, so I need to ring her in as I am listening. I can see the other customers looking at her.)

Me: “I really apologize, but as you see here on our call list, I called all these customers including you. Your name even has an asterisk ’cause you’re the first one we call.”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t get anything! There could be something wrong with my answering machine, but I doubt it! You guys owe me!”

(The customer storms out of the store. The next day she calls.)

Me: “Good afternoon, [Store]. [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Oh [My Name], this is [Customer]. I just called to apologize for my behavior yesterday. I asked my daughter if she knew of any promos you guys had, and she just gasped because she forgot to tell me that you guys called.”

Me: “That’s okay Mrs. [Customer]. It’s not a problem.”

Customer: “Okay, thank you. Bye!”

Try Before You Psy

| USA | Language & Words, Musical Mayhem

(I work in a store that sells movies, games and music among other memorabilia. A customer approaches me.)

Customer: “I’d like to exchange this CD.”

Me: “I can offer you store credit, and you can use it to purchase anything in the store.”

Customer: “Well, I was looking for this same CD but in English.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “My daughter asked me for this CD, but it seems I made a mistake, as it’s all in Chinese! I want the CD in English.”

(She shows me the CD in question, and I see it’s a ‘Girls’ Generation’ album, a Korean girl group.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; this album is of a Korean girl group. They sing in Korean.”

Customer: “Korean, Chinese, whatever, I just want the American version with the songs in English!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, they’re Korean singers. They sing in Korean. They have Japanese albums too, but we don’t have them, though.”

Customer: “So they’re not in English?”

Me: “I’m afraid not.”

Customer: “Then why the h*** do I want to listen to it if I can’t understand it?”

Thinking Outside The Box, Part 4

| IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

Customer: “I want to buy an iron.”

Me: “Okay, our irons are right here. Is there something specific that you’re looking for?”

Customer: “Oh, nothing too fancy; it’s a gift. This one looks good, but I’d like you to open it to make sure that everything is inside.”

Me: “No problem.”

(I open the box, show the customer the iron and manual, put everything back, and close the box back up. It looks the same as it did before I opened the box.)

Customer: “Oh, great, thanks.”

(The customer puts the iron back on the shelf. It’s the only one of its kind on the shelf, but on the very top shelf is another one. The customer points to the unopened box on the top shelf.)

Customer: “Can you hand me that one right there?”

Me: “Okay, would you like me to open that box, as well?”

Customer: “No! I don’t want to give my niece an open box for her wedding!”

Me: “Pardon me, but if I opened that box to make sure that the iron and manual were inside, wouldn’t it make sense to open that other box, as well?”

(The customer looks blank.)

Me: “I mean, how do you know that the iron and manual are going to be in that box up there?”

Customer: “Because I opened a box.”

Me: “But not that one up top.”

Customer: “I. Opened. A. Box.”

Me: *giving up* “Here, let me get you that iron…”

Related:
Thinking Outside The Box, Part 3
Thinking Outside The Box, Part 2